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I don’t know about you, but for the life of me I cannot remember the various usernames and passwords I have for all FIVE MILLION online accounts I use.

I actually have a book that I keep them in, but it’s so messy and unorganized that it takes me FOUR hours to flip through each page and find the login information I need.

For being someone who is so OCD about things, I cannot believe how CHAOTIC I am when it comes to organizing my user ID’s and passwords. I don't even alphabetize them, I just write them down in the book on the first page that I happen to open.

Now the user ID's I don't have as much difficulty remembering because I usually alternate them between the two different email addresses I have, or I have two different words I use. Yet, it’s the passwords I have the hardest time recalling. Especially for certain accounts that I don't use all the time.

I try to make my passwords only slightly varied, like maybe one additional letter or number, but attempt to keep them basically the same.

However, some of the initial sign up registration information on many websites require that you create a password that is so challenging and annoying, you would swear that you were creating a security code for the front door of the United States Mint. It's utterly ridiculous because they require it to be at least 8-10 characters long and must contain CAPS, numbers, lowercase letters, vowels, symbols, and the date you lost your virginity.

So you pick one like this:
And then I love how after you finally come up with a password, the strength meter on the bottom of the window reads: WEAK STRENGTH

So you try and pick another one:
And the meter reads: WEAK TO SLIGHTLY MEDIUM STRENGTH

So you try another one:
And the meter reads: SLIGHTLY MEDIUM STRENGTH

So you try another one:
And the meter reads: MEDIUM BUT GETTING STRONGER

And by this time you’re so annoyed and frustrated, you type in the password:


And the meter finally reads: EXCELLENT STRENGTH…WELL DONE!


Have a faaaabulous weekend everyone!
And I hope you have better luck than me remembering your passwords.
X

52 comments:

  1. Do not make me laugh at quarter til midnight! I might wake someone! Bwahahahaha! I love your strongest password!


    How ironic ... I had to sign in to comment. ROFL!

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  2. The password is...BULLSHIT! I feel your pain, Ron! My company's system makes us change our passwords regularly as a security measure, but the only one who can't get into the system is me!


    I feel like the old Secret Agent Man--giving you a number and taking away your brain! I am constantly requesting a new password and promptly forgetting that one, too.


    And yet with all this secrecy, it seems like every other day there's a news story about some massive computer hacking crime.


    Love this post--and your excellent strength password. Have a great weekend, buddy! The password is fun!

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  3. Oh wow, what a laugh. I just had to get Joe here to read your post. You and he have exactly the same problem with passwords. Now I'm wondering if he'll be a bit braver and use a WTF style. BTW he said he likes the logical conclusion! So did I... whaaaaaaa!


    On a more serious note, because I am a control freak, I have all my passwords on a spreadsheet. As I acquire a new one, I add it to the list. The spreadsheet is kept in a drawer along with other important stuff. Mind you a lot of them are in code, the idea being that if a nosy parker gets hold of the list he won't know what it's all about. A.ll I have to remember is the code.... LOL.


    Have a wonderful weekend and thanks again for the laugh xx

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  4. Hahahaha!!!! I love that. I must admit that I've never gotten to the point of the FUCKYOUASSHOLE!!!! password, but I've come close. It's probably not a good idea that I use about 4 to 5 passwords across my 10-15 password accounts. Some are set to automatically remember (not a great idea if my laptop ever ends up in the wrong hands). And the ones I hardly use I just reset the password every time I need to log in. But I get the frustration with passwords. And I hate those little letters and numbers they have under some accounts that ask you to verify that you're a real human-being. Those are my biggest pet peeves:-)

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  5. Hahaha, you know I feel your pain! I finally got mine reset, Now, if only I can remember it! Hope I don't get hacked again! (Amazing my accounts can get hacked when I can't get in them myself!) And yes, I felt like using that same password many times!

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  6. Ron, I'm sitting at my desk at work right now, laughing so hard at this. You are hysterical! And I know what you mean because so many of the sites you have to initially sign up for to register, the user id and password login information is so annoying.


    I know I shouldn't do this, but I use the same login on most of the sites I join, with the exception of the ones like you shared. I have two different email addresses that I use too, but the passwords are the same


    I'm going to read this post once more so I can laugh again.


    Thank you for giggles this morning. And have a wonderful weekend, Ron x

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  7. Hey there Jean!


    Tee, hee! Lately, I've been so aggravated about remembering my passwords, I just HAD to share this. And it seems that more and more websites are making the registration process sooooo annoying. Especially when it comes to the password.


    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a FABU weekend!


    X

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  8. Hey there Rob!

    "The password is...BULLSHIT!"

    HAHAHAHAHHAHA! THANK YOU!!!!!

    " My company's system makes us change our passwords regularly as a security measure, but the only one who can't get into the system is me!"

    OMG...you're kidding? That would make me insane because I have a hard time remembering the passwords I already have.

    "And yet with all this secrecy, it seems like every other day there's a news story about some massive computer hacking crime."



    I know! IIsn't that something? What used to be secure, is no longer secure. Perhaps because people are finding more and more ways to hack.


    Much thanks for stopping by, buddy. Have a SUPER weekend!


    X

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  9. Gooooooood morning Valerie!

    "Now I'm wondering if he'll be a bit braver and use a WTF style. BTW he said he likes the logical conclusion! So did I... whaaaaaaa!"

    HAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHA! And please tell Joe I said THANK YOU!

    "I have all my passwords on a spreadsheet. As I acquire a new one, I add it to the list. The spreadsheet is kept in a drawer along with other important stuff. Mind you a lot of them are in code, the idea being that if a nosy parker gets hold of the list he won't know what it's all about."



    OMG...what a GREAT idea!!!!!! And I may try that myself because as it is now, I have all my passwords scribbled in a book in absolutely no order.


    Much thanks for stopping by, dear lady. Wishing you and Joe a lovely weekend!


    X to you both!

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  10. LMAO. I'm the same way: I just jot them all down in a little spiral notebook, un-alphabetized, with no rhyme or reason. But then I'm paranoid about somebody finding the book, so I'm kind of dodgy about what I write in there. Instead of VISA account 8932, for instance, I'll write "credit card" and then the password will be "the cat one." Which then requires me to figure out which credit card, and then remember what "the cat one" is, exactly.


    Life sure was simpler before the Internet...

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  11. Hey there Nicky!

    " I must admit that I've never gotten to the point of the FUCKYOUASSHOLE!!!! password, but I've come close."

    I know, you get to a point where you scream WTF!?!?!?!?

    " Some are set to automatically remember (not a great idea if my laptop ever ends up in the wrong hands). And the ones I hardly use I just reset the password every time I need to log in."

    Yes, I think and do the same thing. Also, about every month and a half, I clear out my complete browser history and login information, so I have to reset them. I do it as a security measure, but then I can't remember what all my login information is - HA!

    " And I hate those little letters and numbers they have under some accounts that ask you to verify that you're a real human-being. Those are my biggest pet peeves:-)"



    OMG...THANK YOU!!!!!!!! I hate those things too!


    Much thanks for stopping by, Nicky. Have an awesome weekend!


    X

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  12. Suzi, I was sooooooooo thinking of you when I was writing this because of what happened. I actually wrote this post earlier this week, but then when you said that you couldn't remember your password, it was too IRONIC because I have the same problem.

    " Hope I don't get hacked again!"



    Me too. I just blows me away how people can hack an email address. How the heck do they do it?!?


    Thanks much for stopping by, my friend. Have a super-duper weekend!


    X

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  13. Hola Denise!

    " And I know what you mean because so many of the sites you have to initially sign up for to register, the user id and password login information is so annoying."

    Isn't it the most annoying and aggravating thing? Grrrrrrrrrr!#@?*!

    "I know I shouldn't do this, but I use the same login on most of the sites I join, with the exception of the ones like you shared. I have two different email addresses that I use too, but the passwords are the same."



    Do you know for awhile I did the same thing - I used all the same info, but then will all the security hacking that goes on, I started using different passwords; just altering them a bit. However, with how difficult it's become to initially sign up for registration, I want to go back to making them all the same.


    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. Have a wonderful weekend too!


    X

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  14. Hey there Mark!

    "I'm the same way: I just jot them all down in a little spiral notebook, un-alphabetized, with no rhyme or reason."

    You too?!?!?! Good, I'm glad to hear I'm not the only one who does that.

    "Instead of VISA account 8932, for instance, I'll write "credit card" and then the password will be "the cat one." Which then requires me to figure out which credit card, and then remember what "the cat one" is, exactly."

    Bwhahahahahahaha! OMG Mark, that is sooooooo funny! But hey, I like your idea!!!!!

    "Life sure was simpler before the Internet..."



    Amen!


    Much thanks for stopping by, bud. Have a super weekend!


    X to you and Tara!

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  15. " and the date you lost your virginity.

    ROFLMAO!


    And I feel your annoyance and frustration because I feel the same way when I have to set up an account online. I use the same user ID on all my accounts, but change the password. And over the past couple of years, the password requirements have gotten so involved that I don't even want to sign up.


    Love your password. Hilarious post, dude!

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  16. Hiya Matt!

    "And over the past couple of years, the password requirements have gotten so involved that I don't even want to sign up."

    Thank you! I mean I understand why they do it, for security purposes. However, it HAS gotten so involved that it will often deter me from registering.

    Much thanks for stopping by, buddy! Have a faaaaabulous weekend!

    X

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  17. Yes!!!! Fuckyouasshole! What a great password. hahahaha! I feel like such a failure when the password meter says weak.


    Don't get me started on user names and passwords. Recently, I wanted to make an appointment at the Genius bar at the Apple store. Apparently, you have to be a genius to make an appointment with a Genius.


    I couldn't remember my user name. And resetting a user name isn't an option. So, I was screwed. My husband had to make the appointment for me. When I was at the Apple store, the Genius found my user name on my iPhone.


    As far as managing passwords and user names, I use LastPass, which helps to a degree. I still have problems with user names and passwords, at times, because LastPass saves multiple passwords. You have to indicate if a password is your "favorite" and then not to accidentally delete said "favorite" password. And if you forget the password for signing into the password manager, you're really screwed!

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  18. Oh man, can I relate to your frustration! I did finally alphabetize my 'cheat sheet' but so many times, I don't bother to write down the account/password, thinking I will never visit the site again. Wrong!

    What I hate the most are the security questions. One time it asked for my siblings birthday. Ok, easy enough, I only have one sibling. Well, no matter how many different ways I entered his birthday, it didn't accept it! I have no idea how I botched it up the first time! Typo?

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  19. Hey there Bijoux!

    "but so many times, I don't bother to write down the account/password, thinking I will never visit the site again. Wrong!"

    Yes! Yes! I do the same thing!!! But then, when I suddenly realize (MONTHS later) that I have to go back to that site, I can't remember them.

    "What I hate the most are the security questions. One time it asked for my siblings birthday."

    THANK YOU, yes! I try to use the same one (what was the name of your first pet?), but now I noticed that they ask for MULTIPLE security questions.

    Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr!?*!?@!??

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a super weekend!

    X

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  20. Ha! Excellent observation Ron.
    I've got a pretty good memory for these things, but I agree that they are a complete pain in the aSSh3OL?e.
    Ps- Elaine thought this post was hilarious. (She has a lot of unresolved computer anger issues, haha)

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  21. Hey there Lauren!

    " I feel like such a failure when the password meter says weak."

    Meeeeeeee too! It's like, how much more challenging do I have to make it so that it's STRONG????

    "Recently, I wanted to make an appointment at the Genius bar at the Apple store. Apparently, you have to be a genius to make an appointment with a Genius."

    Bwhahahahahaha! OMG...that CRACKED ME UP!!

    "I use LastPass, which helps to a degree. I still have problems with user names and passwords, at times, because LastPass saves multiple passwords."

    Oh wow...I have never heard of LastPass, so thank you so much for letting me know about it!

    "And if you forget the password for signing into the password manager, you're really screwed!"



    HA! You are so funny!


    Much thanks for stopping by, Lauren. Have a super-duper weekend!


    X

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  22. Hey there Dale!

    "I've got a pretty good memory for these things, but I agree that they are a complete pain in the aSSh3OL?e."



    Good for you. I am soooooooo jealous that you can remember them, because I can't.


    And please tell Elaine I understand. Us Libras have ZERO patience and tolerance for stuff like this.


    Much thanks for stopping by, buddy. Have SUPER weekend!


    X to you and Elaine!

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  23. I know passwords drive me nuts! I try to use a word I will remember so I can capitalize the first letter & it still makes sense to me. I use an excel spreadsheet to keep track of my passwords so I can re-organize them alphabetically if I want.

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  24. Hey Benze!

    " I try to use a word I will remember so I can capitalize the first letter & it still makes sense to me."

    That's kinda what I try to do too - change a letter or a number within the same password, but also being a password that's basically similar.

    " I use an excel spreadsheet to keep track of my passwords so I can re-organize them alphabetically if I want."

    Great Idea! Gotta start doing something like myself.

    Much thanks for stopping by, my friend. Have a fantabulous weekend!

    X

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  25. Oh, Ron, how funny this is! You know, usernames and passwords are challenging for ALL of us, even the techy types. I can't begin to tell you how many times I've written mine down in my little "cheat book," then scratched through them, re-written them down in more findable order, and begun the entire process all over!

    You've hit the nail on its head with your description of the password strength meter, too! By the time one succeeds in getting a VERY STRONG password, the doggone thing is impossible to remember -- or type, ha!

    Thanks for a wonderful Friday chuckle -- have a FUN weekend!

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  26. First off, you sound just like Mo. She has a book and write hers on the first page that it falls open on, but worse, she doesn't write what site the user name and password is for!

    On the other hand, I have a bit of password protected software installed on my computer, my phone and my iPad, that I sync across all three. It holds every bit of important info from passwords to insurance policies and bank accounts. Then just to be extra careful I don't lose it, off all three things, I have a special USB 'key' that it is also installed on and synced with my computer.

    Here's how I make up my passwords. I think of a sentence, that I won't forget. I pick the first letter from each word. I use 'special' characters and numbers to split the letters in to groups of three, capitalizing the first of each group of three...... still with me? Then I add 2 or 3 initials of the site the password is for. I stick to exactly the same password for every site, just altering the initials, which is the last group of letters and the site the password is for. That way, I can never forget a password and it is always a good strong one. Is that as clear as mud?

    Sentence: Ron is my very good friend, for Facebook password:-
    - Pretty strong, I think?

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  27. FUCKYOUASSHOLE!!!!!!


    "And the meter finally reads: EXCELLENT STRENGTH…WELL DONE!"



    LMAO! I get so pissed at that thing too, Ron. Can they make it harder to pick a password that is secure enough to equal a good strength? I get to a point where I don't even care how strong it is, I just add the password and say screw it! I keep all my passwords in a document, this way if I forget them I just open it and there they are. I learned this though, from lack of remembering.


    Great post! You express the frustrations of life so accurately.

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  28. Hey there Debbie!

    ". I can't begin to tell you how many times I've written mine down in my little "cheat book," then scratched through them, re-written them down in more findable order, and begun the entire process all over!"

    HA!!!!!! Yes, my entire book is FILLED with scratch outs too because I first write the password down that I choose, but then when it's too weak (or already taken) I have to pick ANOTHER ONE. And then ANOTHER one!

    " By the time one succeeds in getting a VERY STRONG password, the doggone thing is impossible to remember -- or type, ha!"



    YUP!!!!


    Much thanks for stopping by, my friend. Hope your Friday was fabulous. Enjoy your weekend!

    X

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  29. Hey ho Robert!

    "I get to a point where I don't even care how strong it is, I just add the password and say screw it!"

    HA! Me as well! I mean HOW STRONG does it have to be in order for it to be secure anyway? I miss the days when you just typed in any old password and it worked. When I first got online, I used the same exact password for every account.

    "I keep all my passwords in a document, this way if I forget them I just open it and there they are. I learned this though, from lack of remembering."



    Yes, I need to start doing that myself. A lot of people here said they do the same thing.


    Thanks a bunch for stopping by, buddy. Have a most excellent weekend!


    X

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  30. Hiya Babs!

    "you sound just like Mo. She has a book and write hers on the first page that it falls open on, but worse, she doesn't write what site the user name and password is for!"

    Bwhahahahahahah! OMG...how funny! And please tell Mo, I love her! She's adorable!

    ((((((((((((((( Mo ))))))))))))))))

    "On the other hand, I have a bit of password protected software installed on my computer, my phone and my iPad, that I sync across all three."

    WOW...that is so AWESOME!

    "Then just to be extra careful I don't lose it, off all three things, I have a special USB 'key' that it is also installed on and synced with my computer."

    Way to go, Babs! Man, I need to more like you. And it's funny that you mentioned a USB key because I have one but never use it for anything. Perhaps I could used it to download my passwords on AFTER I put them on a document, just for safe keeping.

    Okay...and I LOVE the way you come up with a PASSWORD!

    "$Rim?2Vgf?2Ffb?2$ - Pretty strong, I think?"



    Yes...and it's absolutely BRILLIANT! Cheers!


    Thanks so much for sharing that, Babs! Have a super-duper weekend!


    MUCH x to you and Mo!

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  31. Glad it's not just me who gets annoyed about passwords. Ron, I decided to write them down but in a code form and guess what? When I forget my password, I can't remember the code I used to remember my original password :( This is all so crazy. Don't they realise that as we get older, we lose a few brain cells along the way? That's why I love mobile phones so much, because you just look at a name and press it, without having to remember all those long phone numbers :)

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  32. years ago Andy Rooney did a wonderful rant about account numbers, how he didn't understand why there needed to be more numbers in his account number than there were people on the planet
    this made me think of that
    hilarious
    hope I can remember my password to submit this comment

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  33. Ron, I do it because it's the only way I can remember them, ha!

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  34. Which is why I think I need to start doing that myself. Oy vey!

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  35. Hey there Lady Dianne!

    "years ago Andy Rooney did a wonderful rant about account numbers, how he didn't understand why there needed to be more numbers in his account number than there were people on the planet"



    HAHAHHAHAHAHA! OMG...I have to see if I can find that on You Tube because it sounds hilarious!


    Much thanks for stopping by, dear lady. Hope you're having a super weekend and staying warm!


    X to you, Hope, Athena, Siren, and Isadora!

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  36. Hey there Rum Punch!

    " Ron, I decided to write them down but in a code form and guess what? When I forget my password, I can't remember the code I used to remember my original password :( This is all so crazy. Don't they realise that as we get older, we lose a few brain cells along the way?"

    Bwhahahahhahahaha! HILARIOUS, man!

    " That's why I love mobile phones so much, because you just look at a name and press it, without having to remember all those long phone numbers :)"



    I know. And can you believe I DON'T have a cell phone?!? I know so many people who keep, not only phone numbers, but so many other pieces of information on their phones.


    Thanks so much for stopping by, buddy. Have a GREAT weekend!


    X

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  37. ahahah. i so understand and i'm getting worse at remembering. i too have a book ron, but i bought a small phone book that way i could alphabetize my sites. no flipping, i just go right to the letter of the site.


    i also have one i keep on my phone because i don't want to carry around my book, if i lose it....trouble. the one on my phone is password protected, so i'm not worried about it if i lose my phone.

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  38. Hellooooooooooo Val!

    " i too have a book ron, but i bought a small phone book that way i could alphabetize my sites. no flipping, i just go right to the letter of the site."

    I know, can you believe that I TOO put them in phone book, and STILL don't alphabetize them? What the hell is the matter with me?!?!

    "i also have one i keep on my phone because i don't want to carry around my book, if i lose it....trouble."

    I read an article online last week, in which someone else mentioned that. He said that he had all his info in his phone, so when it lost it...he lost everything. But at least you keep your info in a book as well - as a backup.

    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. Have a super Sunday!

    X

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  39. BAhHhhAHhHAhHAHHAHhHA!!

    Creating AND remembering passwords will be the death of me!!

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  40. Hey there Meleah!

    HA! Meeeeeeeeeeee too!!!!!

    OMG...the initial process of setting up passwords on some sites is like getting a root canal without any NOVOCAINE.

    It's PAINFUL!

    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. Hope you're having a warm and cozy weekend!

    X

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  41. And the worst are sites that make you periodically change you password.


    I used to have a fairly simple password that I used all the time but can't anymore. I've read that sentences are much harder to guess, so I do a sentence with a symbol and a number that would only be important to me, plus something with the company's name. But only for important things that involve financial or personal information. For other things I use a very simple password. Because what do I care if someone hacks into my fitbit or goodreads account?

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  42. Hey there Secret Agent Woman!

    "And the worst are sites that make you periodically change you password."

    Agreed! Also, sometimes if I can't remember my password, they give you the option to change it. So then I have to make up another, which I inevitably forget - HA!

    "I've read that sentences are much harder to guess, so I do a sentence with a symbol and a number that would only be important to me, plus something with the company's name."

    Awesome idea! Never heard of that but I'll try it the next time.

    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. Hope you had terrific weekend!
    X

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  43. Ron, I didn't read Babs comment below mine when I first commented, but I read it this time. Great way she creates a password!

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  44. I know!!! It's awesome, isn't it?

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  45. Bwahahahaha! Yeah, I've been down that road many a times. I like your technique, and can appreciate the final password you selected. Heh....man, I can't stop laughing here. Genius post!

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  46. Oh it's a NIGHTMARE! I have an app on my phone where I list passwords I have to use a lot and a memory stick which contains ALL my passwords. :(

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  47. Hey there Pearl!

    "I have an app on my phone where I list passwords I have to use a lot and a memory stick which contains ALL my passwords."



    I have a memory stick, but don't use it. I need to start though, to store my passwords because that's a GREAT idea!


    Thanks so much for stopping by, m'dear! Have a lovely week!


    X

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  48. Hey wait a minute! We have the same password!!! Oh wait, mine is FUCKYOUBITCHES! So ours are slightly different. HA HA!

    Working in IS, I see so much with passwords. If I go to someone's desk, I can almost guarantee half of them have sticky notes under their keyboards with their passwords. Or in the top left drawer of their desk. Way back when, before hard passwords, all the physicians used the name of the hospital as the password!

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  49. "Oh wait, mine is FUCKYOUBITCHES!"

    Katherine, you're KILLING me! That's HILARIOUS!

    " If I go to someone's desk, I can almost guarantee half of them have sticky notes under their keyboards with their passwords. Or in the top left drawer of their desk."

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    "Way back when, before hard passwords, all the physicians used the name of the hospital as the password!"

    WOW!

    God, when I was a kid, the only thing we had to remember was a school locker combination - HA!

    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl! Have a FAB week!
    X

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  50. Oh my, I laughed out loud with this one! Fantastic wit! I have 2-3 password combinations I use, and a computer file where I've logged all of them. As long as I can remember my computer password, I'll be fine!!

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