Prior to making a decision in my life, I get very quiet. I have learned, that for me, it's best if I don't discuss or ask for feedback from others as I make a change. I prefer to go within and allow myself to be guided for my own good. Privately.
People don't mean it, but they tend to project their own fears and worries on you if asked for advice because they imagine that it's them making the change. And let's face it, the majority of people in this world are paralyzed by change because change is uncertain. People need certainty because to them, certainty means security. Yet, there is no certainty or security when you make a change.
In fact, there is no such thing as security. Period. Nothing in this world is secure because nothing in this world is, and ever will be, permanent.
However, I don't just carelessly make changes without any preparation. I make a plan, and then move forward with it.
People don't mean it, but they tend to project their own fears and worries on you if asked for advice because they imagine that it's them making the change. And let's face it, the majority of people in this world are paralyzed by change because change is uncertain. People need certainty because to them, certainty means security. Yet, there is no certainty or security when you make a change.
In fact, there is no such thing as security. Period. Nothing in this world is secure because nothing in this world is, and ever will be, permanent.
However, I don't just carelessly make changes without any preparation. I make a plan, and then move forward with it.
I've also learned that before making certain changes, I first have to physically, mentally, and emotionally let go of what I no longer desire, so that what I do desire can enter my life.
Which brings me to the point of this post.
I resigned from my job without having another job lined up.
And do you know what? I am not the slightest bit scared or uncertain about my choice because I know beyond the shadow of a doubt, it was time. So, I consciously planned and saved for it.
Without getting into all the reasons I resigned, I will sum it up by saying that over the past two years I've seen the company I used to work for gradually change the image it projects to the public. And that image does not coincide with my own beliefs.
Make no mistake, I still love what I do and feel incredibly passionate about it. However, I need to do it in my own way.
I've been in this industry for over 30 years now. And it's about time I took all that knowledge and experience and created my own business and how I want it to be projected.
The thing that disappointed me the most about the company I used to work for is that for all its efforts to make women feel beautiful, it has done the complete opposite. It has made women feel that only "youth" is important, or of any value. Therefore, that's where it has focused all its energy and attention.
On the young.
And, oh, how foolish that is because catering to the young is a losing battle because the young are only interested in one thing, "the next new thing." They have no loyalty or commitment to anything other than what's new.
Perhaps I realize this because when I first started in this business, I was in my late 20's and assisted female clients who were in their 40's, 50's, 60's, and over. And I quickly realized that the most appreciative and loyal customers were the "mature" women. They were the ones who consistently came in every month and replenished their products.
Back then, mature women were the sustainable bread and butter of my business. Therefore, I learned to respect and honor them.
The company I used to work for has no interest in mature woman, by doing everything in its power to alienate them. I can't tell you how many times women walked up to me in the store and told me that I was the only one who made them feel welcomed. And when I continually relayed this to the company and suggested to them that they start paying more attention to their mature clientele, nothing was ever done about it.
Not only do I find that sad, but also just plain stupid because this particular company is suffering right now, due to their obsessive compulsion to invest millions of dollars, year after year, trying to figure out new ways to entertain and hold on to the younger clients. When in fact, all they have to do is redirect a percentage of their efforts to the mature clients who, a) are the more loyal clients, b) are the more appreciative clients, and c) are the clients who spend the money.
So, my plan is to eventually start a small business of my own as a mobile personal shopper and stylist for mature women. I did this for a brief time when I lived in Florida, but then my career took me elsewhere, so I dropped the ball.
However, it's time I pick that ball back up and focus my efforts on honoring what it is that I love to do most in this industry--assist mature women to accentuate their beauty.
I see nothing negative about using makeup, skincare, and hair care products.
My outlook and approach to beauty products has never been about making women look younger. My approach has always been about allowing women to celebrate their own unique beauty, and using products to bring it forward.
Personally, I have always found mature women the most attractive and the most interesting.
I know that what I'm about to say may sound discriminatory to some people, but quite frankly I don't give a shit, because the whole world has been discriminating against mature women for centuries.
I find the youth of today who are into beauty and makeup, utterly boring and tired. They all obsess and strive to resemble carbon copies of one another with the same eyebrows, the same cheekbones, the same nose shape, and the same lip shape. And that's because they are all watching the same YouTube videos that are programming them on what it means to be perfectly beautiful.
Pick up any beauty magazine or watch any YouTube beauty blogger tutorial, and you'll see exactly what I mean. Every single one of them looks the same. Like a premade mannequin. Boring.
No...
I much prefer the look of maturity.
Faces with character.
Faces with a history.
Faces that look as though they've been lived in.
Bellissima!
P.S. I'll keep you posted on my business venture with occasional updates throughout the next several months. 😊
Which brings me to the point of this post.
I resigned from my job without having another job lined up.
And do you know what? I am not the slightest bit scared or uncertain about my choice because I know beyond the shadow of a doubt, it was time. So, I consciously planned and saved for it.
Without getting into all the reasons I resigned, I will sum it up by saying that over the past two years I've seen the company I used to work for gradually change the image it projects to the public. And that image does not coincide with my own beliefs.
Make no mistake, I still love what I do and feel incredibly passionate about it. However, I need to do it in my own way.
I've been in this industry for over 30 years now. And it's about time I took all that knowledge and experience and created my own business and how I want it to be projected.
The thing that disappointed me the most about the company I used to work for is that for all its efforts to make women feel beautiful, it has done the complete opposite. It has made women feel that only "youth" is important, or of any value. Therefore, that's where it has focused all its energy and attention.
On the young.
And, oh, how foolish that is because catering to the young is a losing battle because the young are only interested in one thing, "the next new thing." They have no loyalty or commitment to anything other than what's new.
Perhaps I realize this because when I first started in this business, I was in my late 20's and assisted female clients who were in their 40's, 50's, 60's, and over. And I quickly realized that the most appreciative and loyal customers were the "mature" women. They were the ones who consistently came in every month and replenished their products.
Back then, mature women were the sustainable bread and butter of my business. Therefore, I learned to respect and honor them.
The company I used to work for has no interest in mature woman, by doing everything in its power to alienate them. I can't tell you how many times women walked up to me in the store and told me that I was the only one who made them feel welcomed. And when I continually relayed this to the company and suggested to them that they start paying more attention to their mature clientele, nothing was ever done about it.
Not only do I find that sad, but also just plain stupid because this particular company is suffering right now, due to their obsessive compulsion to invest millions of dollars, year after year, trying to figure out new ways to entertain and hold on to the younger clients. When in fact, all they have to do is redirect a percentage of their efforts to the mature clients who, a) are the more loyal clients, b) are the more appreciative clients, and c) are the clients who spend the money.
So, my plan is to eventually start a small business of my own as a mobile personal shopper and stylist for mature women. I did this for a brief time when I lived in Florida, but then my career took me elsewhere, so I dropped the ball.
However, it's time I pick that ball back up and focus my efforts on honoring what it is that I love to do most in this industry--assist mature women to accentuate their beauty.
I see nothing negative about using makeup, skincare, and hair care products.
My outlook and approach to beauty products has never been about making women look younger. My approach has always been about allowing women to celebrate their own unique beauty, and using products to bring it forward.
Personally, I have always found mature women the most attractive and the most interesting.
I know that what I'm about to say may sound discriminatory to some people, but quite frankly I don't give a shit, because the whole world has been discriminating against mature women for centuries.
I find the youth of today who are into beauty and makeup, utterly boring and tired. They all obsess and strive to resemble carbon copies of one another with the same eyebrows, the same cheekbones, the same nose shape, and the same lip shape. And that's because they are all watching the same YouTube videos that are programming them on what it means to be perfectly beautiful.
Pick up any beauty magazine or watch any YouTube beauty blogger tutorial, and you'll see exactly what I mean. Every single one of them looks the same. Like a premade mannequin. Boring.
No...
I much prefer the look of maturity.
Faces with character.
Faces with a history.
Faces that look as though they've been lived in.
Bellissima!
A celebration of mature beauty!
Have a faaaaabulous week, everyone!
X
P.S. I'll keep you posted on my business venture with occasional updates throughout the next several months. 😊
I am delighted that you have made this decision, Ron, and I wish you every success. You can guess how many times I have been pushed to one side at beauty counters in favour of serving younger females. At 85 I still take pride in my appearance and wouldn't have it any other way. I remember putting one assistant in her place after she commented that a young girl needed her attention more than I did. Ooooh was I MAD!
ReplyDeleteGood luck with your new venture. I am thrilled for you, my friend. Three cheers!
Ron, I've been wondering about you because you haven't done a personal post in a while. I understand how you must have felt, wanting to make this decision without any outside influence. Good for you to venture out on your own and do what you enjoy doing. And YES, isn't it ridiculous how all these girls want to look the same? And omg on all the Botox young girls are getting. It actually makes them look older, in my opinion!!!! So dumb.
ReplyDeleteI'm looking forward to hearing more about your business and I wish you all the luck in the world. Have a super new week! XO
"People don't mean it, but they tend to project their own fears and worries on you if asked for advice because they imagine that it's them making the change." Ron, no truer words have been spoken. I agree! People mean well, but they share advice based on their own fears. I believe that ultimately our choices can only be made by ourselves.
ReplyDeleteCongratulations on your decision to resign and follow your heart. You mobile personal shopper plan sounds awesome! If I lived closer to you, I'd hire you!
The best to you, Ron. Keep us posted.
Ron, I can't tell you how much I appreciate this post because as a "mature" woman, I can't stand how the beauty industry (and society) sets up the standards for what beauty is supposed to look like. And it starts with the younger girls, so that by the time they hit 30, the believe that they're already OLD. I use skin care and makeup products, but only to take care of my skin and to highlight my facial features. But I use very little. I think using too much makeup, particularly powder, makes your skin look dry and weathered.
ReplyDeleteI love your idea about starting a business as a mobile personal shopper/stylist for mature women. I'm sure women adore you, so I'm sure you'll get a lot of referrals.
And I applaud you for having the guts to resign from your previous job and do what you truly want to do. I wish you the very best!
I'll be anxious to hear how it all works out. Keep us update! X
Oh Ron, I forgot to say in my previous comment that I loved this, "Faces with character. Faces with a history. Faces that look as though they've been lived in." Yes!
ReplyDeleteGood for you, Ron! Sometimes you have to take a leap of faith and trust that it will all work out. It has in my case and I have no doubt you'll be successful, too - because you have passion for your work and a true appreciation for mature women. They, in turn, are going to love you - I just know it.
ReplyDeleteAnd maybe you can move your operation to NYC in a year or two!
Mark, it's so ironic that you mentioned NYC because that's one of things I thought of when making this change. Because I'll be mobile, I can take my business anywhere. And even if I don't initially move there, I can be making "connections" as I work there periodically. Also, I am going to NYC tomorrow for the day. I get so much inspiration from that city, so I'll be spending a lot of time there within the next couple of months as I make plans.
ReplyDeleteThanks so much for your kind words of encouragement, my friend. And thanks so much for stopping by. Have a faaaaaaaaaaabulous week!
X to you and Tara.
I LOVE the look of a mature face! I think maturity (in both women AND men) is so attractive and sexy!
ReplyDeleteHey there Elaine!
ReplyDelete"....can't stand how the beauty industry (and society) sets up the standards for what beauty is supposed to look like. And it starts with the younger girls, so that by the time they hit 30, they believe that they're already OLD."
OMG...YES! I can't tell you how many customers I've assisted who were 29 and getting ready to turn 30 and were FREAKING out about getting older. It's the industry, the media, and society that does this to women. And it kills me because they don't put the same kind of pressure on men, do they?
"I use skin care and makeup products, but only to take care of my skin and to highlight my facial features. But I use very little. I think using too much makeup, particularly powder, makes your skin look dry and weathered."
GOOD. FOR. YOU.! I always tell women that when it comes to wearing makeup, less is more. And I am totally against face powder, for the same reason you mentioned--it makes the skin look dry. Skin should have a "glowy" look, not a matte, dry look.
Thanks so much for your words of encouragement, my friend. I am really looking forward to doing this. As I shared, I used to do this in Florida.
Have a faaaaaaabulous week! And stay cool!
X
Hello Candice!
ReplyDelete"I believe that ultimately our choices can only be made by ourselves."
Yes...yes...yes! And I believe the same thing. Which I why I don't ask for feedback. I make my decisions based on my gut feelings.
Thanks so much for your words of encouragement, my friend. Thank you!
Have a terrific week!
X
Aw...thank you for your well wishes, Valerie :)
ReplyDelete"At 85 I still take pride in my appearance and wouldn't have it any other way."
*cheering*
That's AWESOME! And I think it's important to take pride in ones appearance because often when you look your best, you FEEL your best. I too take pride (and always will) in my appearance.
"I remember putting one assistant in her place after she commented that a young girl needed her attention more than I did. Ooooh was I MAD!"
And I don't blame you for being MAD because I would too! And that's what I'm talking about, beauty companies/stores ignore mature clients. All their attention goes to the younger girls, who never know what the hell they want anyway. HA!
I love attending to the mature clients because they are genuinely interested in your advice and remain loyal customers.
Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a glorious week!
X
I've been contemplating this decision for some time now. In fact, I almost resigned the month before last, but felt that I needed to wait another month. And I'm happy that I followed my feelings because I ended up getting a PTO (personal time off) payout that will be at least another full months pay! I never took time off, so now I'm getting those hours paid to me.
ReplyDelete"And YES, isn't it ridiculous how all these girls want to look the same? And omg on all the Botox young girls are getting. It actually makes them look older, in my opinion!!!! So dumb."
Ironic you mentioned that because I spoke to a customer not too long ago who was in her MID-20's and was already getting Botox. Apparently, doctors are telling their patients to start early with Botox instead of waiting until they get older because it's less noticeable. I can't imagine they money they're paying for Botox and this young age!?!
Thanks so much for stopping by and for your well-wishes, my friend! I'm excited about this.
Have a super week!
X
Oh Ron - you spoke directly to me! As you say, ageism is widespread and it is only getting worse - in all walks of life, including jobs... Being a middle-aged woman and upwards in age means invisibility in Western culture. Good for you, Ron! I wholeheartedly applaud you!
ReplyDelete"...ageism is widespread and it is only getting worse - in all walks of life, including jobs..."
ReplyDeleteYou are absolutely right, Fiona! And yet it's funny because in the various jobs I've had over the years, I've worked with both younger and older coworkers, and find the older ones much more responsible, reliable, and dedicated. Not all of them, but many of the younger ones literally have no comprehension of what it means to have job and take it seriously.
"Being a middle-aged woman and upwards in age means invisibility in Western culture."
Yes, you're spot on about that. And yet, I find it ridiculous that it's not the same for men.
Thanks so much for stopping by and for your supportive words, my friend. Have a faaaabulous week!
X
GOOD for you, Ron!! I wish you much happiness, peace, and success in your decision. Like you, I tend to go inward when I have a huge decision to make. I don't want anybody -- however well-meaning -- to try to convince me before I've made the decision, or to influence me one way or the other. I think we reach a point where we know ourselves best and where we realize only we can look after our best interests.
ReplyDeleteYou know, it's not just beauty counters that shun mature customers. Some restaurants and clothing stores do, too. As you said, the young 'uns are busy flitting back and forth to "the next new thing," while the mature are the loyal buyers, the ones with money to spend and a thirst for knowledge. What a shame your company didn't recognize that -- and losing a valuable employee like you is going to be to their detriment.
I love Coco Chanel's quote: "Nature gives you the face you have at twenty. Life shapes the face you have at thirty. But at fifty you get the face you deserve." 'Nuff said. xx
Debbie, you stated it SO PERFECTLY when you shared this...
ReplyDelete"I think we reach a point where we know ourselves best and where we realize only we can look after our best interests."
A-MEN! And like you, I don't want anybody (however well meaning) to convince me before I make my own decision. I leaned that early on in my life.
" it's not just beauty counters that shun mature customers. Some restaurants and clothing stores do, too."
You are absolutely right about that...it's A LOT of other things as well. And it's been that way for centuries. Yet, as a kid, I always admired the mature because I saw them as "wisdom and knowledge." Young people never interested me. Even when I was young.
And OMG...thank you for sharing the quote by Coco Chanel, it's BRILLIANT! And I can't believe that I didn't know that about Coco because I worked for the Chanel company for SIX years.
Thanks so much for stopping by and for sharing your insight, my friend. Appreciate it! Have a fantastic week!
X
X
Ron, what a courageous decision!
ReplyDeleteI applaud your determination and confidence! I know you will be a smashing success!
Your comments about this obsession with youth are spot-on.
You're doing a tremendous service to mature women who want to take care of their appearance--and who can do that better than you!? If only your company and countless other "youth-oriented" outfits felt the same way.
I'd never quit one job without having another one lined up, so I'm truly impressed. Your bravery is quite inspiring, buddy! Best of luck to you, now get out there and raise some hell!
Thank you so much for your kind and encouraging words, Rob :)
ReplyDeleteI've been feeling this change coming on for some time now, but the timing wasn't right. Finally, it was.. So, I wrote my letter of resignation one night and them the following day I handed it to my boss. After I did it, I knew it was exactly the right time.
" If only your company and countless other "youth-oriented" outfits felt the same way."
Yes, and I told them my feelings on numerous occasions because corporate would ask me my feedback on better ways to make the company. However, they never took my feedback seriously because nothing was ever done.
Since resigning, I've already had job offers from various companies. However, I want to take time off (the month of June) and focus on creating my personal shopper business. Yet, it's good to know that if I do need extra income, companies will be willing to hire me.
Have a great rest of your week, buddy!
X
Ron, you express yourself so well. This post is so inspiring! Every single thing you shared about aging is spot on! Even me, I'm in my late 30's and already cringing about turning 40 because it sounds so old. And what you also said about the younger generation and their use of cosmetics is so correct. I've stopped watching makeup tutorials because they're all the same, over-done. I don't have time to put on that much makeup. But even if I did, I think it's unnecessary. There is no reason to wear that much makeup.
ReplyDeleteYou idea of starting your own business as a mobile personally shopper sounds awesome! Being in the industry for as long as you have, I'm sure you have a lot of connects. And I'm sure you already have a substantial following of clients.
Congratulations on your decision to resign and do what you love. Bravo, Ron! xo
Hola Denise!
ReplyDeleteYou know, I hear so many women say the same thing when approaching 40, it's sounds old. But I have to tell you, it's not. I think women get better looking with age. Besides, one of the greatest things about aging is that you become more comfortable with yourself. There is a certain "freedom" in aging.
" I don't have time to put on that much makeup. But even if I did, I think it's unnecessary. There is no reason to wear that much makeup."
OMG....YES! I stopped watched video tutorials on YouTube years ago because they're so boring and ALL THE SAME. And waaaaaaaaay too much makeup! The only YouTube beauty blogger I will sometime tune into is Lisa Eldridge from the UK. She's wonderful!
"Being in the industry for as long as you have, I'm sure you have a lot of connects. And I'm sure you already have a substantial following of clients."
That's one of things I'm grateful for. I've been doing this for so long that I made a lot of connections with people who know my work and are willing to support me.
Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. Have a faaaaaaabulous rest of your week!
X
Ron, I applaud you for following your gut and doing what you know is best for you. You are such an inspiration! And I know that anything you set your mind to do, you'll do it.
ReplyDeleteHappy for you!
Thank you, Matt! I so appreciate your words of encouragement. I've always been someone who knows when it's time to make a change. It may not always make sense to most people, but it does to me.
ReplyDeleteHave a great week, my friend. And thanks so much for stopping by!
Oh my, where to even begin with this post! First of all, congratulations on your entrepreneurial endeavor. I believe you will fill a long-overdue void in our culture. I wish you all the best and success in this next phase of your life (you will need to bump up your social media presence). Second, I couldn't agree with you more about how our culture panders to idea of youth and flawless beauty. This is soooo obvious with the majority of fashion magazines. The best way for me to feel crappy about myself if to look at one of these rags. And, you are correct in that many of this younger generation know little about loyalty since they are "one and done," and then on to the next shiny, new thing. Many have the attention span of a gnat. So, kudos to you for taking such a leap of faith. it sounds like a fantastic opportunity. :-)
ReplyDeleteThank you, Lisa! And again, thank you for your email!
ReplyDelete"You are correct in that many of this younger generation know little about loyalty since they are "one and done," and then on to the next shiny, new thing. Many have the attention span of a gnat. "
HA! I swear to god, I always say the same thing -- they attention span of a GNAT!!"
I've been in this industry a long time, so I can see (behind the scenes) how it's changed over the years. It has no respect for mature women. And it's sad because mature women are the most loyal clients of them all.
I've always held women in high regard; especially mature women. I feel that it's time people stop ignoring them.
Thanks so much for stopping by and adding your insight and suggestions, my friend. Appreciate that!
Have a super weekend!
X
Oh, bravo, Ron!!! That's really wonderful news. It makes me think of that saying, "Do what you love, the money will follow." And I don't think anyone can really be content working for a company that doesn't share their values.
ReplyDeleteOur cultures idolization of youth really bugs me. All the emphasis on "anti-aging" products, as if aging was an evil. Now more than ever, I am embracing aging because I'm so grateful to be here. Every day is a gift to me now.
I know you will be successful in this new venture and, more importantly, happier.
Thank you, my friend :)
ReplyDelete" It makes me think of that saying, "Do what you love, the money will follow." And I don't think anyone can really be content working for a company that doesn't share their values.
Yes, you are spot on about that. As I shared, I still really love what I do, however, I couldn't do it in that environment any longer. And I will be sharing more about that in a future post.
"All the emphasis on "anti-aging" products, as if aging was an evil. Now more than ever, I am embracing aging because I'm so grateful to be here. Every day is a gift to me now."
OMG, I LOVE how you said that because I feel the exact same way. Why do they refer to skincare products as "anti-aging"...as if there is something wrong about aging??? And it's ironic you mention that because on my new website/blog that I am getting ready to launch, I will writing a post about the term "anti-aging."
Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. And for your encouraging words.
Hope you're having a great weekend!
X