My Perception On Aging And Turning 65


October 2, 2020 marked my 65th year on this planet. 

And do you know what?

I have to say, I truly enjoy aging. 

Aging is something, even as a kid, I eagerly anticipated because I always felt like an old soul and that my body needed to catch up to it. 

I couldn't wait to acquire gray hair and lines on my face. 

I find an "aged face" attractive. Even sexy. And that goes for men and women. 

To be honest, young, smooth, unlined faces are uninteresting to me because they haven't yet developed any character.

There is nothing more beautiful or handsome than a face that's been embossed with character because it's like seeing a map of someone's journey. 

So yes, I am an advocate for aging. And not only physically, but mentally, emotionally, and spiritually as well. 

Today I would like to share my own perception on aging.

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About The Body


Although I consider myself an optimist, I'm a realist. And there is one thing I've learned about the body. No matter what I do in the way of eating, exercising, taking supplements, skin care and body care, my body is going to age. 

That's a fact of life. 

Therefore, the best thing I can do for myself is to take care of my body, but also be realistic.  

I've been blessed with a strong body that has been extremely healthy most of my life. Sure, I've had a few medical issues come up over the years, but my body seems to heal quickly. I also have a tremendous amount of energy. In fact, there have been several 20-year-old's who I've worked with that have asked, "Ron, where the hell do you get all your energy? You never seem to tire." Yet, I have noticed various things changing. The joints in my hands and knees sometimes ache. My reading eyesight is becoming more challenged. I have to get up in the middle of the night to urinate more frequently. And I've noticed that I forget things, so I have to be diligent about making to-do lists. 

One of the most helpful things anyone can do as they age is to not expose themselves to the bombardment of advertising and social media that brainwashes the public into believing that their face and body should remain forever young. And that used to be something that was targeted only at women, but it is now something men are dealing with as well because society is obsessed with staying young. 

Trust me, years ago I worked at a medi-spa where I would see women and men come in for Botox, fillers, and body sculpting procedures to recapture their youth. And it was sad because it never seemed enough. They always wanted more and more treatments. All they could see when they looked in a mirror, were faults and imperfections. Many would say, "I have no intention of ever aging. And I will fight it with everything I can."

Now, I do believe in taking care of my skin and body? Yes, I sure do. However, I have no desire to look like I did when I was younger. I take care of myself because I want to be healthy and always look clean and well-groomed at any age.

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About Acceptance


One of the most valuable things I've learned through aging is acceptance. And acceptance not only when it comes to aging, but with life's many twists and turns as well. 

I've realized that no matter what happens, life goes on. Evolution requires life to move. 

So I've learned (and am still learning) to embrace what I can't control. And to create grace around it. 

Aging has taught me that my life is continually transitioning. Which is why I try to embrace things, rather than struggle with them.

When I allow things to be as they are rather than try to control every aspect of my life, I make space for what’s next.

And that's a big part of aging.

Acceptance; continually making space; and moving upward. 

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About History


My past is what made me what I am today.

It's my history.

And what aging has taught me is that everything in my history added value to my life. And like most people, my history (particularly in my childhood) included periods in which I was challenged not to see them in any other way than negative experiences. However, in time, I realized they were not. 

Over the past eight months, I've had a lot of alone time to reflect on particular parts of my history by bringing them closer. I now view them with tremendous gratitude. And as difficult as some of those moments were in my childhood, I believe 100% they were necessary. Because although those experiences were choices and actions made by other people, they were my lessons to learn from. 

I can't change my history. I can only accept it. And I can either see myself as a victim, or I can see my history as something that gave me opportunities to evolve.

No one on this planet grows up without bruises or scars.

No one. 

Yet, looking back, I wouldn't change a single thing about my history.  

And that's the truth. 

My truth. 

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The Value in Aging

It doesn't surprise me being an advocate for aging that my favorite types of buildings are old. That's one of the reasons why I enjoy the cities here in the Northeast -- they have such character. In fact, just the other day I was walking in a section of Philly known as, Old City, and found myself looking up at the some of the most deliciously gritty, vintage architecture, and felt so connected to it. 

And that's because of its history.

One of the things I cherished about traveling to certain cities in Europe and Asia, was their long, rich history that you could feel as you walked through the streets. 

Whenever I see an old building or structure, it's such a potent reminder to me about how aging has value.

Yes, as we age, our structure does change. 

But with aging also comes valuable experiences, an acquired wisdom, and a beauty that is only attained through the process of aging. 

Just like an old building with its discoloration, and nicks and cracks, it continues to reveal a soulfulness that only history has the power to create.

And that is exactly how I perceive aging.

As having tremendous value and beauty...


Have a faaaantastic weekend, everyone!
💗

26 comments

  1. Ron, what an inspiring and timely post! I've been going through a lot of conflicting thoughts and feelings about aging because I'm moving into my mid-40's and feeling that weird pressure. I really love your whole perception about aging. You're so right about advertising and social media brainwashing the public into believing that they can hang on to their forever youth. As you said, acceptance is so much a part of aging. Yes, take care of our body, but be realist about it.

    I also love your thoughts on our HISTORY. So true!

    Thank you for sharing this today, Ron. What wonderful read. I play to reread this when my thoughts go elsewhere.

    And Happy Belated Birthday! x

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  2. I will use a word that you often use to express how I feel, faaaaaaaaabulous post, Ron!!! I'm read this at work this morning and passed it on to two of the women I work with who share my sentiments, faaaaaaabulous post! LOL!

    I really loved what you said about the value in aging and comparing it to older buildings/structures. I too feel that way about older buildings. They're beautiful.

    Several years ago, I read a book on the Japanese culture and how they value and respect their elderly community. That's how it should be everywhere because as you said, with age comes wisdom.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts and feelings on this topic, Ron. And Happy Birthday to you! xo

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  3. Well, I’m sorry I missed your big day! Happy belated!

    I’m a few years behind you, Ron, but I’ve also been seeing similar changes in my body. Joint pain, frequent urination, lots of skin problems and new allergies. Last week, I was diagnosed with vitreous detachment, another sign of aging. I honestly thought I had a cataract! So it was actually good news. Lol!

    But you’re right, no matter how much we eat right and exercise, aging is inevitable. To make up for it, I try to dress on the younger side! I have no interest in fillers, etc., but I do use make up to my advantage and take care of my hair and skin as best as I can. It makes me feel good, so I figure that’s what matters.

    I’ve tried to let go of the past, but my husband and I have also cut out negative people (both friends and relatives) from our lives. I can’t begin to tell you how life changing that has been. But I do agree with you that there are always life lessons to take away, no matter what or who was involved.

    Thanks for your inspiring post on aging and acceptance. You have lots of blog friends who love and accept you! XO

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  4. Hey there Candice!

    Thank you! Happy to hear you got something from this post. I starting writing it last week, but didn't have time to finish until last night.

    Isn't it something how advertising and social media brainwash the public into "ageless beauty?" My thoughts have always been, beauty is in the eye of the beholder and to me, I've seen aging as beautiful.

    Through this pandemic, particularly back in the spring, I had lot of time to reflect on my history, which was such a positive thing for me.

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a great rest of your week and weekend!

    X

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  5. Hola Denise!

    I laughed when I read your first paragraph because, yes, I DO use faaaaaaaaaaaaabulous a lot! I can't help it, it's such great a expression for how I often feel when I love something.

    Aren't older buildings beautiful? I know this may sound strange, but when I see an older, building or structure, I feel it in my soul.

    "Several years ago, I read a book on the Japanese culture and how they value and respect their elderly community. That's how it should be everywhere because as you said, with age comes wisdom."


    OMG...Yes! Yes! Yes! And I don't if you remember a post I shared many years ago, but I lived in Japan for two months and loved it. And the way in which they treat their elderly community is to touching because they have the utmost respect. In fact, in all the subways, they have signs that read, "Please have respect and offer your seat to our elderly."

    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. Have a faaaaaabulous day and weekend!!!

    X

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  6. Thank you, dear friend. :) My birthday came so fast this year, I actually forgot about it until the night before when I thought, "That's right....tomorrow is my birthday!"

    " Last week, I was diagnosed with vitreous detachment, another sign of aging. I honestly thought I had a cataract! So it was actually good news. Lol!"

    Thank you for sharing that info because I had never hear of that before. I just googled and bookmarked it, so I can read about it later tonight. Happy to hear it's wasn't a cataract. Whew!

    "I have no interest in fillers, etc., but I do use make up to my advantage and take care of my hair and skin as best as I can. It makes me feel good, so I figure that’s what matters."

    AMEN to all of that! As I shared, I too take care of my skin and body. And yes, I feel that when you look good, you FEEL good. Whenever I get a cold or something like that, I always shower and shave and get dressed because it actually makes me feel better.

    " I have also cut out negative people (both friends and relatives) from our lives. I can’t begin to tell you how life changing that has been."

    Oh believe me, I too have done the same thing because I won't put up with people who are constantly negative. I don't have time for that.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts and feelings, my friend. Appreciate that!

    And thank you for your sweet, kind words.

    X to you!

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  7. Ron, it seems to me that not only do you have a good and healthy body, but you have a good and healthy mental attitude as well! You know, our bodies are very much like machines. We, too, have a planned obsolescence, where we eventually wear out and pass on. And I agree with you that, in the meantime, the best we can do is to treat our bodies and minds with respect and do the beneficial things science tells us to so we'll age gracefully.


    There's nothing sadder than the aging "sorority girl" or "football jock." They cling to their youth like a drowning man clings to a chunk of wood in a raging river. Everybody -- but them -- knows how silly they look, but they keep trying to recapture those "glory days."


    I'm not saying we shouldn't do all we can to look and feel our best! But so much of aging (in my humble opinion!) is mental and emotional -- and those with youthful, interested spirits can run rings around those who grow "old" with depression and a "what's the use?" attitude.


    Great thoughtful post, my friend! Enjoy the rest of your week! xx

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  8. I think you can add wisdom to your list of things beautiful about aging. Your post is full of wisdom! I completely agree with everything you said. Our culture is obsessed with youth and a distorted view of beauty. I believe how people handle aging has a lot to do with their attitude about themselves and life. My attitude vacillates between the extremes most of the time. 😜 Many days I'm conflicted about how I view the aging process...mainly when a health issue raises its ugly head and reminds me I'm not 30 anymore. Exceptional post. I enjoyed it and thank you for the wise reminder. X

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  9. Ron, thank you so much for sharing your insights! This post is a blueprint for happiness and a roadmap for aging gracefully.

    My mom used to say "the best tunes are played on old violins" and I thought of that line while I was reading your post.

    I'm just two years behind you and I think about the future. This society puts such a tremendous emphasis on being young that people become obsessed with age.

    I fond the discussion about your history particularly helpful, as I often go through these bouts of regret.

    The pandemic has only served to amp up these negative feelings, so the idea of viewing one's history with gratitude rather than regret is a very healthy and intelligent choice.

    Keep it up, buddy! You're aging like a fine wine.

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  10. Hey there Debbie!

    You know, I LOVE what you said here...

    "You know, our bodies are very much like machines. We, too, have a planned obsolescence, where we eventually wear out and pass on. And I agree with you that, in the meantime, the best we can do is to treat our bodies and minds with respect and do the beneficial things science tells us to so we'll age gracefully."

    ....because you're spot on about that. And it's funny you mentioned "like a machine" because when I initially wrote this post, I had written that our bodies are very much like an automobile!

    And AMEN to this as well...

    "I'm not saying we shouldn't do all we can to look and feel our best! But so much of aging (in my humble opinion!) is mental and emotional -- and those with youthful, interested spirits can run rings around those who grow "old" with depression and a "what's the use?" attitude."

    Yes! Yes! Yes! A huge part of aging is mental and emotional. And I couldn't age more with what you said about "youthful, interested spirits" because aging is so much about staying interested and curious about life!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your wisdom, my friend. You've added much to this post!

    Have a superb weekend!

    X

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  11. Hey there Lisa!

    " Our culture is obsessed with youth and a distorted view of beauty. I believe how people handle aging has a lot to do with their attitude about themselves and life. "

    Yes! You are sooooooooooooooo correct about that! Aging DOES have so much to do with a person's attitude about themselves and life. It's all in how we "perceive" ourselves AND life that makes the journey of aging an upward move. Sure, our bodies are going to have health issues as we age, no doubt about it, because as you said, we're not 30 anymore. However, back then I didn't have the wonderful life experiences I now have at 65. And I don't think when I was 30, I appreciated my body as much as I do now. I just took it for granted. But that's part of aging as well. Learning to see the things in my life to grateful for.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your wisdom, my friend! Have a wonderful weekend!

    X

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  12. Hellooooooooooo there Rob!

    "the best tunes are played on old violins"

    OMG....I LOVE what your mother used to say, it's BRILLIANT! And it's even more ironic because the violin is my all-time favorite instrument!

    And you're right, society does put so much emphasis on being young. However, when I look back to when I was younger, I knew NOTHING compared to what I know now. The more I age, the more "aware" I feel.

    And you're also right about the pandemic amping up negative feelings. That's why I find it so important take time each day to focus on the positive things about my life. We have to be very diligent about our state of mind right now and what we focus on because that's what is going to save us from all the negative energy. And in doing so, I truly believe that we help others to do the same thing.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your insight, buddy! Have an AWESOME weekend!

    X

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  13. Ron, for as long as you and I have been connected through your blog, I've told many times how much you've inspire me. Because when you share your perceptions and experiences about your life, I learn so much from them. Both my girlfriend and I read this post last night and got so much from it. The part about history was so enlightening because you're right, we all have things in our history that were "not the best." Yet, we have the choice to either see ourselves as victims, or we can use them to evolve.

    I feel connected to older buildings too. I like to just stand back and look at them. By the way, the last photo you shared of the building is AMAZING! It's so Medieval.

    Great post, dude!

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  14. Hiya Matt!

    Thank you so much for your words. I think we ALL inspire each other. That's one of things I most enjoy about blogging -- sharing our experience, because they give us something to ponder and learn from -- a different perspective.

    We can all look back on our childhood history and see things that were not pleasant to experience. Like I shared, we all have scars and bruises. But I refuse to see myself as a victim because I truly believe that those things happened so that I would GROW from them. They were MY lessons. And seeing myself as victim only keeps me back there instead of moving forward. It's all in how I choose to perceive them.

    Aren't older building STUNNING? I love that last photo. And you are so right, it does look Medieval! It's reminded me of Dracula's castle. LOL!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing, my friend. Always enjoyed! Have a terrific weekend!
    X

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  15. Ron, yes, I do remember you sharing stories on your blog about the time you spent in Japan. I am so envious because I would love to visit. Perhaps one day when traveling becomes safe again. x

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  16. Denise it was SUCH a wonderful experience! I enjoyed every moment. It's a LONG travel trip, however, it was so worth it. I'd do it again in a heartbeat!

    X

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  17. Ron, you share so much valuable insight about aging in this post. I can see you as a guest speaker for others, or writing books!

    There are so many sections of this post that I enjoyed reading, but part about acceptance and history really hit home for me. And it's because I feel that the two go hand in hand. I so agree with you about accepting/embracing your history. We all have things in our past that were hard to experience, but as you said, being a victim only keeps those experiences in the past instead of moving forward (or upward). I most certain have things in my childhood history that affected me deeply. It's taken me awhile, but I'm really grateful for those things because they made me stronger.

    "So I've learned (and am still learning) to embrace what I can't control. And to create grace around it." That expresses it perfectly.

    I'm the same age as you, so I could really identify with your feelings. Like you said, there is not a damn thing we can do about the body aging. But we can certain do something about how we embrace it.

    Thank you for sharing, Ron. Very special post! xo

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  18. Hellooooooooooooo there Elaine!

    I can't thank you enough sharing your insights about aging; particularly being the same age because we can really identify with life at our age.

    "I most certain have things in my childhood history that affected me deeply. It's taken me awhile, but I'm really grateful for those things because they made me stronger."

    Yes, me as well. In fact, my childhood history has been such a valuable means in becoming who I am now. Some of what I went through was really tough, but I have a choice to be bitter about them or better in spite of them. Looking back, I actually view those experiences as some of the best experiences of my life. I know that may not make sense, but I do.

    I've always admired the people of met who have gone through tough times and rose above them because they have inspired me to be the same.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your insight, neighbor! You've added much to this post.

    Have a fabulous weekend! X

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  19. Ron, I'm 30 years old but I've always felt the same about aging as you do. I too always felt (and still do) like an old soul. I'm more attracted to older people than people my age. Not only do I think they're attractive, but I also think they're more interesting. I really like your whole attitude about accepting the process of aging, but still taking care of yourself. We are all going to age, it's only natural. We're meant to age, not stay young.

    "Yes, as we age, our structure does change. But with aging also comes valuable experiences, an acquired wisdom, and a beauty that is only attained through the process of aging."

    My feelings as well.

    Exceptional post! Thanks for sharing it.

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  20. You too, Daniel? You and I must be kindred spirits!

    "Not only do I think they're attractive, but I also think they're more interesting."

    OMG, me too! Even as a kid my mother would always say to me when we were at a family gathering or some kind of party, "Ronnie, why don't you go outside and mingle with the kids instead of hanging out inside with us grownups?" And my answer always was, "Because they're BORING." HA!

    I always found hanging around older people so fascinating because I loved listening to their stories and looking at their aged faces.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your outlook about aging, my friend. Have a great weekend!

    X

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  21. First, Ron, belated Happy Birthday wishes from me as well. That number was a very good year. I recall passing it a few years back and early in the new year will mark another birthday too. But, no worries because as you wisely said, aging is inevitable and fretting about it won't make you younger, just worrisome and most likely even older.

    Longevity runs in my family, thankfully, as my late mother died several years ago this month ag age 93 and her father reached a couple of years older than that, so I figure I have time left (whew).

    While I have never heard people say they wish they were older, except perhaps those much younger who can't wait to be able to drive, drink, date, etc., there is nothing "wrong" with acting young in thoughts and even actions and it may even be helpful. That's what we believe and why we still like toys (you've seen our holiday decos, right?) silly movies, blowing bubbles, laughing and hanging out with folks older than ourselves so we are way younger. I walk weekly to several ladies in their late 80s and early 90s and they are the most inspiring to myself.

    By the way, I also prefer older buildings because as we all know they just don't make them like that anymore. Sadly, true with many things (including ourselves).

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  22. http://ladyfi.wordpress.comDecember 12, 2020

    You are fabulous! Thank you for this. Just turned 61 and this resonates with me.

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  23. Hello there, D!

    LOVED your comment!!!! And thank you! My birthday seemed to come up so fast this year that I literally forgot. LOL!

    You have birthday coming up? That awesome!!! And yes, so you completely understand what I mean when I say that aging is inevitable and fretting about it won't make you younger.

    "Longevity runs in my family, thankfully, as my late mother died several years ago this month ag age 93 and her father reached a couple of years older than that, so I figure I have time left (whew)."


    WOW...longevity does run in your family. That's such a blessing! My family as well. I think it's the "Italian" in us and all that pasta and garlic. HA!

    "there is nothing "wrong" with acting young in thoughts and even actions and it may even be helpful. That's what we believe and why we still like toys (you've seen our holiday decos, right?) silly movies, blowing bubbles, laughing and hanging out with folks older than ourselves so we are way younger. "

    I couldn't agree with you more about all of that. And please understand that just because I couldn't wait to get older, doesn't mean I didn't enjoy certain aspects of being young. Also, I strongly believe in keeping a "childlike quality" because it's what keeps you curious, active, and silly. And it's so funny that you mentioned "blowing bubbles" because, OMG, I LOVE doing that too! It's ironic because even though I'm 65, many people think I'm younger because of how silly I act!

    And yes, I had a feeling you liked older building as well. Particularly because of the area where you live. I've mentioned several times in my comment on your posts that I LOVE the architecture where you live. It's stunning!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your thoughts, feelings, and insight on this post. You've added much!

    Enjoy your weekend!

    X

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  24. Aw...thank you, Fiona!

    I remember when I started in 60's and was so looking forward to it. Life seems to getting better and better with age because you don't worry about things as much. There is a wonderful kind of freedom that comes with aging.

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend! Have a faaaaaaabulous weekend!

    X

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  25. You have a wonderful attitude about aging and a keen ability to accept the inevitability of it all, Ron. Good for you! I wouldn't mind aging so much if it weren't associated with mortality! Like you, I've had a few medical issues over the years, but they actually helped make me stronger and healthier. I would just like to ride that wave as long as I can.

    Happy belated birthday. Have a faaaaaabulous weekend!

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  26. Hey there Mark!

    Thank you. But that's what aging has taught me. So, I have "age" to thank for that. HA!

    " I wouldn't mind aging so much if it weren't associated with mortality!"

    I know what you mean because I think of that too. It's like realizing we all have an expiration date. LOL!

    "'I've had a few medical issues over the years, but they actually helped make me stronger and healthier. I would just like to ride that wave as long as I can."

    Yes, I remember that. And it wasn't long afterwards (maybe a few years) when I had my scary medical issue and spent TWO freaking weeks in the hospital. YIKES!

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. And thanks for the Happy Birthday wish!

    Have a faaaaaaaaabulous rest of your weekend!

    X to you and Tara

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