My stepmother grew to be an outstanding cook. And this was a woman, who at the young age of 21, married my 45-year-old father (with three children) and knew nothing about cooking. She was raised in a family with three older brothers, so she was more of a tomboy than a Betty Crocker or Martha Stewart-type girl. She married into my family, who were your typical Moonstruck Italians, where cooking and eating were about as crucial to them as turning "tricks" are to a prostitute.
I’m sure the first question out of my relative's mouths when my father told them that he had asked my mother to marry him was, “But Frank....CAN SHE COOK?” My mother was honest with my father before she married him and said that she knew nothing about cooking, cleaning, or raising children because she was just a child herself. However, she ended up surprising the hell out of herself and my family because she quickly discovered that she was born with a natural ability to not only cook but also maintain a brilliant household. And I’m not just saying this because she was my mother, but she made Suzy Homemaker look like a novice.
Our home always felt comfortable, relaxed, welcoming, and looked spotlessly clean! I am extremely blessed and proud to have had her as my second mother. I never realized this until I got a bit older and began looking back on my childhood, seeing the positive impact she had on my life.
Anyway, getting back to my mother's cooking….
She was one of those people who never followed recipes as they were written but rather took the basic formula and added her twist. She instinctively knew what to add and subtract, creating a culinary masterpiece. She was like an artist - raw and intuitive. And as far as her Italian cooking went, her marinara sauce was so good that it even impressed my father's mother who was extremely critical of Italian food.
Our Thanksgiving Day dinner was always a feast - a cornucopia of soup to nuts. We inevitably ended up having so much food left over that we could eat turkey, dressing, and all the various side dish ancillaries for the next several days. And speaking of turkey, the bird came out of the oven so tender and juicy that it melted in your mouth.
However. And this was a TRADITIONAL, however...
When it came to the dinner rolls my mother always forgot they were in the oven, therefore about six minutes after sitting down at the table and saying grace, the aroma of scorched rolls came drifting from the kitchen into the dining room. Whereupon she'd quietly scream, “OH, DAMN.…I FORGOT THE DINNER ROLLS!!!!!”
She would JUMP up from the table and RUN to the oven door, throw it open, as a large cloud of black smoke came bellowing out like the burning of Atlanta. At which point she would turn on the overhead exhaust fan, which sucked out all the smoke before the fire department ever got there.
God love her!
And I can still remember her bringing those poor little burnt dinner rolls to the table and telling us to eat them anyway because charcoal is good for cleaning your teeth….
I would like to conclude this post with a photograph I found in a box of family photos. Center, is my mother as a young girl standing in front of her home on Woodstock Street in Germantown, Philadelphia. My mother adored animals. Notice the small kitten she's holding and the cheesy smile on her face. Also, notice the expression on the faces of her girlfriends standing on either side.
Don't you just love old film photographs? No filters, no editing, just spontaneous images...
💟 I miss you and your burnt dinner rolls! 💟
Have a fabulous week, everyone! And Happy Pre-Thanksgiving Day!
💗
Hola Denise!
ReplyDeleteThat's the first thing that popped into my head, the family in the movie, Moonstruck. And I kid you not, my Italian family was SO MUCH like them. They would screaming at each other one minute, the next they'd be kissing each other. And all while EATING dinner. LOL!
Yes, I did love her. She was never a stepmother to me. It was as if she and I were blood relatives. We used to joke about how we knew each other in a past life because we instantly became friends.
Thank you. Every so often I will rewatch that video. It's so hard for me to fathom that she passed away 11 years ago.
Yup, she did that ever single Thanksgiving, without fail. It was a running joke in my family.
Isn't that photo priceless? I found it a few days ago.
Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend! Hope you're having a fantastic week!
X
" and telling us to eat them anyway because charcoal is good for cleaning your teeth " - Hysterical! But she was right because I currently use a toothpaste (Crest) that has charcoal in it. It was as if she was seeing into the future. LOL!
ReplyDeleteVERY funny story, Ron!
And that photograph? Stellar! Look at the way people dressed back then. Everyone looked special. I love old photos too. They were raw and real. As much as I enjoy Instagram, so much of it has turned into people adding filters and editing their pictures in order for them to look "perfect". You have to constantly wonder if their real or fake.
Fun memory post, Ron!
P.S. By the way, do you have plans for Thanksgiving Day?
Hey there, Daniel!
ReplyDelete"But she was right because I currently use a toothpaste (Crest) that has charcoal in it. It was as if she was seeing into the future. LOL!"
OMG you are soooooooooooo right! And I've seen that toothpaste on the shelf at Target and CVS! Yup, she was psychic. Ha!
I know, I know, don't you just love how people dressed back then? Everyone looked so put together and special. And you're right, so much of Instagram is about filters and editing so that you can't tell what's real or what's fake. And what really annoys me is that some people have Instagram accounts where they edit and use filters on vintage movie star photographs and it makes them looks so fake. Some even colorize black and white photos. Ewwwwwwwww!
I enjoy having a laid-back Thanksgiving Day and prefer spending it quietly because I'm in retail and the following day is Black Friday (insanity). I have movies that I like to watch that day (Miracle of 34th Street and The Wizard of Oz). I will usually go to the park and feed the squirrels. I also call a few friends and my brother to wish them a Happy Thanksgiving. And then have dinner.
Thanks so much for stopping by, Daniel! Have a faaaaaaabulous rest of your week!
X
Oh my god Ron, that photo of your mother and her friends is so precious! And I totally agree, old film photos were the best. So many of the photographs today go way beyond digital editing and filters. Digital photography definitely has advantages, but I think people take it too far to the point of the photograph not being what the image actually looks like in real life.
ReplyDeleteI'm going to share this post with my friend because she told me a story about her aunt burning the dinner rolls during holiday family gatherings. She is going to get such a kick out of this!!!!
Your mother sounded like such a special lady. The way you talk about her makes me wish I had met her.
And wow, she was only 21 when she married your father who was 45?!? Did they ever have any children between them?
I can't believe Thanksgiving is only nine days away!? xo
Hello there, Abby!
ReplyDeleteIsn't that photo so dang cute? I love each one of their facial expressions! And my mother looks like she's the leader of the pack with that cheesy smile, as if to say, "Aren't my kitten and I just the CUTEST!?"
Yes, digital photography DEFINITELY has some great advantages. However, photography has gotten so "technical" and "special effects" that something seems to be missing because you're being distracted by all the "technical" and "special effects".
"I'm going to share this post with my friend because she told me a story about her aunt burning the dinner rolls during holiday family gatherings. "
You're kidding me! For real??? I thought my mother was the only one who traditionally burnt dinner rolls LOL!!!
Yes, my father and stepmother had one child (my younger brother) between them. I know, can you believe the age difference? But hey, for them, it totally worked out. Many of my family members thought that their marriage wouldn't last. But what's ironic is that their marriages didn't last.
I know, only 9 days away! And then soon after that....CHRISTMAS!
Thanks for stopping by, Abby. Have a great rest of your week!
X
That's right, Ron, I forgot you are in retail and that Black Friday is the next day. Yikes! No wonder you enjoy spending Thanksgiving Day quietly. I would too.
ReplyDeleteYour day sounds perfect! Do you watch the original Miracle on 34th Street with young Natalie Wood?
The one positive thing about working in a city store on Black Friday is that many of the city folk drive out to the burbs and do their shopping in malls because all the sales are under one roof. We are usually more busy the day after Black Friday.
ReplyDeleteOf course! The one with Natalie Wood is a classic!
Ron, this cracked me up ------- "as a large cloud of black smoke came bellowing out like the burning of Atlanta". LOL!
ReplyDelete"Frankly my dear, I don't give a damn". Did a get the right reference?
I think you should write a memoir of all your childhood memories because all the ones you've shared here on you blog are very entertaining.
Your stepmother sounded like such a special gem. Isn't it something about Italians and their prerequisite "cooking rule " about marrying into their family? Kudos to your mother for coming in (especially at such a young age) and impressing the hell out of your grandmother with her natural cooking and homemaker skills.
LOVE that black and white photo! I'm a cat lover myself. xo
Good Moring, Candice!
ReplyDelete*clapping*
Yes, you most certainly did get the right reference!!! Don't you love that movie? I have it on DVD.
"Isn't it something about Italians and their prerequisite "cooking rule " about marrying into their family? Kudos to your mother for coming in (especially at such a young age) and impressing the hell out of your grandmother with her natural cooking and homemaker skills."
You got that right! My family was very tough on my stepmother upon entering our family. And it makes me so happy that she impressed the hell out of them; particularly my father's mother (who was extremely critical).
I'm a cat lover too! But I love dogs as well. However, I prefer cats as a roommate. Cats and dogs have a completely different energy. My mother (being an animal lover) taught us to respect ALL animals.
Thanks so much for stopping by, Candice! Have a great day and rest of your week!
X
It's just as well, Ron. I was not a fan of the remake for many reasons. That movie should be experienced in black and white.
ReplyDeleteI have a feeling I would feel the same as you. I don't like remakes or reboots. Some things should be left "as is".
ReplyDeleteThat’s a good memory, Ron. I’ve burnt a few rolls in my time. I have to set the timer or I will always forget them. I’m cracking up that she told you guys that charcoal was good for your teeth, now that the charcoal toothpaste is all the rage! How did she know that back then??
ReplyDeleteWhat an adorable photo of your mom. Did you ever get to know her parents or siblings? I don’t remember you ever mentioning them.
I’m off to do my pre-Thanksgiving shopping. It’s not my favorite holiday, but my husband and kids enjoy it tremendously. I hope you have a wonderful week with some foods you enjoy. XO
Gooooooooood morning, my friend!
ReplyDelete"I have to set the timer or I will always forget them."
Yes, at that is something she also tried to do but she would always FORGET to set the timer, thus...burnt rolls. LOL!
" I’m cracking up that she told you guys that charcoal was good for your teeth, now that the charcoal toothpaste is all the rage! How did she know that back then??"
HA! I know, isn't that something? And someone else mentioned that in their comment as well. Who KNEW back then? SHE did!
"Did you ever get to know her parents or siblings? I don’t remember you ever mentioning them."
Yes, absolutely! In fact, I felt closer to her family (mother, father and siblings) than I did to my father's side. Her family was all very caring and loving to my siblings and I. You gave me an idea for a future post. I may share a post (with photos) of her side of the family.
I was in Trader Joe's yesterday to pick up a few things for a soup I'm going to make tonight and noticed all the Thanksgiving items on the shelves. I will be going back sometime next week to pick up some for myself.
Thanks so much for stopping by! Happy pre-Thanksgiving shopping!
X
Ron, your stepmom must've been quite a lady! At the tender age of 21 to have married a guy with three kids and to have learned all the ins and outs of rearing children, maintaining a home and a marriage, and growing up herself -- makes my head spin!!
ReplyDeleteLoved your story about the dinner rolls. I guess it's better to burn them than to burn the turkey, huh? Good for her, coming up with a reason for you all to dig in anyway!
What a great photo ... and I do love the saucy look her friend is giving her. Makes me think they shared a secret before the shutter clicked!
Happy early Thanksgiving to you -- don't work too hard now! xx
Yes, she sure was, Debbie!
ReplyDelete"At the tender age of 21 to have married a guy with three kids and to have learned all the ins and outs of rearing children, maintaining a home and a marriage, and growing up herself -- makes my head spin!!"
I know, right? Mine too! And my father's side of the family put forth no effort to openly welcome her into the family, which made it even more challenging for her. But she showed them and became the best wife and mother ever!
" I guess it's better to burn them than to burn the turkey, huh? Good for her, coming up with a reason for you all to dig in anyway!"
Yes, you're right. Better the rolls than the turkey. Which, as I said, was always perfectly cooked. She used to cook Butterball turkeys. And her stuffing was delicious too!
" I do love the saucy look her friend is giving her. Makes me think they shared a secret before the shutter clicked!"
LOL! It does, you're absolutely right! And perhaps they did. I think I remember my mother saying that they were neighborhood kids.
Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend! Have a terrific rest of your week!
X
This made me laugh so hard. My mom often forgets the dinner rolls. In fact, I usually bring them (frozen), but we always say we're having rolls for dessert because we threw them in at the last minute! 🤣
ReplyDelete"I miss you and your burnt dinner rolls." I know you do, dear friend. 😘
My mom is also an animal lover, and I think she and your mother would have gotten along well. Maybe that's why you and I get along. Maybe I'll burn the rolls on purpose for your mother next week. ❤️
I love it when you share these posts, my friend. Your stories keep them alive. xoxo
Hellooooooooo there, Kari!
ReplyDelete"My mom often forgets the dinner rolls. In fact, I usually bring them (frozen), but we always say we're having rolls for dessert because we threw them in at the last minute! 🤣"
Bwhahahhahahahahaha! That is too funny! My mother used to use those Pillsbury Ready-to-Bake Dinner Rolls that you would open by smacking the tube against the kitchen counter. Once cracked open, you would then put the rolls on a oven tray and bake. Or in my mother case...BURN! LOL!
"My mom is also an animal lover, and I think she and your mother would have gotten along well. Maybe that's why you and I get along. Maybe I'll burn the rolls on purpose for your mother next week. ❤️"
Yes, I think they would have too! And I was thinking the same thing, that's why you and I get along. Maybe we're siblings!
My mother taught us to respect all animals. Our home was filled with all kinds of pets (dogs, cats, fish, turtles, ducks, hamsters, and bunny rabbits) I kid you not!
Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Hope you're having a fantabulous week! LOVED your last post!
X
Ron, dude, for as long as I've been reading your blog (like 10 years or more ), no one can tell a story like you! And I can't believe you haven't ever told this one. HILARIOUS! My girlfriend actually read it first because she was home today. I got a text from her around lunchtime that instructed me to read it. I LOL at my desk!
ReplyDeleteBut it was not only funny, touching as well. Whenever you speak of your stepmother, the love is so evident through your words. As Denise said, I remember the post you shared as a tribute to her after she passed. It was so beautiful.
LOVE the photo of your mom and her girls. It almost looks like they are each wearing the same exact coat, socks and shoes. Was it their school uniform?
" It almost looks like they are each wearing the same exact coat, socks and shoes. Was it their school uniform?"
ReplyDeleteDo you know what, Matt? I NEVER EVEN NOTICED THAT BEFORE!?!? You might be right about that. Now it's got me so curious to know if it was their school uniforms and attended they were classmates. Good call, Matt. And thanks for noticing that!
"Whenever you speak of your stepmother, the love is so evident through your words. As Denise said, I remember the post you shared as a tribute to her after she passed. It was so beautiful."
Thank you. And it's so hard for me to fathom that it's been 11 years. It feels like it was only yesterday.
Much thanks for stopping by, buddy. Hope you're having a most excellent week!
X
Ron, I like what you said about preferring cats as a roommate. I feel that way as well. And you're right, cats and dogs have a completely different energy. Cats are also low maintenance.
ReplyDeleteYES! Cats are very low maintenance, correct! When I was living in Florida, I had two cats (mother and son) and I loved that I could go away for a few days and leave them food and water (and their litter box) and not have to worry.
ReplyDeleteRon, I like what you said about preferring cats as a roommate. I feel that way too. And you're right, cats and dogs have a completely different energy. Cats are also low maintenance.
ReplyDeleteRon, I like what you said about preferring cats as a roommate. I feel that way too. You're right, cats and dogs have a completely different energy. Cats are also low maintenance.
ReplyDeleteRon, I like what you said about preferring cats as a roommate. I feel that way too. You're right, cats and dogs have a completely different energy. Cats are also lower maintenance.
ReplyDeleteRon, I feel that way too. I prefer cats as roommates. You're right, cats and dogs have a completely different energy. Cats are also lower maintenance.
ReplyDeleteHey there, Elaine!
ReplyDelete"Most Italians are so critical of their food genre and claim that THEIRS is the best! LOL!"
Ha! You got that right! It's funny because my grandmothers for each side both thought that their marinara sauce and meatballs was the best.
One thing I didn't mention in this post was how delicious my father's meatballs were. He would fry them in a cast iron skillet until the exteriors were crispy, so that when you bit down on them, they would crunch. But the interiors were so tender. I don't know how he did it, buy they were pure perfection every single time, No one made meatballs like him!
" At least me with, I had my kids one at a time and learned about parenting and homecare gradually. For you, your siblings, and she, I'm sure you all leaned to adjust. And when you speak of her, you can feel your love and admiration."
Yes, it was an adjustment, for sure. And yes, I did admire and love her. She was a very special human. I miss her.
I know, can you believe that Thanksgiving is just around the corner? I LOVE this time of year!
Thanks so much for stopping by, Elaine! Have a fabulous weekend!
X
Yes! Cats are much lower maintenance. You can go away for several days and not have to worry. Just leave food and water and you're good to go! 🐈🐱
ReplyDeleteRon, regardless of burning the dinner rolls, you stepmother sounded like a very special woman. Wow, to marry that young, particularly a man in his 40s with three children, makes her even more special. Like you said, she had a natural instinct for homemaking and cooking.
ReplyDeleteLove the vintage photograph! Their outfits are so cute. I love how females back then all wore hats. And so did the men.
Oh, the good old days!
Thanks for sharing, Ron. Warmed my heart. Have a great Thanksgiving! xoxo
Clair, thank you so much for your sweet words about my stepmother. Yes, she WAS a special lady. She was someone who I could shared all things with and felt totally comfortable. And her love for animals rubbed off on me because I too love them.
ReplyDelete" Their outfits are so cute. I love how females back then all wore hats. And so did the men."
Don't you just love the way people dressed back then? Everyone (adults and children) all looked so neat, clean, and sharp. As a kid, I remember my father teaching me how to polish my dress shoes. He was so OCD about shiny shoes. Which, made me the same! LOL!
Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Hope you're having a fantastic weekend!
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