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Gee whiz…

I haven’t shared a vent about cell phones for some time now, so I think one is due.

For those of you who have just recently started reading this blog, may not be aware of my torrid love affair with cell phones.

Let’s just say that I love cell phones about as much as I love the Estee Lauder women’s fragrance, Youth Dew.

And if you’ve never experienced this fragrance before, just close your eyes and try to imagine what SATAN would smell like.

However, let my clarify by saying that it’s not cell phones I dislike, but rather the compulsive and addictive manner in which many people use them.

I’ve often wondered how these people ever managed to inhale and exhale before cell phones were ever invented.

I recently had a young gentlemen, when discovering that I didn’t own a cell phone, screamed at me, “HOW CAN YOU NOT HAVE A CELL PHONE, DUDE?”

I said, “It’s easy…because it’s not a necessity in my life, therefore I don‘t need one”

He then said, “Look, dude…to live properly, a cell phone IS a necessity.”

I guess cell phones have become a necessary life sustenance, which apparently I’ve been minus.

No wonder I feel so unnecessarily lifeless.


I won’t even go into how I think cell phones should be forbidden while driving a car. I myself, have almost been hit several times by a moving vehicle while the driver was busy talking on the phone. And one time it was by a cab driver.

Another place I feel a cell phone has no business being is while on the job.

I don’t know whether you’ve noticed lately, but it’s becoming more and more of a common practice for employees to be walking around the job, chatting their little hearts out while getting paid to work.

It’s one thing to use a cell phone during a lunch break, or perhaps if someone may be expecting a call about an emergency situation, but to be talking to a friend about personal stuff while customers are waiting to be serviced is totally unprofessional.

And I would like to know how this practice suddenly BECAME professional?

I’m sorry…but work is work. And talking to a friend on a cell phone is your time off.

I can’t tell you how many times I’ve gone into a store when a cashier was deliciously enthralled with their cell phone conversation, where I actually felt like I was inconveniencing them by asking them to ring up my sale. In fact, not too long ago I had an employee complete an entire sales transaction without ever looking at me or saying one word - not so much as a hello, thank you, or a good-bye.

Is it just me, or am I the ONLY person on this planet who feels the need to take someone’s cell phone and place in a nice, tight, dark spot?…..


  1. good eve, my dear darling....i do deeply apologize and kowtow to you for not coming around last week and leaving my thoughts on your posts....i shall catch up this week, it's a promise i can "almost" make i think...

    this is so true and i too hate the damned things excepting the two times in my life when i needed one in an emergency and didn't have it and couldnt find a pay phone anywhere...i mean NO WHERE!! so, in that case but otherwise they are a despicable part of life nowadays, of which I won't partake and if someone won't put their's down and wait on me, well, guess what, i take my busyness elsewhere...i refuse to be treated rudely for some idiot teenager who can't be released from their ego induced conversation for the few minutes it takes to wait on the likes of someone like me...believe me, i want out of there as fast as they obviously want me out...! is going down the tubes for people like us, dear ron...some day you may have to move here and live with me because you will likely go nuts living in the city with all those crazies with cells hanging off their ears for jewelry and God knows what and where else....i shudder to think frankly and am daily giving thanks for living far from humanity and it's lovely nuances and modernity....

    much love and hugs and kisses to you, dear one...

  2. Well missy...listen here...get that cell outta my ass or where ever that photo was taken. It's hurting me and because I left it on vibrate I'm well getting much to much excited...'THE HILLS ARE ALIVE WITH THE SOUND OF MUSIC' Shut up you snot nosed green curtain dressed pukes.

    I couldn't live without mine and I don't care where it's stuck or put. But I do know, well sometimes when to use it and when not to. And driving the bus here, when someone gets on, jabbering away on the cell, puts the money in and then sticks there hand out for a transfer I IGNORE IGNORE IGNORE...Get off that damn cell and politely ask me you mealy mouthed slut. Go get 'em Joan...I'll hand ya the wire hangers..."Over the river and through the woods" Ooops...I'll save that one for later :)

    Aloha...christ is that what talking on my cell and trying to type a comment does...this comment just makes absolutely no sense to me

  3. NO, Just yesterday I was waiting to park my car and a guy got into his car to leave, I thought yes, a parking spot, but then the guy didn't leave. Instead he cracked on his crackberry and did this for 5 effing minutes....I was waiting for his spot! A line formed and people were honking and he just smiled and waived. Jerk!

  4. It IS banned here while driving, since July 1st, $72 fine or something, but I see DUMBASSES still DRIVING AND HOLDING at the same time. I want it raised to an even $100. Let that extra $$ go into bringing back the written test renewal for drivers license.
    I swear ever since they did away with it, it's every driver for themself, with donkeys making up their own rules. Get a mini eye check, hand em your renewal fee, take your mugshot, and BAM...insty license!
    Oh what were we talking about again? Oh yeah, cell phones. I absolutely *HATE HATE HATE* it when people come in with the phone glued to their ear, and you acknowledge them, but they totally ignore you and continue to talk on the phone the whole time and walk out. Very rude. You have no choice but to hear every word of their stupid conversations. Or the ones that just stand there going through the pictures on their jesus phone: click, click, click, click, click, click,
    (rolling eyes)

  5. BRAVO on this vent!!!
    I do have a cell phone but try to not be totally obnoxious with it. I don't drive with it on, unless it's hubby and I can put him on speaker phone... but here in NJ I think that even might be illegal now.
    It really does show a terrible lack of courtesy in general to be just gabbing and gabbing away constantly in public and employees who use them on company time while there are customers waiting should be reprimanded by atleast loss of a days pay or something.
    Sure, there are times I've chatted on mine, like at my table at Barnes or something, but I just try to not be too loud or rude about it.

    I'm glad there are still people like you who aren't slaves to technology. We have begun to lose something valuable in our society because of these advances. They are great for some situations, especially emergencies, but they are so freaking impersonal too.
    So good for you to be standing strong on this issue.

    Have a wonderful week my friendly neighbor.
    And again, thanks soooo much for posting the review of my Etsy page. You are kind and wonderful. Big HUG.

  6. Completely agree. However, I do enjoy my Iphone but keep it under wraps in inappropriate situations. Loved the comment about the Estee Lauder perfume!!! Completely cracked me up as I almost spit out my coffee. Now I know what Satan smells like if he ever comes calling.

  7. Nope--you're not the only one.

    And since I'm the boss....the rule is no cellphones unless approved by me/the supervisor because of some emergency.
    And thankfully I have employees that abide by that.

    The darn things irritate me beyond belief..

  8. Good Morning Linda!

    No apologies needed, dear lady. I absolutely understand. Hope you're feeling better! I sent you some Reiki yesterday - hope ya felt it.

    Doesn't inappropriate cell phone use drive you insane??

    Cell phones definitely have a positive side to them, but what I'm talking about in this post is the excess.

    OMG...when you live in a city, you see so much cell phone usage because you're always right out there in the streets with TONS people all day long.

    Oy chee mamba!

    Thanks for dropping by today, Linda!

    It's so wonderful seeing ya!

    Love and "energy" to you!!!!


    Take care

  9. Aloha Thom!


    It was a potpourri of HYSTERICS!!

    And "The Hills are Alive" reference CRACKED me the hell up!!

    Is your cell phone really set on that ring tone? about cell phones on buses...

    ...I once took a bus trip to the Pocono Mountains and one of the passagers was talking SO LOUD on her cell phone that the bus drive got on the intercom and asked her to STOP. Well...she didn't. So when we got to the bus station he made her WAIT, by taking everyone else's luggage out first; making her LAST!!

    Everyone applauded him!


    Actually, I use to have a cell phone, and my favorite thing to do was to put it on vibrate and then place it in my pant pocket (close to my crotch) and then CALL myself over and over again - it was lovely.


    ALWAYS great sharing with ya, buddy!

    Thanks SO MUCH for stopping by!


  10. Morning Funny Girl!



    OMG...I bet you fantasized about RAMMING your car into his!?

    *and then waiving at him

    What a JERK is right!

    Thanks for dropping by, FG!

    Have a great Monday!

  11. It is infuriating I agree.

    I cannot understand the mentality of people who use their phont whilst driving - totally insane!!!

  12. Aloha Debi!


    Because I can't even begin to tell you how irriating it is to have customers come into the store and ingore me when I ask if they need assistance. And then SUDDENLY when they get off the phone, they immediately cop an attitude because I didn't run over to them fast enough.

    I have a new rule at work.

    I REFUSE to even approach a customer any longer if they're on a cell phone. I act like they're not even there.


    In Florida it's illegal to drive and use a cell phone, however, here in Philly it's not. But you're right, because people do it anyway.

    Thanks for dropping by, my retail friend!

    Retailers UNITE!!!!

    Have a great day, Deb!

  13. Morning Crystal Chick!

    Your comment expressed EXACTLY what I meant in sharing this post.

    So, thank you!

    There is a time and place for cell phones. They come in VERY handy sometimes. It's only the excess that irritates me. I use to own a cell phone. In fact, when I lived in Florida for a time, that's ALL I had - I didn't have a landline phone.

    You're right...I think it is illegal to drive and use a cell phone in Jersey. I work with several people who train-commute from Jersey.

    Oh, and you're SO welcome about the review, M! It was a pleasure. I'll be doing a review on ALL my Itsy Stars within the next month. I'm so proud of you ladies!

    Always great seeing ya, neighbor!

    Have a great week!

  14. Hiya Jen! yourself a favor and the next time you're in a department store, take yourself over to the Estee Lauder counter and ask to smell Youth Dew.

    (just make sure you haven't eaten anything prior)


    The scent always reminds me of my hateful grandmother. She was the spawn of Satan!

    Aren't Iphones GREAT? My god, not only can you talk, but also google the web!

    Thanks for dropping by, Jen!

    Always enjoyed!

  15. You GO...Mel!!!!

    I think it must be a "Libra thing" because when I managed a retail store, I TOO enforced the same rule.

    I did not want to lose customers because my employees were too busy talking on the phone and ignoring them. That is just POOR customer service - Amen!

    GREAT seeing ya, dear lady!

    You ROCK!

    Happy Monday to ya!

  16. Afternoon Akelamalu!


    Above all the things that I find ridiculous about cell phone's the driving while talking that infuriates me the most.

    It jeopardizes the safety of others.

    Thanks for dropping by, m'dear!

    Have a GREAT day!

  17. Well in Hawai'i as Deb so appropriately pointed out as of July 1 we can use ours while driving. So ya know what I did? Went out an bought a car with the micro soft sync system in it so I can totally use mine hands free. Hows them apples...And hell now it's not my ringtone...But a secret between you and me...It's


    Go figure

  18. Aloha Thom/Miss Merman! boss needs to get one of those cars! The last time we drove back from NYC, she was talking on the phone while driving in a RAIN STORM at night! We almost ended up slamming into a truck in front of us!

    I almost SHIT!


    Anway, glad to hear you at least can drive without having to hold the phone.

    Because remember something very important....


    Go Ethel...GO!

  19. No, you are NOT the only one who wants to put these where the sun don't shine. I only got one a few years ago and I use it for work more than anything else.

    A few years ago, I had JUST changed from my temp tags to my plates on my new car when a young kid sideswiped me while he was on his phone. The police wanted us to each explain what happened but I was so pissed off, they made me go sick in my car to calm down.

  20. Shh, don't tell. There are many of us out here who don't need or want a cell phone.

    I never want to have to be that connected. If you really need to talk to me you can find me (easily) without me having a cell!

    And that's just what they are this little jail cell that some people won't disconnect from.

    But then, if I could get away with it, I wouldn't even have a house phone!


  21. Hi Chrissy!

    See!!!...that's exactly what I'm talking about!

    There's no way someone can totally concentrate on driving a vehicle, while talking on a cell phone at the same time.

    No doubt...I would have been EQUALLY as pissed as you, my friend!

    And what really freaks me out are the people who text message while driving!?!?

    Thanks for stopping by, Chrissy!

    Hope your cold is all better!

    Enjoy your evening!

  22. Hi Gigi!

    I LOVE what you shared....

    ...a little jail cell that some people won't disconnect from...

    Yes...I never want to be THAT connected, either. should see me. I hardly ever pick up my home phone when it rings. I always look at the caller ID to see if it's someone I want to talk with, first.

    tee, hee!

    Thank you for dropping by and sharing Gigi!

    Nice seeing ya!

    Hope you're enjoying your summer!

  23. Well, Ron, hopefully when you almost soiled yourself in that rainstorm, you thought to remove your pelvic detritus first, as shown in the x-ray. Or perhaps that's where you hid your boss' phone after almost slamming into the truck. It's doubtful she'd have asked for it back, even if it was ringing.

    As for my cell habits, while I prefer a pocket to my ass, I always keep it switched off unless I need to make an outgoing call. Who the hell wants to be interrupted?

  24. Hey MVD!

    HOLY's so GREAT seeing ya!

    How are ya, bud? I read you got that job. Congrats!

    And of course your comment made me LAUGH my assith-hole off! should have seen me when we almost hit that truck. I slammed my foot on the floor of her car as if I was SLAMMING on the brakes!

    And good boy! At least you use your cell phone considerately.

    Thanks so much for stopping by!

    And please tell NYC I said HI!

  25. Thom:
    It wasn't you driving that got hit on the head in Kalihi, was it??

    Hope you're OK!

  26. Oh hell no. I had some asshole on the treadmill next to me for an hour yesterday loudly talking to his friend about his asshole wife. For an hour. In a public gym. Loud.

  27. Hi Peach Tart~


    Thanks for stopping by and sharing a comment.

    Nice to meet ya!

    I totally know what you mean. Since the invention of the cell phone, we're constantly getting LOUD glimpses into the private lives of others. Don't you love hearing the arguments?


    Please stop by anytime. You're always welcomed!

    Enjoy your day!

  28. Ahhhh...
    so yesterday I'm in home megastore and there's this ol dude talking reeeeeeeeeally loud using a bluetooth.
    I glared at him a couple of times to kind of give him a STFU!! hint, because I didn't want to hear him bitching to whoever he was bitching to about his neighborly dramas.
    He was totally oblivious and wouldn't STFU, and I couldn't take it any more. And went off to another aisle out of earshot-several aisles away. Though I wish I could have somehow went over to the store intercom "will the old dude in the plumbing aisle
    yelling in his bluetooth kindly S..........T..........F.......U!!"

  29. Hi Debi!

    OMG...that would have been FLAWLESS!!!

    But I wonder if he would have STFU anyway?!?!?!


    Hope you had a great day, Deb!

    Thanks for stopping by!

  30. OK, Thom hasn't reported in yet...
    Ground Control to Major Thom...

  31. i hate the phone, freaking cell phones, people act like there is just soooo much to talk about that they have to make a call in the middle of everything. check their phone, be rude. cell phones are taking over. almost everyone i see driving is on the phone.

  32. Aloha Debi! sound just like David Bowie!!!!


  33. Hi Valerie!

    You so brilliantly summed up this post...

    ...there is just soooo much to talk about that they have to make a call in the middle of everything...


    What the hell is everyone talking about???

    Thanks for stopping by, Val!

    Enjoy your day!

  34. Ethel reporting for duty!!! I was so not the one hit on the head in Kalihi...Maybe someplace else but certainly no there.

    "Bang bang, he shot me down
    Bang bang, I hit the ground
    Bang bang, that awful sound
    Bang bang, my baby shot me down"

  35. Aloha Ethel!


    My...aren't you full of SONG today????

    I LOVE IT!!!

    And see, Debi...he DID return to answer your comment!

    Thanks for stopping by again, buddy!

    You ROCK!

  36. relieved! :) I was afraid I'd visit him in the hospital and he'd reenact that scene in "Airplane!" There's no business like show business like no business I---- (then they inject Ethel with a sedative:

    Win one for The Zipper! :)

  37. Hi Ron! Great post. We have a cell phone but we don't use it a whole lot. Just when we are traveling or have a situation. They do come in handy for emergencies.
    But I agree that some people are just obnoxious with them. I hate the texting people. OMG. I shit you not, a couple of months ago, I took the kids to a birthday party that was at a rec center. They rented the pool area out for a private party. There was probably 10-15 kids there, under 10 years old and one lifeguard. Thus said lifeguard said at his post and texted on his phone the whole time. I was so pissed!! He barely even spared a glance at the children. it was bullshit!! I complained. Of course. No sense in that.
    Have a great evening Ron.

  38. Hi Debi!

    You are TOOOOOOO funny!


  39. OMG,'s so great seeing ya, girl!!!

    I've been thinking about you lately, so I'm SOOOOO glad you stopped by!

    I MISS YOU!!!! said it, it's not only the cell phone shit that bothers me, but more so the text messaging at the most inappropriate times.

    I CANNOT believe that lifeguard sat in his chair TEXT MESSAGING!?!?! I would have be furious as a parent!

    Honestly though, I think cell phones are useful and great, but it's excess that really gets to me.

    Thanks soooo much for stopping by, Nicole!

    You TOTALLY made my day!

    Hope you had great 4th of July and are enjoying your summer.

    The weather here has been flawless this year - NO HEAT!



  40. Hell with the zippers...I wear 505's button up.

    OMG could you imagine getting bitched slapped like that in Airplane or having that blow up doll? Just to die for isn't it.
    If only I could talk jive.

    "Its just your jive talkin
    Youre telling me lies, yeah
    Jive talkin
    You wear a disguise
    Jive talkin
    So misunderstood, yeah
    Jive talkin
    You really no good"

    Oh sing it Gibb boys...And leave poor Ethel alone...she's being sedated...

  41. Dearest Ethel!


    How the HELL do you remember the words to all these songs????


  42. "Oh Stewardess...I talk jive!"

  43. No, you're not, bro! I HATE people using cell phones in the supermarket, at work and especially when they are trying to drive!!! I want a cattle prod so I can just zap 'em right in the neck.

    I just think that Ms. Manners needs to get her butt on TV to start teaching common courtesy again.

  44. Hiya Nitebyrd!

    ...I just think that Ms. Manners needs to get her butt on TV to start teaching common courtesy again...

    THANK YOU!!!!!

    *but a cattle prod is an excellent idea too!


    Hope you're having a great night, Sis!


  45. You think Ethel is going to give up her secrets...No never...oooo so someone else jive talks around her I see hmmmm

    Oh from my one and only queen:

    "Mmm mmm
    Something's comin' over, mmm mmm
    Something's comin' over, mmm mmm
    Something's comin' over me
    My baby's got a secret"

  46. Thank you Madonna!