Happiness: Condition Or Sensation?


Earlier last week I watched the delicious documentary, Public Speaking, spotlighting American writer, Fran Lebowitz.

Fran is one of those unique individuals who people either love, or think she’s an arrogant, rude, elitist New Yorker.

Yes, without a doubt Fran speaks her mind with a candidness that’s one-of-a-kind. Her social commentary on American life is to say the least, sardonic, and BRILLIANTLY sardonic. She is definitely not for those people who like things sugarcoated because I'm almost certain Fran drinks her coffee strong, black, and without any sweetener.

Personally, I love her because I appreciate her directness and un-censorship.

But to be honest, I don’t always agree with Fran’s take on things, yet she has one of those personalities that is so enthralling, you can’t turn away from her; regardless of her personal views. Her speaking voice is so identifiable because it sounds like a gravelly Wilma Flintstone who chain smokes. Fran also speaks with a certain rhythm - in Morse code.

One of the questions in the documentary that was asked of Fran was, “Do you prefer being in the company of happy or embittered people?”

Fran’s answer was, “As soon as I meet some happy people I will let you know.”

She also said, “Happiness to me is really a sensation, it is not a condition. So that when people say, are you happy? Yes, I have been happy, but for moments. But the idea that happiness is a condition of life is truly an absurd idea.”

Well, after laughing my ass off at her so-Fran delivery, I had to admit that I did not fully agree with her.

So here’s my own take on happiness….

I can sincerely say that overall I am a happy person, but that doesn’t mean I don’t feel other emotions.

I don’t think it’s possible to ONLY feel happy all the time because as human beings, we feel a gamut of emotions throughout any given day. And like with any contra-happy emotion, such as, annoyance, sorrow, despair or fear, they are not static, they come and go. And I think it’s important to allow ourselves to feel and embrace these emotions because they are there to teach us something. Denying them does not make them go away.

However.

I do think it’s possible to remain a happy person in spite of feeling other emotions.

Happiness is a choice.

And I will give you a brief personal example.

Back in 2003, when I had to file for bankruptcy, my life was in utter shambles because my whole existence fell apart. I had no physical security during this time because everything was taken away from me. I literally had ZERO.

Needless to say, HAPPY was not an emotion I was feeling or even thought about.

But I have to tell you, if it weren’t for going bankrupt, I don’t think I would have ever realized all the things I had to be grateful for in my life, in spite of not having any financial security because I was one of those people who always overlooked those things. I knew I had a great life, but I took it for granted.

Therefore, when I was stripped of everything physical and left barren, that was when I had the opportunity to actually see the wealth in my life.

To have nothing, but to have everything.

So I made a choice to be happy.

And gradually after I changed my outlook, my financial life took a change as well.

Being happy takes constant consciousness because sometimes I have to remember to stand back from the drama of life and focus on the things I am happy for.

This is where I disagree with Fran.

“But the idea that happiness is a condition of life is truly an absurd idea.”

True, the condition of life might not always be happy. But I do not believe that I don’t have a choice to discover happiness, in spite life’s condition.

The choice is mine. I just have to be aware of it.

And allow happy.

Happy Monday everyone!

52 comments

  1. Oh, Ron, what a great post! Happiness is indeed a choice and as one who has struggled with all sorts of negative thoughts, I often find it hard to see the goodness in life. Your bankruptcy experience, while painful, was an important milestone in your life. Yes, we can't feel happy every minute of the day, but we can't allow ourselves to sink into despair either. The choice really is ours. Thanks for posting this, buddy. Have a great week and keep bringing on the happy!

    ReplyDelete
  2. Yes, happiness is a choice and I choose it!

    ReplyDelete
  3. Everyone needs a few setbacks in order to appreciate the good in their lives, because we so take things for granted. I sometimes wonder what happiness is... it can't be a condition otherwise I would feel happy all the time. Not that I'm unhappy, either, I just sort of get on with life without any emotional hangup one way or the other. Happiness comes in flashes, when things happen to make me aware. I know, I'm talking drivel, I should have taken more time to think this through. Anyway, make sure YOU have a happy day.

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hey there Rob~

    "Happiness is indeed a choice and as one who has struggled with all sorts of negative thoughts, I often find it hard to see the goodness in life."

    Yes, as I shared...happiness takes constant conscious, so it's not always easy to see it, especially during a challenging life experience. It's odd, because when I look back on my bankrupt experience, I see it as one of those times in my life that was so rich, and yes...happy.

    "Yes, we can't feel happy every minute of the day, but we can't allow ourselves to sink into despair either."

    Exactly.

    Thanks so much for stopping by, buddy. Have a great and happy week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  5. Hey there Suzi~

    You go, girl!

    (((( You ))))

    Thanks so much for stopping by. Have a terrific week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  6. Helloooooooooo Valerie~

    "Everyone needs a few setbacks in order to appreciate the good in their lives, because we so take things for granted."

    I couldn't agree with you more. It's something how when we do have certain setbacks in life, we are reminded of the good in our lives?

    " I sometimes wonder what happiness is... it can't be a condition otherwise I would feel happy all the time. Not that I'm unhappy, either, I just sort of get on with life without any emotional hangup one way or the other."

    I don't think it's a condition of life because the conditions of life are forever changing. But I do think I can choose to be happy in spite of a challenging life 'condition.'

    " Happiness comes in flashes, when things happen to make me aware."

    Yes...that's what I mean. Being aware/conscious of the happiness in our lives while moving through any life experience or condition.

    Thanks so much for stopping by, dear lady. And no, you weren't talking dribble at all. You made perfect sense!

    Have a happy Monday and week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  7. Ron, this was such an insightful post. I read it twice so that I could absorb it all. You are so correct in saying that life's conditions might not always be happy, but I do have a choice to be happy in spite of them. It seems that it takes a challenge to fully realize and remember that and bring me back to awareness.

    I love Fran too. Brash, bold and blunt, but so much of what she says is true.

    Have a wonderful week, Ron.

    ReplyDelete
  8. Hola Denise~

    "It seems that it takes a challenge to fully realize and remember that and bring me back to awareness."

    Yes, you nailed it! And for me it's just remembering how I discovered happiness in those challenging experiences/conditions, by being grateful for all the great things in my life, that will snap me back into not getting so caught up and feeling unhappy in my everyday little frustrations.

    "Brash, bold and blunt, but so much of what she says is true."

    Oh, I agree. SO MUCH of what she says is true! I can sit and listen to her talk for hours!

    Thanks for stopping by, girl! Have a fantastic week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  9. I too like her and tend to look at life much the same. I don't think happiness is a state of mind but rather a condition that occurs under certain circumstances. I prefer not to look at life as a bowl of cherries because it's not that. It's life.

    That sounds very dismal. However inner peace is achieved by not being conditional upon expectations. I suppose it's about perception.

    Interesting thoughts for a new week, Ron. Thanks for the illuminating post! It was wonderfully written and I appreciate your way of getting the point across. xoxoxo

    ReplyDelete
  10. Linda...I LOVED your comment.....

    "However inner peace is achieved by not being conditional upon expectations. I suppose it's about perception."

    Exactly! And through inner peace....I am happy.

    "I prefer not to look at life as a bowl of cherries because it's not that. It's life."

    You're right...life is not always a bowl of cherries. But it's how I perceive it. So in a way, for me anyway, it is a state of mind.

    Don't you just LOVE Fran???? OMG, she can talk for hours and I would sit and listen to her. I love the way she uses her hands when she talks.

    Thanks a bunch for stopping by, dear friend. Have a wonderful, happy week!

    ((((((((( You )))))))))))

    xoxoxoxoxox

    ReplyDelete
  11. If there's one thing I can't stand, it's sugarcoating! Hell, I don't even like the coating of sugar on the sugar bowl. Damn sugar coating. So I respect people like Fran, who aren't afraid to speak their minds! (Hence my Republicans-suck mini rants as of late). Having said that, I agree 100% with your take on happiness, Ron!

    ReplyDelete
  12. Howdy Mark~

    "If there's one thing I can't stand, it's sugarcoating! Hell, I don't even like the coating of sugar on the sugar bowl. Damn sugar coating."

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! I agree...I'm not one for sugarcoating myself, which is WHY I love Fran so much. I might not always agree with every single thing she says, but I still admire the way she says it. She speaks her mind directly, and without apology.

    Thanks for stopping by, buddy. Have a wonderful week!

    X to you and Tara!

    ReplyDelete
  13. Ron, I saw this documentary back at the beginning of the summer and thought it was wonderful. I like the way Fran speaks her mind. She's definitely direct and extremely candid, but she often says things that most people just think, but would never say out loud.

    Happiness for me is all in my perception. As you stated, the conditions of life are not always happy ones, but I can still be 'internally' a happy person in spite of them. Often it takes a catastrophe in your life to realize this. As you did.

    Really nice post. I enjoy the way you word things.

    ReplyDelete
  14. Fran Lebowitz is THE BEST! May of her quotes are on par with Dorothy Parker. Sharp, brilliant and hysterical. One of her quotes about children has always been a favorite of mine.

    I love your idea that happy is a choice. I think it is, too. The problem is getting through all the crap first. I found there's a mental condition that actually inhibits "happy", I'll be posting about it soon!

    ReplyDelete
  15. Isn't it strange that I think you and she (AND I) agree? LOL I hear her saying that happiness isn't a "situation in respect to the circumstances" (so goes the definition of 'condition')..and to think that it WAS simply a result of the circumstances "would be absurd".

    "Are you happy?" is a question about a 'condition'--kinda like asking "Are you tall?"

    I have happiness in my life--it changes and it's nothing constant because it's 10% of what happens to me (the situation in respect to the circumstances) and 90% my reaction to it (therein enters my choice!). And ya know I don't do FLUFF! If it sucks, it SUCKS....but I choose my attitude in the midst of the sucky stuff too! (thank GOODness!) It's kinda like choosing to be a 'Debbie Downer' when something cool happens. It's all about choices--and NOT the conditions.

    See?! That's why I think ya agree!
    And then there's the 'it's a sensation'. She might have a point there. LOL I rather like the idea -- farrrrrrrrrr better than I like that 'specific, circumstance related' feeling jazz. I might even haffta steal that. "I'm having a 'sensation' and it ain't pretty!" ROFL You know how much I loveeeeeeee that 'feeling' jazz--NOT one iota!

    'Sensation' could work! It's a "generalize 'feeling' that's not attributed to any particular circumstance". (there I go getting into the dictionary again.....LOL) And truly, for me, happy isn't necessarily about a circumstance created 'feeling'.......back to it being a choice!

    So--see how you and she and I agree?!

    *polishing nails*
    Yup.....I'm gooooooooooooood! Hahahahahaha!!

    Yes--I'll step AWAY from the dictionary!!
    ........maybe....... :-/

    ReplyDelete
  16. Hiya Matt~

    So you've seen the documentary too? Isn't it freakin' brilliant? I laughed all the way through it.

    "She's definitely direct and extremely candid, but she often says things that most people just think, but would never say out loud."

    You're absolutely right....she's says things that most people just think, but would NEVER say out loud. That's WHY I love her!

    "Often it takes a catastrophe in your life to realize this. As you did."

    Agree! It took that catastrophe to make me realize this!

    Always great seeing ya, bud. Thank so much for stopping by! Have a grrrrrrreat week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  17. Hiya Nitebyrd~

    "Fran Lebowitz is THE BEST!"

    The BEST!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    " May of her quotes are on par with Dorothy Parker. Sharp, brilliant and hysterical. One of her quotes about children has always been a favorite of mine."

    It's so funny you mentioned that because while doing some research on Fran, I read several articles that said the same thing, that she is on par with Dorothy Parker. I need to read more about Dorothy because I really don't know that much about her.

    " I found there's a mental condition that actually inhibits "happy", I'll be posting about it soon!"

    Excellent! I can't WAIT to read it!

    Thanks a bunch for stopping by, Sis! Have a faaaaaaabulous week!

    X ya!

    ReplyDelete
  18. Hiya Mel~

    LOOOOOOVED your comment!

    And perhaps I took her answer different than how she meant it.

    I really thought she meant that we cannot choose happiness in spite of a SUCKY condition and that the only way we CAN feel happy is that if it's NOT sucky, which to me, is ludicrous because life SUCKS at times. But we DO have a choice to be happy in spite of it.

    Perhaps it's the word 'condition' that I'm stuck on.

    Anyway, I cannot thank you enough for sharing your insightful and detailed take on Fran's answer because you gave me MUCH to ponder!

    (((( You ))))

    Hope you had a wonderful Monday, dearest lady! Have a TERRIFIC week!

    X ya!

    ReplyDelete
  19. Fran Lebowitz is the bomb! You have to appreciate snark and honesty to love and understand Fran, which I do.

    Happiness to me means not having any preconceived ideas about how I feel the conditions of life go for me. If I can have my life turn upside down and still have a sense of inner peace. That's happiness.

    ReplyDelete
  20. Herman TurnipSeptember 10, 2012

    Overly happy people make me sick ;-) Heh....actually, I like being around people who, like me, are imperfect, but happy in their flaws. People who claim to always be happy and to never have a care in the world bore me. Much like the characters in my stories, the further off center a character is the more interesting they tend to me.

    But hey, that's just me.

    ReplyDelete
  21. Hiya Robert~

    "You have to appreciate snark and honesty to love and understand Fran, which I do."

    You said it, buddy! And I do too! Isn't she freakin' brilliant???

    "Happiness to me means not having any preconceived ideas about how I feel the conditions of life go for me. If I can have my life turn upside down and still have a sense of inner peace. That's happiness."

    Amen! THAT'S happiness!

    Thanks for stopping by, buddy. Have a terrific week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  22. Howdy Herman~

    " I like being around people who, like me, are imperfect, but happy in their flaws."

    You said a mouthful of truth....happy in their flaws! That's to me, is true and sincere happiness.

    "People who claim to always be happy and to never have a care in the world bore me."

    Usually people who claim to ALWAYS be happy I'm always leery of because I don't think it's possible. The people I like to be around are people who show everything.

    The point of this post is to say that we can't ALWAYS feel happy, but we CAN discover some happiness when life's conditions are not always perfect. Or in other words....when it's flawed.

    Always great to see ya, buddy. Hope you had a great Monday!

    Freakin' LOVED your 5-Minute Fiction today!

    X to you, Karin, and Mr. Tyler!

    ReplyDelete
  23. Happiness is somewhere deep inside us, we can seek and find it thus it is more of a choice. It is about the path we choose to walk our life. However, life is not solely about joy and happiness. Sooner or later, we face difficult situation, sadness and sorrow. We walk through the storm and emerge stronger and better. A happier person might deal with and walk through the storm of life much easier.

    ReplyDelete
  24. Agreed Ron. ONE HUNDRED PERCENT!! It IS a choice!! One must choose to be happy. I'm sorry that you had to go through all of that misery. I am also so very thankful that we have "met" and are blog friends...we can commiserate on just about anything!! Glad things are looking up for you, my friend!! xo
    Jeanne

    ReplyDelete
  25. Dianne WilsonSeptember 11, 2012

    I adore Fran
    She's my kind of gal although I must admit I think it would be exhausting to be around her all the time

    I think happiness is one of many emotions that pass through us if we're open
    I'm most happy when I'm with Hope yet in those times I also experience moments of nostalgia, regret, loss

    I like to think that we are either open or closed
    open to all around us and willing to accept and be
    or closed and existing in our own stew

    ReplyDelete
  26. I agree that you can choose to be happy. I know people who choose to spend their lives in a negative state, seeing the worst in every situation. Mo and I lived through a very dark time in our lives, which also ended in bankruptcy. Yet with an attitude of 'We will overcome it', we did and nothing will ever take us to that place again. We choose to be happy!

    Well said Ron! Happiness is a state of mind, available to all if they choose it.

    ReplyDelete
  27. Greetings Zunnur~

    I don't think I could have explained it ANY better than you just did in your comment.

    " However, life is not solely about joy and happiness. Sooner or later, we face difficult situation, sadness and sorrow. We walk through the storm and emerge stronger and better. A happier person might deal with and walk through the storm of life much easier."

    Thank you. Wonderfully stated.

    I agree, life is not solely about joy and happiness. We need to experience the opposite to KNOW happiness.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and adding your insight to this post. Muchly appreciated!

    Have a great week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  28. Good morning Jeanne~

    "I'm sorry that you had to go through all of that misery. I am also so very thankful that we have "met" and are blog friends...we can commiserate on just about anything!! Glad things are looking up for you, my friend!!:

    Truthfully, it was one of the most enlightening experiences I've been through. Yes, it was rough, but I learned that I can discover happiness within any condition.

    So glad we met too! Thanks a bunch for stopping by, dear lady.

    Hope you had a great birthday!

    X to you and the girlz!

    ReplyDelete
  29. Hey there Dianne!

    Isn't Fran great? I had a feeling you liked her too.

    "She's my kind of gal although I must admit I think it would be exhausting to be around her all the time"

    You know, I think you're right.

    "I think happiness is one of many emotions that pass through us if we're open
    I'm most happy when I'm with Hope yet in those times I also experience moments of nostalgia, regret, loss."

    I agree. There are many emotions we feel, and as I shared, I think it's important to ALLOW ourselves to experience those emotions as well, because we learn from them. For me, they usually teach me to focus on the things I have in my life to be grateful for, thus, returning me to happiness.

    "I like to think that we are either open or closed
    open to all around us and willing to accept and be
    or closed and existing in our own stew."

    Beautifully stated, dear lady!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this post. Muchly appreciated! Have a great week!

    Much X to you and Hope!

    ReplyDelete
  30. Hiya Babs~

    "I know people who choose to spend their lives in a negative state, seeing the worst in every situation."

    Meeeeeeee too! And they are the same people who are negative even when things are going well. It's like they're NOT happy unless they can see the worst in every situation. Truthfully, I think it's their way of preventing themselves from being surprised by a negative experience, so they just STAY in a negative state so that they're ready for it. Either that, or they do it for attention.

    " Mo and I lived through a very dark time in our lives, which also ended in bankruptcy. Yet with an attitude of 'We will overcome it', we did and nothing will ever take us to that place again. We choose to be happy!"

    That's right, I forgot, you and Mo went through bankruptcy also.

    As challenging as it was, wasn't it the most eye-opening experience in seeing that we can be internally happy, regardless of what condition our life is in? For me, my happiness stemmed from remembering the things in my life that I had to be grateful for.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this post. You added much! Have a great week!

    X to you and Mo!

    ReplyDelete
  31. Amen Ron, Being happy includes feeling all the other emotions and being able to deal with them as they come, we go through hard knocks and lose everything sometimes but at the end of the day if we have the strength to appreciate what we have rather than wallow in self pity then we can be happy.

    Excellent post my Happy Friend.

    ReplyDelete
  32. "I do think it’s possible to remain a happy person in spite of feeling other emotions. Happiness is a choice."

    Ron, I couldn't agree, more. You always have a CHOICE. You can choose to wallow, or you can choose to move on.

    ReplyDelete
  33. Hey there Jimmy~

    "we go through hard knocks and lose everything sometimes but at the end of the day if we have the strength to appreciate what we have rather than wallow in self pity then we can be happy."

    Exactly. And that's the meaning of this post. We can still feel all the other emotions, yet remain a happy person inside.

    Gratitude = Happiness in spit of life's conditions.

    Thanks a bunch for stopping by, buddy. Have a terrrrrific week!

    X to you and Miss Cindy!

    ReplyDelete
  34. Hey there Meleah~

    "You always have a CHOICE. You can choose to wallow, or you can choose to move on. "

    Amen! Being happy is perception and choice.

    Thanks so much for stopping by. And thanks again for letting me know about the glitch on my blog yesterday (I had no idea it even happened!?!). Apparently, it was not due to a hacker, but from an technical overload. THANK GOD they fixed it!

    You GO, Daddy!

    Have a an awesome week, girl!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  35. Love this post! I never think of people in terms of being happy or sad. I think of them as being positive or negative. You are definitely a positive person, Ron!

    ReplyDelete
  36. On my way to work today, I was getting annoyed at Paul because he was asking me too many questions and playfully picking at me. Then I rememberd, "Oh yes, this is what I wanted for so many years." We have to remember to be happy too Ron. Sometimes, we just forget.

    ReplyDelete
  37. Hey there Bijoux~

    "I never think of people in terms of being happy or sad. I think of them as being positive or negative."

    OMG...I can't believe you said that because I think the same thing!

    It's funny because upon immediately meeting someone for the first time (even online), I can usual feel if they're predominately positive or negative. I can feel their 'energy.'

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend! Hope you're having a faaaaaaaaaabulous week!

    X

    P.S. And you're definitely positive too! :)

    ReplyDelete
  38. Hiya Bill~

    "Then I rememberd, "Oh yes, this is what I wanted for so many years." We have to remember to be happy too Ron. Sometimes, we just forget."

    You are absolutely right! And it's so ironic you used the word 'remember' because that's initially how I was going to end this post.

    "And remember happy"

    I kid you not!

    Thanks for stopping by, buddy! Have a great week!

    X to you and Paul!

    ReplyDelete
  39. I think you're absolutely right, Ron! Spot on.

    It took me a while to discover it, but yes, happiness is a choice you can make. It's not that you decide to be happy, and hey presto! you are happy ... it's more that you decide to notice and enjoy the good things in your life and refuse to dwell too much on the grim.

    I know this because looking back, I can see that I made a choice to be miserable and truculent as a teenager.

    Sure, things happen to make you miserable. People - and beloved animals - die, financial situations go bad, houses get burgled or catch fire and I defy anyone to feel actively happy under those circumstances, but there's a time for the picking up, brushing off, and saying 'OK, let's see what we're left with... Oh, look, I am still here, I have my friends, my books, my dogs/cat/mice, whatever. My husband/wife/partner/children still love/s me. Etc.

    You also can choose to take pleasure in small things, and make the most of what you do have, and to me, that is almost the definition of happiness.

    'Scuse me, I have a nice cup of tea to attend to while enjoying the fresh breeze from the open door around my hot, bare feet!

    ReplyDelete
  40. hmm, i don't know. i guess in the movie the pursuit of happyness, will's character quoted lincoln, i believe, when he said happiness is something that has to be pursued. i agree with that a bit. i am not sure if it's a constant condition, i don't believe that is true with me. overall i may be happy because things could be worse, but am i in a state of happiness half the time. helllllllz no!!! i guess i'm content with bouts of happiness in between. i believe if one has to tell people they are happy: i am happily single, married, divorced, straight, gay, whatever, it seems as though they are trying to (how do you spell convince) convince themselves or people that they are happy. some people are scared not to be happy. if someone is happy, i see no need to announce it, people will just know or see it. it's hard to be truly happy in this world, but i think overall, there is much happiness to be found.

    ReplyDelete
  41. Hey there V-Girl~

    " when he said happiness is something that has to be pursued. i agree with that a bit. i am not sure if it's a constant condition, i don't believe that is true with me."

    I agree, it's not a constant condition with me either, but overall I think I'm a happy person. I can feel so many emotions throughout any given day (anger, sadness, fear, etc.), but basically I think I'm a happy person.

    " i believe if one has to tell people they are happy: i am happily single, married, divorced, straight, gay, whatever, it seems as though they are trying to (how do you spell convince) convince themselves or people that they are happy. some people are scared not to be happy."

    TOTALLY agree with that too. Some people ONLY want to feel happy and refuse/deny any other feelings. In fact, I work with someone like that. If anyone around him talks about anything sad or expresses ANY anger - he walks away. And what's ironic is that HE himself is an angry and sad person. It's like he doesn't want to see it in anyone else because then he sees it in HIMSELF.

    " if someone is happy, i see no need to announce it, people will just know or see it. it's hard to be truly happy in this world, but i think overall, there is much happiness to be found."

    You hit the nail on the head and expressed exactly what I am saying with this post...

    ...there is much happiness to be found. And even when life's conditions are not ideal.

    We just have to remember it.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and adding your thoughts and insight to this post. Muchly appreciated!

    Have a great week, girl!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  42. Hiya Jay~

    "It's not that you decide to be happy, and hey presto! you are happy ... it's more that you decide to notice and enjoy the good things in your life and refuse to dwell too much on the grim."

    BINGO! That's exactly what I mean in sharing this post. It's deciding, allowing, and remembering the things we have in our lives that are the GOOD things; thus, being happy, in spite of what condition our lives might be in.

    I'm certainly not ALWAYS feeling happy 24/7 because I can feel so many other emotions, but I think deep down inside, I'm a happy person.

    ", but there's a time for the picking up, brushing off, and saying 'OK, let's see what we're left with... Oh, look, I am still here, I have my friends, my books, my dogs/cat/mice, whatever. My husband/wife/partner/children still love/s me. Etc."

    Yup, that's it!

    "You also can choose to take pleasure in small things, and make the most of what you do have, and to me, that is almost the definition of happiness.

    'Scuse me, I have a nice cup of tea to attend to while enjoying the fresh breeze from the open door around my hot, bare feet!"

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! That's it.....exactly!

    Always fabs to see ya, Jay. Thanks for stopping by and adding your insight and thoughts to this post. Appreciated!

    Enjoy the rest of your week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  43. “I do think it’s possible to remain a happy person in spite of feeling other emotions.


    Happiness is a choice.

    True, the condition of life might not always be happy. But I do not believe that I don’t have a choice to discover happiness, in spite life’s condition.”


    Ron, I give you thumbs up on the above and completely agree!

    I was a negative person (due in part to my childhood) always waiting for the other shoe to drop, always blaming myself for everything that went “wrong” and always looking at the problem rather than trying to find a solution, which made me very UNhappy.

    Then one day I heard my son, who about four at the time, say, “Why does this always happen to me?” and I wanted to slap myself up one side of my head and down the other. He was repeating what he heard and LEARNED from ME! So, right there and then I made a concerted effort to only say POSITVE things. Then I began thinking positive thoughts. That, combined with my path of self-healing, helped make me a happy person!

    But it became my CHOICE.

    Today it’s very difficult for me to think negatively and to be UNhappy. Even through my recent ordeal, I was happy although I did feel sadness and was very stressed.

    We can CHOOSE to be happy and feel the gamut of emotions that go with life OR we can be sad and feel the gamut of emotions that go with life.

    Either way, it’s a choice.

    I choose happy.

    ((YOU))

    ReplyDelete
  44. Hey there Pam~

    *two thumbs up*

    I freakin' LOVED your comment because having been through what you've been through these past two months, you're a prime example of choosing to SEE the happiness in your life, in spite of life's condition!

    "I was a negative person (due in part to my childhood) always waiting for the other shoe to drop, always blaming myself for everything that went “wrong” and always looking at the problem rather than trying to find a solution, which made me very UNhappy."

    You are sooooooooo right! So often we get stuck in only focusing on the problem rather than a solution, which makes us MORE unhappy.

    " He was repeating what he heard and LEARNED from ME! So, right there and then I made a concerted effort to only say POSITVE things. Then I began thinking positive thoughts. That, combined with my path of self-healing, helped make me a happy person!"

    As I've shared with you so many times before, you are SUCH an awesome parent because you have the ability to stand back and see how you're reacting to a situation and then change it; teaching your children the same.

    "Today it’s very difficult for me to think negatively and to be UNhappy. Even through my recent ordeal, I was happy although I did feel sadness and was very stressed."

    Absolutely, I think (in fact, I know) ANYONE would feel those same things going through your recent ordeal. But even so, feeling sad and stressed, you STILL managed to remain positive and find happiness in the condition. I sooooooo admire you for that!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your insight and wisdom on this post. You've added soooooooo much!

    (((((( You )))))))

    Hope you're having a super week!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  45. I see Ms. Lebowitz's point, but agree with your position Ron. I too believe that happiness originates from a place of gratitude. Even in the midst of an unpleasant situation, as you described, one is not required to banish other positive feelings from your heart. Very thought provoking post!!

    ReplyDelete
  46. Hey there Diane~

    Yes, I do see Fran's point too. Because no one is only HAPPY all the time, that's not realistic. There are so many different emotions we feel and these feelings should not be denied.

    But it's as you shared....

    " happiness originates from a place of gratitude."

    I think it's as Billshared in his comment too...

    "We have to remember to be happy."

    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. Hope you're having a super week!

    Much X to you and Cristybella!

    ReplyDelete
  47. Ron, I just wanted to stop by and let you know that I purchased and watched "Public Speaking" this afternoon and loved it! I didn't realize Martin Scorsese directed it.

    This is going to be one of those movies that I watch again and again.

    ReplyDelete
  48. Hey Robert~

    Yaaaaaaaaaaaay! I'm so glad to hear that you purchased the film and love it! Isn't it faaaaaabulous? Yes, Martin Scorsese directed it!

    "This is going to be one of those movies that I watch again and again."

    Meeeeeeeeee too!

    Thanks so much for stopping back and letting me know! Enjoy your weekend!

    X

    ReplyDelete
  49. Ron
    This is something I've been having a hard time with this summer. Hence, my near disappearance from the internet. I read a really interesting book by a researcher who backs up her claims with studies that being happy has three components: 10% environmental, 50% biology and 40% choice. Half of it is how we're hard wired but nearly half has to do with our outlook and hard work. For those who suffer from bouts of depression, sometimes it's just not enough to will yourself to be happy. I wish it were that simple. But, the good news is that there is so much that we can do simply being positive. You are my hero as far as that is concerned. Thanks for being that ray of sunshine!

    ReplyDelete
  50. Hey there Jen~

    LOVED your comment, girl!

    "I read a really interesting book by a researcher who backs up her claims with studies that being happy has three components: 10% environmental, 50% biology and 40% choice."

    That is so interesting because I didn't know that but I believe it.

    And it's so ironic you shared this....

    "For those who suffer from bouts of depression, sometimes it's just not enough to will yourself to be happy. I wish it were that simple."

    .....because one of my other readers, Nitebyrd, shared something very similar in her comment that there is a mental condition that actually inhibits "happiness" which she will be posting about on her blog.

    " But, the good news is that there is so much that we can do simply being positive."

    Amen!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing your insight on this post. Muchly appreciated. And thank you for your sweet words.

    Have a great week, Jen!

    X

    ReplyDelete

I moderate all comments before publishing. Thank you for stopping by.