Wednesday, September 19, 2007

Cell Phones (Pt.1)

For the amount of contempt and hatred that I have for the usage of cell phones, I will have to express myself gradually in parts, as not to burst a coronary aneurism in front of your eyes.

I truly believe, that I am the only human being on the face of this earth that does not own one of these “body appendages.”

Now.....let’s start with the silly, asinine, lame, over-used, and ridiculous excuse for why most people SAY they have one.

Ready?

“Oh….I really only have it in case of emergencies.”

Emergencies….really?

Please tell me what kind of an “emergency” is forcing me to listen to you in a public restaurant, scream at the top of your lungs at your dumb-ass boyfriend for screwing your best girlfriends’ brother-law for the second time; while she and you were out shopping at the mall, buying him a new cell phone for his birthday?

And please tell me what kind of an “emergency” is forcing me to listen to you on the city streets, scream at your child for being a lazy-ass SOB, because they didn’t do the dinner dishes?

And lastly, please tell me what kind of an “emergency” is forcing me to listen to you in a grocery store, talk to your girlfriend about how drunk you got last night at a dorm party, and how embarrassed you were when you threw up all over your other girlfriends’ new designer handbag?

Emergencies???

I don’t think so people.

What the hell ever happened to privacy?

Has it EVER occured to you, that the rest of the world might be listening to your filthy, dirty laundry?

Save your cell phones for a REAL emergency.

But please know that I’m sending you light and love!



Photo: Queen Bitch