There's No Business Like Troll Business

I can remember two different decades when trolls, were the most popular things to own.

First in the 60’s…when you could only purchase them NUDE.

And then again in the late 80’s…when they came dressed in a theme.

I never quite understood if a troll was a man or a woman...or simply androgynous?

Back in the 60’s when I was just a kid, I saved up all my allowance money so I could buy one. It also came with a little plastic brush so you could style it’s hair. My favorite thing to do, was to braid the hair while it was wet, and then after it dried, I would take out the braid…which then made the troll look like it had been electrocuted.

Kids would even bring their trolls to school in their book bags and lunch boxes.

That is…if you went to PUBLIC school.

The CATHOLIC school children were absolutely forbidden to bring a troll on school grounds.

(trolls were considered the spawn of Satan)

And if you were EVER caught with a troll during catholic school hours, it was immediately confiscated and you would never see it again.

I often wondered where the nuns put them…?

(personally, I think they were all placed in a box…and then later sold for pagan babies)

Years afterward…trolls lost their luster, and pretty much disappeared.

Then in the 80’s, trolls began to walk the earth again. However this time…wearing fabulous little outfits. You could purchase them decked out in all sorts of themes, such as: Hillbillies, Batman, Punk Rockers, and Ballet Dancers.

It was at this time, I was working as a hairstylist in a salon. I had collected several trolls throughout the year, and suddenly got this brilliant idea of trying out new haircuts on them. A good friend of my was a nail technician in the salon where I worked, so after I would style the hair, I would turn the little girl trolls over to her, and she would then paint their finger and toenails with various colors. She would also put some lipstick, blush and eye shadow on them.

(isn’t this an interesting and SICK story?)

Anyway….I started displaying the coiffured trolls at my work station, so that my clients could see what we had created. And believe it or not…they went NUTS over them and started asking us if we could do the same thing for their trolls. And we did! We never charged them any fee for doing it, we just did it for the hell of it.

Eventually trolls lost their luster again…and vanished.

I often wondered what I ever did with all those trolls….?

(oh, that’s right…I put them in a box…and then later sold them for pagan babies)




34 comments

  1. Ever notice how the Olsen twins (Mary-Kate and Asley) looked just like troll babies when they were younger.

    Straaaaange!

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  2. Holy shit, Jeff....you're freaking RIGHT!!!!

    TROLLS!!!!

    I NEVER thought of that!!!

    Damn...you're GOOD!

    Thanks for that VISUAL!!!

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  3. now I am sure there must be at least a couple somewhere under the bunk beds in the boys room

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  4. Hubby loves Rachel Ray... please... and I am so NOT into her. Way.too.perky. I call her the Joker, because of that funny smile and the EVOO crap and prattling on with the Yum-O this and Yum-O that. grrhhh
    Now me. I love the Barefoot Contessa! Okay, Nigella is actually my FAV but she's a blog post all in herself. So I guess to get back at me for dissing his food girl, he calls mine......
    A TROLL. Seriously, a troll.
    OMG
    But what the hell does he know anyway?? This man, who I love, love, love and absolutely adore. He's sexy and smart, and ...
    OH wait, let's not go there, but this man comes to me one day and says....
    'honey, can you come here, there is a program on and there's something strange about it. So I go into the living room to take a look and the 'Brini Maxwell' show is on. It was new, I think on the Style network. He says... watch her. So I do. And he says... there's something odd about her isn't there?
    And I'm like, HONEY.... she's a man!! And then he was like... OOOOhhhh, you are right. That's it.
    I'm surprised he didn't figure that out about Rach either. LOL
    Anyhoo....
    I never had trolls as a kid. I had a Mrs. Beasley doll and she was strange enough. LOL BUT our daughter had a bunch of them. She was born in '84 so they were popular again when she was little. I don't know if they are in a box in the basement or not. I hope they are not multiplying down there as they just freaked and creeped me OUT!!

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  5. Jeff is so RIGHT! The Olsen's look(ed) exactly like trolls!

    Ron, YOU freak me out! I have a doll collection and have saved my troll dolls since the '60's! I have the standard ones plus mermaids, a big giraffe troll and a little bull troll! Gods! I adore them! Do you still have your trolls?

    Right now I'm into Living Dead Dolls but I think the trolls would fit right in with them.

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  6. Oh my gosh, Jeff, you hit the nail on the head with that comment. lol

    Trolls kind of scared me when I was little...I have quite an imagination.

    You definitely need to find a collection of trolls, Ron, and give them haircuts and photograph them for the blog. A troll fashion show!

    Fun post!

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  7. Yeah, what are they...boys or girls? Not Mary-Kate and Ashley...the trolls. LOL!!

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  8. Morning Lady~

    Hey...I'll pay you 200 pounds for one!

    And I'll even pay for shipping!

    Plus...I'll cut your hair for the next year!

    P.S. Save them...one day they'll be worth thousands!!

    Great seeing ya, Lady!!!!

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  9. HALOOOOO Nitebyrd~

    Ok? Are we siblings...or ar we siblings???

    (is this not scary?)

    I cannot believe you actually have your trolls from the 60's!!!

    WOW!!!!

    Hold on to them...so when I come to visit you in FLorida...we can drink wine...and put on a Troll Show! I'll do all the hair and make up...and you can supply the background music!

    Maybe we could do the musical, HAIR!

    And then, at the end of the closing number...the Night of the Living Dead dolls can come on and EAT them!

    My, my...too bad we didn't know each other when we were kids.!?!?

    GREAT seeing ya, you wild dusty bunny, you!

    Thanks for sharing in the "Troll Love."

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  10. Morin' Rhea!!!

    I know...Jeff DID hit the nail on the head!

    As soon as he said it...I thought...NO SHIT!!

    Some trolls WERE kind of scary, I agree. The orginal trolls were really sweet looking. Later on, they went through a faze of looking like....CHUCKY!

    Hey...GREAT idea about the troll fashion show!!! Thank you for that!

    I could do like a, Troll Glamour Shot Event! They could where little hats and boa's!

    Thanks so much for dropping in today, for this walk down TROLL memory lane!!!!

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  11. Mary, Mary, Mary....

    Dear mother of god....you make me LAUGH beyond belief!!

    Your comment about your husband and the Brini Maxwell Show just about made me spit my morning coffee all over the computer monitor!!

    OMG...that was HYSTERICAL!!

    Duh...I could of had a V-8!

    Ok...and you mentioned Mrs. Beasley!!! Can I just tell you HOW MUCH that doll FREAKED me out as a kid???

    I HATED her!

    And the way those little glasses sat at the end of her nose...made me want to SCREAM!!

    Did you EVER get a good look at the expression on her face???

    She looked like a VALUIM!

    ewwww!

    Be sure that BOX in the basement is SECURE...I don't trust that doll!

    Great talking to ya, Mary Catherine!

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  12. Howdy Gene!!!

    Ok...you and Jeff are definately RELATED!!

    That's FUNNY!

    I honestly don't know what gender a troll is. I mean, I guess the clothing would be the determining factor, right???

    Oh, my...isn't this sick...talking about troll gender?

    Great seeing ya, Gene...and thanks for joining in on the FUN!

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  13. GMFAO!!!!!!!!

    This is soooooooooooooooooooo cute!!!! I LOVED my trolls!

    I totally forgot all about them! Thank you so much for the great memories!

    That last pic is gorgeous! xx

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  14. My mother had a lucky troll that she brought with her when she went to play bingo. The thing was about 18 inches high with orange hair that was another 10 inches high. That thing was her constant companion for a few years. She never won with that stupid thing and eventually we sacrificed the thing. Marinated it and put it in the traditional Sunday Pasta Sauce. He was last seen swimming in a vat of meatballs and sausage. What a tasty morsel he was. Tasted like chicken.
    Then when I was a teen-ager I was awarded a small troll as a prize in my Catholic School. The nun who gave it to me had it in a box hidden under the floor boards under her desk. UMMMMM you may be correct about the pagan baby thing.

    Ron, What a great post. The smile is still on my face and the memories in my head.
    Thanks.

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  15. The trolls are coming, the trolls are coming.....


    I think they're due to return anytime soon!

    I love the idea of you doing their hair and nails - I bet they looked so cute!

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  16. The trolls are coming, the trolls are coming.....


    I think they're due to return anytime soon!

    I love the idea of you doing their hair and nails - I bet they looked so cute!

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  17. Whatever I was going to say about this post is completely pointless now. I cannot get past Jeff's comment. Holy crap, he is right!!!

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  18. Evening Nicole~

    I know...as soon as I read his comment...a beautiful vision of those two little troll girls POPPED into my head...and CRACKED UP!!!

    Because he's so RIGHT!!!

    Thanks for stopping by today! Hope the Spring cleaning is going well!

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  19. Evening Giggle~

    I don't know what the hell ever made me THINK of trolls yesterday...but when I did...I was suddenly filled with this FUN memory!

    I actually can't remember what I did with all of those!?!? But they were so cute!

    Glad you enjoyed, dear Giggle!

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  20. Evening Akelamalu~

    YEAAAAA! The trolls are coming!!!!

    I think they're about ready to make another entrance. And when they do...I have my cutting shears READY!!

    And if you want, you can FEDEX your troll to me and I'll style it for you...for FREE!

    I gave all the little boy trolls a FLAT TOP. They looked like military men!

    They girl trolls were a lot more DRAMATIC!

    Great seeing ya, dear lady! Thanks for stopping by!

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  21. Why does NONE of this surprise me? LOL

    <--shaking head and being grateful for NEVER having had a troll in her lifetime

    *whew*

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  22. OH MY GOD...DAVE!!!!

    That story was HYSTERICAL!!! She really DID take it to BINGO??? Dear god, that's funny!

    YES!!!! I DO remember the really LARGE trolls!!!!

    They were the size of a small baby!! And the hair was equally as large!! They were kind of creepy!

    And I CANNOT believe that the NUNS awarded you with a TROLL!?!?! My God...what catholic school did you go to? I bet it was much better than mine. I had St. Joseph nuns, and trolls were OUTLAWED!

    SEE!!! They did keep them in a box...I knew it!

    And I bet 1000 pagan babies were released from the fires of hell with the money sold from those TROLLS!

    OH...didn't you just LOVE going to catholic school???

    NOT!

    Thanks SOOOO much for sharing that priceless story, sir Dave. It added wonderful SPICE to my troll tale!

    Great seeing you, funny man!

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  23. Howdy Mel!

    Surprise!!!!

    OOOOOH come on...you NEVER had a troll???

    They went so WELL with a Rubber Duckie in the bathtub! Especially if you held them under the water until they drowned!!!

    Oh...I know I'm a severely SICK man...but I LOVED trolls!

    Thanks for stopping by, dear Mel. You made me giggle!

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  24. Wow..what a memory!!!

    I attended a small elementary school, and trolls were serious business! Every day at recess there was a fashion show!!

    The "rich girls" had an entire wardrobe. I always did my own thing..glitter..nose piercings!
    I was always in my own little world. hee, hee.

    Thanks for another great post!

    Love ya!

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  25. Evening Dearest Gypsy-Heart~

    Oh...leave it to my Capricorn buddy to understand the SERIOUS business of TROLLS!

    Damn...a fashion show???

    That is TOOOOO cool!

    I love it...GLITTER and NOSE PIERCINGS!!!! That is too wonderful!

    I actually thought of maybe starting a Troll Glamour Shot Studio, where you could bring your troll in, and have pictures taken of it wearing little outfits!!!

    Aren't I INSANE?

    Thank you dear HEART, for sharing your story and passion for TROLLS!

    P.S. maybe you could paint a picture of a troll and place in on your posts!!!

    Love ya, too!

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  26. hey ron...the Olsen twins and I have something in common. We share that day to celebrate our birthdays. Yay!

    Trolls...hum, I've seen them but never got into them. I don't know why...maybe it was school. You are right...the nuns (Sister Mary Alice)was strick and could strike with a pointer stick like a warrior and his sword. Plus they will pull your hair to get your attention as you day dream about that cute red head that sat in front of you...oh...uh, I meant me.

    heheh...fab post Ron. I like.

    Ciao babes.

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  27. I had a huge collection of trolls - the normal sized ones, and then they came out with the mini ones and the big ones... I had those too. All different colored hair. Yep, I had shelves FULL of trolls.

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  29. Howdy Misty~

    Yahoooo...another troll lover!

    Hey...that's right...they did come in mini's too! I think I even remember having a troll KEY RING!!!

    Oh...for the LOVE of trolls!!

    Great seeing ya, Misty and thanks for stopping by!

    Listen...your entrecard should be on my blog in two days! Thanks for dropping...it'll be a pleasure having you here!

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  30. Oh, shit Spiky...you made me LAUGH my butt off!

    WOW...so you and the Olsen twins share the same birthday??? Oh, god...don't tell Jeff...he may start a calling you a TROLL.

    (gee...I hope you didn't hear that, Jeff)

    And you ALSO went to catholic school???

    Wasn't it the most delightful thing in your life?

    NOT!

    I went to the "Joan Crawford Catholic School for OCD Children"

    Yea...and your right...I DO remember the girls getting their hair pulled, and the boys having their ears pulled. I was actually slapped several times!

    (but very gently)

    And didn't you love the knuckle cracking with the metal ruler???

    Ahhhh such beautiful memories!!

    Always GREAT talking to ya, Spiky!

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  31. I never quite understood if a troll was a man or a woman...or simply androgynous?


    I hate that you put the thought of troll sex in my head. ;p

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  32. Howdy Anndi~

    Ohhh...that's FUNNY!!!

    I know...can you IMAGINE???

    NOT!

    I think it's best if we keep thinking that they're PRODUCED from the toy store...and that's it!

    Hey, this is funny, because earlier today for some reason I was thinking about you, and when I checked my comments...there you were!

    I guess it was "LIBRA intuition"

    Thanks for stopping by, Anndi...it's always nice seeing ya!

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  33. Aaawww, you've just brought back some memories there (scoots to eBay to find some)

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  34. Greetings Vi~

    Welcome...and thanks for taking the time to leave a comment!

    Hey...I've seen your avatar on many of the blogs that I visit, so I feel like I actually know you!

    Yea...I think I saw a TROLL sale on ebay...

    "Buy one...get 10 FREE"

    tee, hee!

    Thanks for stopping by!!!

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