Wednesday, August 27, 2008

On Using a Child's Toothbrush

I once had a dentist advise me to always use a child’s toothbrush when brushing my teeth.

One reason is because the brush is smaller and is able to focus on each tooth.

Another reason is because the bristles are softer, which means the brush is easier on the gums.

I started using a child’s toothbrush probably 15 years ago.

Now grant it, it took me a while to get use to the little brush size, but now if I try and use an adult toothbrush, it literally feels as though I'm using a DUSTPAN brush.

The bristles on an adult brush actually feel painful, and the brush head feels way too big.

The only thing about using a child’s toothbrush, is that they need to be replaced more often because the bristles ARE softer.

This is where The Dollar Store comes in handy.

I buy several brushes at a time, so I can use a fresh one each month.

(and The Dollar Store is also where I get my EVIL shower curtain liners)

Anyway….the last time I purchased some toothbrushes, I grabbed a few that I had never before seen the name brand.

They were called Fire Fly.

You will notice a white part on the lower half of the handle. This part feels “rubbery” to the touch. I initially thought it was there only as something decorative.

(stupid me)

Anyhoo…one evening before bed, I went into the bathroom and proceed to do what I always do…brush my teeth.

(and also to check for any additional wrinkles on my face)

Well I started brushing as normal, when ALL OF A SUDDEN…the toothbrush started doing this…

HOLY SHIT IN HELL!!…it scared the living CRAP out of me!

It started blinking and winking and flashing like a friggin' LIGHTENING STORM. And when I looked in the mirror, my entire face looked as though it was being ELECTROCUTED!

I quickly yanked the brush out of my mouth and flung into the sink, where it continued to do it’s crazy FLASH dance.

Finally it stopped.

And when I picked it up to reexamined the handle, I noticed that there was a little spring inside the rubber part. And when I pushed on it…the brush started FLASHING again.

I thought to myself. “Aaaah, that’s it…it must be squeeze-activated.”

Thus the name…Fire Fly.

It serves me right for NOT reading the package before I used the damn freakish thing.

And I’m assuming that the clever FLASHING must be there, to make tooth-brushing much more enticing and fun for kids.

(either that…or to SCARE the plaque off their teeth)