Grocery Bagging Protocol


I can still remember as a little boy, standing in the checkout line at the grocery store, watching my mother placed all the groceries in our cart on the conveyor belt, as each item made there way to the cashier.

And what always amazed me, was how quickly the cashier would manually enter the prices on the cash register.

(this was before the NEVER working SKU scanning came into use)

I use to love to watch her fingers fly across the register buttons, and then finally hit the TOTAL key.

(wow…$45.00 for a whole family!)

My secret dream at that time…was to one day BE a cashier.

(I set extreme goals for myself)

And another thing that I noticed, was how the cashier carefully bagged our groceries. She would separate the COLD items in one bag; placing them all TOGETHER.

To me, that just seemed logical.

I mean if you bag all the cold items together, then they help to keep everything COLD, right?

(I even failed science class…and I know THAT)

Well, tell me…..where has this logic gone?

It seems that bagging groceries has become a “lost art.”

The cashier just seems to throw everything together.

My shampoo bottle ends up with my frozen veggie burgers.

(it’s that a tasty marriage?”)

And I especially love when they toss my bread in the bag, first…and then pulverize it with all the canned goods.

(this is especially helpful if the only reason you purchased the bread, was to feed the ducks)

Today while I was waiting in line at the grocery store, I actually heard the customer in front of me explain to the cashier, that he wanted all the cold items together.

DUH!?!?!?

And MY question is this…..

“Why did the cashier even have to be told?”

You see…this is WHY I always bag my own groceries.

And for good reasons…

1) to help the cashier move quicker, so I can get the HELL out of the store.

And 2) to make sure all my groceries get home ALIVE.

Maybe I should write a book about proper grocery bagging.

And I could call it….






What do ya, think?

32 comments

  1. I'll buy one. And then distribute it to a few people.
    My daughter used to work in a grocery store and she was trained how to bag. So sometimes she'll look after we've gone foodshopping to see what's with what. Occasionally she'll make mention of an item that shouldn't be in a bag. Now, most of the time, we go to Wegmans. It's difficult to help with bagging there because the groceries pretty much stop with the cashier and they put them in bags as they are ringing. Sometimes you get a really s.l.o.w worker who you just want to throttle because you know precious items are just melting away as the clock ticks. Other times you know the deodorant is mingling with the frozen waffles. For the most part, their staff is great, it's a really nice friendly store!! And we go back again and again for alot of reasons. But it's just inevitable that someone at the checkout will do their own thing occasionally and put that rogue freezer item with the toilet paper. So I do try to separate things on the conveyor belt because today, you never know who is helping you and what kind of day they've had. LOL

    We usually unpack everything, but sometimes if we have a few bags of cans that are going to the basement for storage the bag might get left unchecked. That's when I've found a roll of biscuits or a stray block of cheese that didn't make it to the cold bag.

    Speaking of cold.... isn't this weather delicious?? Last night it had gotten so chilly that I got a hot bubble bath before bed. Yum!

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  2. I agree with you completey - most baggers don't have a clue what they're doing. However, I'd rather bitch than bag the groceries myself. Go figure.

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  3. You buy live groceries?

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  4. You need to write this book!
    I swear it should be a mandatory read!
    Just recently had a kid DROP a gallon of Milk unto my eggs.
    I just looked at him..Do you honestly think those eggs survived?
    hunh?
    insert stupid confused look here.
    geez.
    I normally bag all my stuff as well, but i was babysitting a very wild 2 year old.
    Who by the way did a better job bagging...
    Write the book!

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  5. Good Morning Crystal Chick!

    Thanks my friend....

    ....if I DO write and publish it, you can sit with me in Barnes and Noble off Rittenhouse, when I do the book signing event!

    HAHAHHAHA!

    Hey...I've never been to a Wegmans, but I've seen them around. Me?....I shop either Trader Joes or Super Fresh. I prefer Trader Joes, cause I like how friendly and helpful the staff is!

    But either store....they still have NO idea how to bag.

    Oh well...

    ...this is why I choose to bag my own.

    Call me OCD!

    tee, hee!

    And OMG, M.....it's hysterical that you mentioned the cold weather and bubble baths, because for the past three evenings...I've done the same thing!!!!

    And doesn't it feel incredible?

    In fact, last night I got so relaxed while soaking, that I almost fell asleep!!!

    Thanks for dropping by today, M!

    And thanks for your offer to buy my book!!!!

    ooooh...maybe I can even sell it on Amazon!!!

    Happy Wednesday, M!!!!

    P.S. I hope all is going well with your jewelry creations!

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  6. Greetings DP!

    Welcome...

    Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to share a comment.

    Nice meeting you!

    And I totally agree with you TOO!

    It's much more fun to BITCH about it, isn't it?

    tee, hee..

    Hey, I just quickly clicked over on your blog before I left this comment.

    WOW...what a great looking blog you have! I love the header image.

    I'm stop by later this evening to say HI!

    Hope you have a GREAT Wednesday.

    And watch out for those grocery baggers!!!

    HA!

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  7. HelloooooooAnndi!!!

    OMG....it's so GREAT seeing ya, my friend!!!

    Thanks for dropping by today!

    And YES...I buy ALL LIVE groceries!

    The store is called:

    "SUPER LIVE"

    They're tad more expensive...but it's worth it!

    Tee, hee, hee, hee!

    Happy Wednesday Anndi!
    X

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  8. Morning Lady Sorrow!

    THANK YOU, THANK YOU, THANK YOU for sharing your experience with the milk/egg thing!

    SEE!!!!

    This is what I'm talking about.

    Now I realize that not ALL cashers/baggers are this way...but I find that many ARE!

    And TOO many.

    And good for you, for joining me in the "self-bagging movement"

    YEEEEHAW!!!!

    Hey, and if I DO publish this book...you'll immediately receive a FREE copy.

    In fact I'll dedicate it to you!

    "This book is dedicated to my good friend Sorrow...who had her EGGS smashed by a gallon of milk"

    HAHAHAHAHA!

    GOD LOVE YA WOMAN!!!

    Thanks for sharing on this post, Sorrow!
    X

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  9. I always get a few things at a time and bring an eco bag, so I throw everything in myself. I always say "I don't need a bag."
    They always say "are you sure?"
    IF I WASN'T sure, would I SAY that?
    Veggie burgers sound good to me! But then you gotta buy the Veggie cheese slices, buns, etc...
    at about five bucks an item...sheesh.

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  10. I also remember those days of yore when the cashier totaled the groceries, but bagged the goods. In today's large supermarket it seems as if not only do need to take out a 2nd mortgage to buy food, but there is never anyone thre to bag your food. You have to do it yourself. Try as I might I can never open those plastic bags and when I do there is about 34 bags stuck together. and, if it is one those rear times that someone comes along to bag your stuff, then buyer beware. It seems as if the motto is don't look, don't think just pack. I have had milk open up with paper towels. One dozen of eggs reduced to 3 scrambled. When you complain the manager looks at you as if you have two heads and how dare you take his precisous time from the crossword puzzle.
    When I was a kid I remember on bagger who could bag food for two lines at once and get the items in with out damage and before the cashier could ring out.
    The good old days!!!!!

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  11. It would be a NY Times #1 bestseller, for sure.

    Where I shop, the damn near have kittens, if you try to bag your own groceries. They also are employers of ... um,... challenged persons who bag groceries. While 99% of the time, this is only a minor problem, the other 1% causes chaos. In addition, all the extremely old men that don't play golf get part-time jobs bagging to get away from their old bags at home. Please forgive me if I offend anyone but I'm tired of getting hit on by men old enough to be MY grandfather!

    And ... don't even get me started on how they PACKPACKPACK the new "green" bags!

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  12. I'm with you on this one Ron, I hate other people packing my groceries! Quite often our supermarket let the students from a school come in to help pack groceries in return for a donation in their charity bucket. I always put a donation in but insist they don't touch my groceries! I am sure they think I'm wierd, but you understand don't you m'dear?

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  13. Aloha Debi!

    GOOD FOR YOU!!!

    You use an ECO BAG!

    I know that I should too, but I prefer standard paper bags.

    However, I DO recyle them by bringing them back to the store.

    I shop like you...a little at a time, and thats because I have such a small kitchen....PLUS I enjoy shopping like a European.

    Everything FRESH!

    OH MAN...and you said it, Deb.

    Why is it that purchasing alternative food (like veggie burgers and such) is SO DAMN expensive???

    I'm not a vegetarian, but I DO like certain veggie items.

    Thanks for stopping by today, Debi!

    Hope you had a MAVALOUS Wednesday!

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  14. BRAVO Mr. Dave BRAVO!!!!

    Spoken like a TRUE fellow LIBRA!!

    I too have complained about certain things in the store that I shop at...and I TOO have gotten that SAMN DAMN look...

    ....like, "Do you think I care, I'm busy!"

    GRRRRRRRRRR!!!!!

    SAD, isn't it?

    And aaaaaah....YES.

    I DO remember those baggers who could bag for two lines, and do it WELL!!

    You're so funny, Dave...

    Your description of trying to get those freaking plastic bags apart is sooo accurate!

    This is why I prefer paper. But even those get all stuck together, because they NOW make them out of TISSUE paper!!!

    God...doesn't it feel good to BITCH????

    HAHAHAHAHA!

    Well, tonight while I'm sipping my red wine...I'll toast you...and to the good old days!

    Thanks for sharing on this post, my friend.

    ALWAYS such a joy!

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  15. OMG...Lady Nitebyrd!

    You KILL me, you funny lady!

    Having lived in Florida, I do remember the elderly gentlemen bagging groceries.

    PUBLIX....

    "Where shopping is a pleasure!"

    And I bet you DO get hit on, constantly!!!

    You're pretty, bright, and sexy.

    And you push all their hormonal buttons!!

    WOO-WOO

    You give them heart palpatations!!

    And I'm BAD...I know, but I ask for PAPER bags, however, like I shared with Debi...I DO recyle them.

    I have to walk 13 blocks, to and from the grocery store, and for some reason...I find it easier carrying paper bags.

    Go figure?!?!

    Anyway, my Florida friend....thanks a BUNCH for sharing your wonderful VENT on this post.

    I LOVED IT!!!!

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  16. Yes...I TOTALLY UNDERSTAND...Akelamalu!

    Because honestly, I can do it faster and more efficient!

    And I really don't mind doing it, either.

    So I'm with you, dear lady...

    SELF-bagging all the way!

    YAHOOO!

    Thanks for sharing on this post, Akelamalu!

    And wishing you a wonderful evening!

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  17. I think it's some conspiracy to punish those of us who make healthy choices. Everywhere you look, it's fast food commercials, ads for junk, COUPONS for fast food and junk, vending machines filled with junk...
    If you like hot and spicy, Morningstar makes a Buffalo Veggie wings that are the shit! I could eat the whole package at one sitting, but limit myself to 6 nuggets. And Tabasco CheezIts. Dammit, I could eat the whole box!
    And I LOVE*LOVE*LOVE Tofutti Cuties

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  18. Grocery shopping?!

    NO thank you.
    This is a part of why himself is still around. *laughing*

    And on the off chance it's the three times a year that I do make that journey into the EVIL grocery store, himself does the bagging. And the little fella who oughta be doing it stands aside and makes room for him......
    But it's a whole different kinda experience with himself--it's a social event, not just an exercise in survival of the groceries.

    Chat, laugh, pack, laugh, harass the cashier and a few customers...pack some more.

    OMG...It's scary.
    And of course they love him!

    Small town Iowa....*shaking head*
    Go figure--I can't tell ya how many times folks he's run into at the store tell me he's the highlight of their day.

    O
    M
    G

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  19. Morning Debi!

    You're RIGHT...

    ...it's a CONSPIRACY!!!

    DAMN THEM!!!

    oooh...oooh...I LOVE ALL Morning Star stuff. In fact, that's the company who I buy my tomato/basil veggie burgers from!

    They're the BOMB!!!

    I enjoy them with some hummus on top...yummy!

    Morning Star ROCKS!!!

    Thanks for stopping back, Debi!

    Have a great day!

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  20. Good Morning Mel!

    YAHOOO...you have a designated grocery shopper in your household!!!

    OMG...Himself sounds wonderful!

    And I bet he IS the highlight of many peoples' day!!!

    Small town Iowa also sounds wonderful, Mel!

    It's funny, because for as much as I enjoy city life...there's another part of me that could very easily adapt to small town living. I wish there was a way for me to have BOTH.

    And aren't "I" greedy??????

    HAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Thank you so much for sharing such a warm and delightful himself grocery story, dear lady!

    It made my day!

    And enjoy YOURS!

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  21. Oh man, Ron, I would buy that book and gladly distribute it to a few people for you.
    The week before last, my groceries were bagged so poorly that I actually called the store manager to complain. And let me tell you, I make a point never to complain about people working service type jobs, because I have been there. Those are the types of jobs that I have mostly worked. So you know it was really bad if I felt the need to complain.
    So let me explain. I always bring my own reusable bags to the grocery store. One of my bags is bigger, insulated and zips shut, obviously for frozen food, right? I keep all of my regular bags inside of the insulated bag and when I get to the check out, I unzip the bag (so that they can see that there are other bags inside) and place it at the beginning of the conveyor belt.
    On this particular day, my bill came to $176 which is pretty standard for my family. It irritates me to pay that much for groceries every week, but what am I going to do?
    Anyways, the guy bagging my groceries was just throwing stuff into the bags. AND he didn't put anything in my insulated bag...nothing, not one thing. And yes, I did buy some frozen foods. I even said to him at one point, "I have that insulated bag for the cold food." He just looked at me like I was speaking Greek. A big 1/2 gallon of apple juice was on top of my grapes. You know those canvas bags have a flat bottom, so if you put the boxed food in there nicely, you can fit alot into them. Well he didn't put them in nicely. It was a mess. So much of a mess that I had to stand at my trunk in the parking lot and rearrange everything. I was pissed. Right about the time that I was finished rearranging my groceries and loading them into my car, the bagger came walking into the parking lot, got in his car and left. So you know his shift was over and he just didn't care about doing a good job with my groceries. That set me over the edge. So I pulled out my receipt to get the store phone number off of it, and called the manager right in the parking lot from my cell phone.
    And really Ron, I am not a complainer about things like this. I really am not. But there is no sense in that guy being so lazy.

    Whoa!! Felt good to get that off my chest.

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  22. ronnie, you are making me feel old and I already feel REALLY OLD ... but you are right, bagging your own groceries, OR, (this is the best), stand there, insisting what goes where, which is what I do. I have discovered that often, the bagging people haven't been trained to do it right! They are usually just kids...

    also, I hope you resolve your computer issues and wondered if it's MY blog that's the problem?

    well, hopefully, one way or the other, it gets straightened out because I miss you visiting and commenting on my blog!

    blessings and happiness to you...

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  23. Hi Ronnie, oh hell yes, write the book. I'd love to go to the local Albertson's Grocery store and quote a phase from your guide to bagging groceries.

    Like the lady that tossed my 12 packof diet Dr. Pepper. KA-THUD!

    What the f@ck was that? Was it an earth quake. We do live in California you know. It could happen. Anyway the gal said NAH, that ain't no earth quake, it was just the soda.

    Great...they will splash me when I open one...I just know it. And then they will be flat. That's when I'll show her...the rules with handling groceries, etc. etc.

    Ahem... there, I vented. I like Traders Joe's...there they bag all my stuff in cloth bags I bought there. Gotta go green sweets.

    If i dodn't go to Trader Joe's I go to a place where I bag my own. Um...thoough thee was that one time...I was a novice on bagging groceries at the time and put a loaf of bread with canned items.

    Yep...my girl, shook her head and went on for hours (10 minutes) about the adequate way to bag groceries.

    Write the book sweetie. Woohoo.

    Ciao babe...you rock.

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  24. Thanks for the giggle! Maybe we're about the same age 'cause I have exactly the same recollections and think the same thoughts when I'm at the market. When I come home with smushed Wonder Bread I can't help wondering about the IQ of the person that thought it'd be good bag-partner with a can of baked beans.

    Thanks again for the smile!

    ~Lori
    www.lorimoon.com

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  25. VENT...NICOLE!!!!

    Let it RIP!

    GO GIRL!!!

    Oh man...I would have been PISSED TOO!

    And I ALSO would have done exactly as you did....CALLED THE STORE TO MAKE A COMPLAINT!!!

    BRAVA to you, for doing that!

    Ya know...by writing this post, I've realize that it's not just ME...that other people have this happen and it annoyes them too!

    ooooh....hey, and you gave me a great idea about getting an insulated bag for my frozen things!! Being that I have to walk so far, it's a royal bitch in the summer, because by the time I get home all my frozen stuff is thawed!!!

    GRRRRRRRR!!

    So glad you vented and got that off your chest, Nicole!

    Feel free to do that anytime!

    And thanks for adding your experience to this post!!!

    Thanks for stopping by!

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  26. Good Evening Linda!

    Oh...we're not OLD...

    ...we're just RIPE!

    HAHAHAHHA!

    And I think it's exactly what you shared here....

    ....I don't think the baggers are properly trained from the start.

    But I also think that some things would common sense, ya know? I mean, COLD with COLD?!?!?

    Anyway...it was fun venting about this, and I discovered that other people have this same thing happen to them!

    BTW...lately I've heard from other people too, that their computers seem to be REALLY SLOW!!!!!

    Also, I think I may need to add more memory to this computer. It has Vista software and it needs ALOT of memory to run properly. The updates on this software are horrendous. I get at least 4 or 5 a week!!

    GRRRRRRR!

    Anyway...no worries, one night I'll just stop by your blog with a glass of red wine and WAIT for the page to download.

    tee, hee!

    Thanks SO MUCH for stopping by, Linda!

    It's ALWAYS a joy sharing with ya!!

    Blessings to you too!

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  27. Good Evening Miss Jones!

    AHHHHHH, yes....and don't you freaking LOVE when they shake the carbonated stuf?????

    You can almost anticipate the GEYSER that will shoot forth, the second you open your first can!!!

    ssssssprttttittttsssss!

    And OMG....I use to shop at an Albertson's when I lived in Florida, so I KNOW WHAT YOU MEAN!!!

    I too prefer Trader Joes, and I KNOW I should go GREEN, but I can't help it...I LOVE PAPER!!!

    (you remember my past post, right?)

    However...I DO RECYCLE the bags...so I'm partially green!

    HAHAHAHAHAA!

    Anyway, my dear friend...thanks A LOT for dropping by and sharing!

    You always make me LAUGH.

    And thank you for that!

    Ok...I'll write the book and will be sure to stop in California during my book tour!!

    We'll do lunch!

    Ciao bella!

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  28. Greetings Lori!

    Welcome!

    Thanks for stopping by and taking the time to comment.

    Nice meeting you!

    Well...I'm 53, so maybe your the same age...but as soon as you said WONDER BREAD, I had a vision of my mother ALWAYS grabbing that off the grocery shelf. We were a total WONDER BREAD FAMILY!!

    HAHAHAHA!

    So glad you enjoyed this post.

    Please stop by anytime, Lori!

    Have a great evening!

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  29. Don't the have a baggers training class 101A or something??!! I swear-- those baggers-- union workers... get some big bucks compared to other jobs that of that level... I remember back when I was a teenager thinking that being a store bagger was a cake job and you could even make double pay for holidays!!! It doesn't take brains.. Heavy stuff in first... etc... I think people that do the job may not really even care about what they are doing!!!

    In France, there is NO such thing as a bagger... The customer bags there own groceries... I've NEVER seen a bagger or even a cashier who bags stuff while I have lived here... I think the concept just doesn't exist... differences in customer service, perhaps.... : ) Also, most people here bring there own bags to the store because most stores (not all, though) don't give you bags, or it costs for a bag.. PLUS, they're really green here about that...

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  30. Bonjour Leesa!

    SEE!!!!

    I would do FABULOUS Europe!!!

    Not only do I like to bag my own groceries, but I enjoy shopping like a european...

    ...every couple of days!

    Everything is FRESH!!!

    But wow...you have to PAY for a bag if you want one??

    But, hey...I guess that's a GREAT way to make everyone go GREEN!!!

    It would ME!!!!

    Maybe I'll make that my New Years Goal...

    GO GREEN RON!!!

    Thanks for stopping by and sharing, Leesa!

    Your presence is ALWAYS enjoyed!!!!

    Have a great weekend!

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  31. Yes I agree but before you do that can you please do a presentation at my local store. There is nothing like having smashed egg yoke all over your cart before you leave the store. And the dumbfound look on their face as they didn't know that a gallon of milk could cruse a carton of eggs!

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  32. Howdy Domestic Diva!

    Absolutely!!!

    In fact, I have a special chapter in this book about the proper way to bag EGGS!!!

    Apparently EGGS are getting the the worst crusing of all!!!

    Poor little things!

    Kind of reminds me of Humpty-Dumpty!

    HAHAHAHAHA!

    Always GREAT seeing ya, Diva!

    Thanks for stopping by this evening!

    Have a wonderful weekend!

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