Please Bear With Me



Please don’t call the Sigmund Freud Hotline after you read this….

For as long as I can remember, I’ve always maintained a childlike belief that stuffed animals are living and breathing entities.

By that I mean, I think of them as having internal organs and emotional feelings.

For instance…

I remember the day when I decided to purchase my very first GUND Teddy Bear to had to my collection. And if any of you have ever touched or held a Gund, you know what I mean when I say how wonderfully soft and cuddly they are.

Let me interject here by saying that I don’t have a HUGE teddy bear collection, nor do I concoct imaginary tea parties with lacy napkins; serving them scones with lemon curd. However, I do enjoy looking at them and occasionally cannot resist kissing them on their fuzzy little heads.

The day I bought my first Gund, was the day I realized I was perhaps a tad eccentric.

After the stupid-ass cashier in the gift shop finished ringing my sale, she proceeded to COLDLY grab my teddy bear by the feet and fling him into the shopping bag so that his head was at the bottom and his little legs were sticking out of the top.

I GASPED!

And without even thinking I looked at her and said, “For god's sake…all the blood will rush to his head and he won’t be able to BREATH in there like that.”

I immediately grabbed the bag from her and gently took the teddy bear by his feet, flipping him right-side up so that his head would be at opening of the bag.

The cashier just stared at me with a please-get-this-lunatic-out-of-the-store look on her face and said….

“Aaaaalrighty, now….thank for your purchase, Sir. NEXT IN LINE, PLEASE!”

I walked away from her; whispering to the teddy bear, “You poor little thing.”


And another for instance….

One day while I was at work, I just so happen to spot a stuffed baby tiger lying on the hard tile floor in my department. It still had the price tag on, so I knew it had probably been dropped by a shopper who was planning to purchase it from our toy department on the third floor.

The minute I saw it I ran over and picked it up like a tigress protecting one of her injured cubs.

I told one of my sales associates that I needed to leave the floor immediately so I could return the tiger to it’s family.

And the funny thing is, that while I was riding the escalator I was cradling it lovely and scratching it under it’s chin.

WTF???

Perhaps I need psychiatric intervention.

Or perhaps I’m really a teddy bear...with a little boy inside.




Have a Beary nice weekend everyone!

38 comments

  1. If you work with people you have to be patient and have tact. I will never forget I had a man and his partner come in who had a ratty elephant that he carried. He told me the story of this elephant-a gift from his grandmother- went with him from foster home to foster home to foster home. He wanted to get it a lei or something Hawaiian to wear. I forget what he got; I wanted to cry after I heard the story, I didn't, but it was a good feeling to know that I helped make him and his elephant happy. They were an absolute joy. So kind and pleasant.

    THEN you get the kind of people like I had tonight.
    Blonde girl goes "so what is SS?"
    Me: "extra small". B.G.: "Do clothes go by weight?" Me: "no. They go SS/S/M..." B.G.: "yes they do!" Then B.G.'s zitty boyfriend pops in and asks me "what is the Pan Pacific Festival about?" B.G. goes "oh *she* doesn't know!" I let that comment go, but wished I could've 'informed' them that's the festival where we sacrifice bitchy Caucasian people to the volcano god.

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  2. You are a lunatic LOL. I was rolling in laughter with that damn Teddy Bear story. I'm amazed you didn't bitch slap the cashier. This is too funny. I don't even think kids have this fascination with stuffed animals as you do. Well maybe they do now that I think about it. My niece loves 'em. As long as your not dressing them up and taking them out to tea parties with ya...you go boy :) Aloha

    PS...I'm still laughing about this. You crack me up

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  3. Hey there Ron,

    So nice of you to take that stray tiger back up to his section.
    Awwwhhh.

    ( that was a Kodak moment ;) )
    This is not connected to your cute & cuddlies, but I have a habit in the supermarket of picking up fallen packages off the floor & putting them back up.

    Not my job, but I hate to see perfectly good items down there, only to be crushed by a clutz.

    You are a sweet man, Ronalso :)

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  4. OH Ron, if I were a teddy bear I would want to live with YOU!!!

    Everything is energy. So therefore, yes, even stuffed bears have something about them that is magical. I think it's wonderful that you are so caring and loving.

    I don't have a Gund bear, so I can only imagine how soft and cuddly it is. But I do have a nice bear upstairs that hubby got as a free gift when he bought me some jewelry years ago. It just sits on the shelf. I thought maybe I'd give it to my grandson. But now, I clearly see that I must spend a little time with him. Maybe when I'm having a creative block while working I could give him a cuddle and he could be my inspiration bear or something.

    Happy Friday!
    Have a magically warm and fuzzy weekend. You're a beary special friend. :)

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  5. Oh how I love you!

    I saw a little bear in a shop window and knew my nephew would love him. when I went in to buy him I realized he was holding hands with an exact duplicate - I could not bear (hehe) to separate them so I bought both.

    for a spell my nephew's bear used to send cards to my bear :)

    it's cool and rainy - isn't it wonderful!!

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  6. OMG, Debi...was a sweet story!

    Hell, I almost cry hearing you tell it. So glad you were able to help them, sweet lady!

    And holy shit....I HOWLED at your respone to couple #2!!!!

    You GO, girl!!

    And being in retail myself, I SO know what you mean about patience and tact. Sometimes I have it and other times I have to count to 10 - oy vey!

    Great seeing ya, Deb!

    Thanks for sharing!

    Enjoy your weekend!

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  7. Aloha Thom!

    Last night while I was writing this post, I actually started laughing at myself!

    I will NEVER forget the expression on the sales girl face when I reacted to the way she bagged my teddy bear! It was like, "ARE YOU FOR REAL???????????"

    No...I don't dress them up, but I do buy them gifts at Christmas time!

    hahahaahahahaha!

    I think this is WHY I love kids so much...

    ...because I AM one!

    Always greating seeing ya, Thom!

    Thanks for BEARING with me!

    Aloha,
    Teddy Ruksbin

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  8. Bonjour Barbara!

    OMG...your comment made me laugh, because I TOO am FOREVER picking stuff off the floor in stores!!!

    Not only in grocery stores, but also clothes. Whenever I walk to the restroom at work and see stuff that's fallen off the hanger, I pick them up and re-hang them!

    Even BRA'S in the lingerie department!!

    tee, hee!

    Thanks for stopping by, Barb!

    I'll think of you the next time I pick something up.

    Have a VUNDERBAR weekend!

    X to you and Didier!

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  9. Howdy Crystal Chick!

    Hey...you are SOOOO correct in saying that everything has energy, so maybe THAT'S why I feel the way I do.

    I remember once, going to a store called Build-a-Bear. And if you could have seen me reacting to all the little bear accessories you would have DIED! The store even allowed you to choose a HEART that you could place inside the bear. OMG...it was so CUTE!

    Shhhh...don't tell anyone this, but I will sometimes cuddle in bed with one of my bears as I sleep! Especially in the winter when it's cold!

    If you're ever out at the mall and spot a store that carries GUNDS, just pick one up and feel it...it's like no other stuffed animal you've ever held. They actually feel REAL!

    Thanks so much for dropping by, M!

    You're a Beary special friend too!

    Happy Friday!

    And don't you love all this FALLish weather we're getting???

    It's perfect BEAR weather!

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  10. Hi Dianne!

    OMG...that is SOOOO damn CUTE!!!

    And to tell you the truth, I would have done the same thing! I mean, what if they were bear-brothers or something and then they missed one another if you had only bought the one???

    HAHHAHAHAHAHAA!

    See...I think of these things too!

    CRAZY people we are!

    But I LOVE it!

    You have no idea how many times I've thought of you enjoying this weather with me! Doesn't it feel like Fall? Shit...I hope it stays this way all Summer!

    Have a wondeful weekend, Dianne!

    Love ya too!

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  11. you're not so strange. i guess i kind of felt the same way and thought it was normal until you pointed out that it might not be. i do tend to keep the stuff animals turned the right way and i won't lean on them because i feel like i'm crushing them. maybe susan boyle has room for us. we need a break today.

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  12. You're not mad Ron you're just a big softee and I love you for it! :)

    I have five bears, all very different and all very special. When I get a minute I'll take a photo of them and do a blog post. Why don't you do the same, I for one would love to see you(r) bear(s) - LOL sorry couldn't resist!

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  13. Holy hell... what a post to fist see when discovering a new blog.

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  14. Of course I didn't say it...I was thinking it.

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  15. Hey Valerie!

    So great to see ya!

    OMG...that is so cute! You won't lean on them because you don't want to crush them!

    BRAVO!...I feel the same way!

    And you're right...we ARE normal. It's the non-believer that aren't!

    HA!

    Thanks for stopping, Val!

    Great to see you blogging again!

    Please tell your stuffed animals that I said, HI!

    Enjoy your weekend!

    Teddy

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  16. bwhahahahahahahaha!

    That was GREAT Akelamalu!

    Very clever, you are!

    Hey...and great idea you gave me too! oooo....I can't wait to see you(r) bear(s)!

    ha!

    Thanks for stopping by, dear lady!

    Always a delight!

    Have a beary nice weekend!

    Ted
    X

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  17. Hi Cunning linguist!

    Greetings...thanks for stoppping by!

    Hey, I think I've seen you over at some of the others blogs I visit, so it's nice finally meeting you!

    I know...I'm in love with teddy bears....

    ....what can I say?

    HA!

    Stop by anytime...you're always welcomed!

    Enjoy your weekend.

    P.S. and I love your blog name, that's great!

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  18. Aloha Debi!

    That's folks...

    ...she was only THINKING it!

    You're a riot, Deb!
    X

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  19. ronnie: Yes, honey you are a wonderful loveable teddy bear with a boy inside. hehehe

    I call you ronnie bear. And anyone know that a ronnie bear is way better than a teddy bear. woo.

    you rock my dear friend. Sorry If I seemed aloof...

    I'm better now...those electric shock treatments work wonders and a cool way to pop popcorn.

    Have a wonderful weekend ronnie...

    ciao baby. You rock.

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  20. Hey Ron - That photo you chose of the molting bear is one of the most disturbing things upon which I've stumbled. It looks like some kind of crossed species in a disturbing state of disrobe.

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  21. ....those electric shock treatments work wonders and a cool way to pop popcorn...

    bwhahahahahahahaha!

    Holy shit Miss Jones...that was hysterical!!

    You're so sweet, my friend. Hey, I like that...Ronnie Bear! I think that's what I'll have the people at work start calling me too!

    (of course...only the people I REALLY like)

    HA!

    So glad to hear you're feeling well, sweets. And you don't seem aloof at all, you've just got something on your mind, that's all and I TOTALLY understand, believe me.

    Thanks for dropping by.

    Have an awesome weekend.

    Ciao bella
    X

    Ronnie Bear

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  22. Hey...MVD...you're descriptions of things always make me laugh!!

    That was GREAT!

    And it is disturbing isn't it?

    When I first saw it, I couldn't tell if it was a bear in a bear costume, or a human in a bear costume because it has a belly button!

    It looks like something out of a SCI-FI film where someone is taking their skin off!

    Always great seeing ya, bud!

    Enjoy your weekend!

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  23. oh ron, this just tickled me... you have a little boy's heart in a grown up man's body and there is nothing i love more!

    xoxoxo to you and have a wonderful cuddly weekend...kiss each one of your children for me!

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  24. Hi Linda!

    Thank you, sweet lady!

    And I'll be sure to give my teddy's a kiss for you, just as soon I tuck them into bed and read them a bedtime story.

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!

    Have a beary wonderful weekend!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and I hope you're feeling better.

    Sending ya Reiki!!!!!

    X ya!

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  25. Oh.... I totally agree with you! I LOVE stuffed animals and GUNDs are my FAV!! Gotta getta GUND!! They are sooo realistic and well made and the teddy bears are to die for! Sooooo soft!!! During my first year of college, living in the dorms on campus, I had a teddy bear that I LOVED!!!!! I used to dress him up and take him to the cafeteria with me all the time...
    Well, one day, he fell out of my friends car when we parked and I didn't realize it until later on... I never found him, and I was absolutely heart-broken... I even put up LOST signs all over campus, but no one turned him in.... It was really heart-breaking!!!\

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  26. When I get done laughing about Mr. Cunning Linguists' remark, I'll letcha know. *laughing*

    .............k.........

    So.
    I see I'm the only other brave and honest soul here....
    (Sheeeeeshhhh....)

    There's a right way and a wrong way to place a bear IN a bag for making the journey home with you. Head first ain't it!
    SHAME on that lady!!

    And of course they have interal organs AND feelings. AND loads of character! Good grief......everybody knows that!!!!

    Mr. Stuffy Bear sits on the bed AND THE BRIT LETS HIM.
    Woe to him if he did NOT.

    ...so THERE!!
    HA!

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  27. OMG...Leesa...I FEEL for you because I would have been the same way!!!

    It know this sounds insane, but it would feel like loosing a PERSON!

    Sorry you didn't find him, but perhaps someone else did and gave him a good home!

    Aren't Gunds the BEST?? There's is nothing like them!

    It's so good to hear that someone else feels the same way I do about our fuzzy friends!

    tee, hee!

    Love ya, dear lady...hope you're enjoying a wonderful weekend.

    It's been raining here a lot, but today it's sunny and a bit warmer. I can't wait to get out there and enjoy the day!

    Thanks for stopping by!

    X

    Ronnie Bear

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  28. Hey Mel!

    I know, my toy-loving friend...not EVERYONE understands the life of a stuffed animal like us, do they?

    Actually, I thought his comment was funny!

    You're darn right...there IS a right way and wrong way to place a bear into a bag!!! And I certainly let her know it.

    The NERVE of her!!

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    Please tell Mr. Stuffy Bear that my bears say Hi, ok?

    Hey, maybe if you and I meet some day, we can have a TEA PARTY!

    Thanks for stopping by, sweet lady

    Enjoy your weekend!

    X ya!

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  29. Long time reader, first time commenting.

    Three bears live at my apartment (no not those three bears - LOL). There names are Garbo, Clementine & Zuzu. Garbo is named after Greta, Clementine gets her name from the song and Zuzu is from that Jimmy Stewart Christmas movie.

    And I'm almost fifty and all three bears were acquired after I turned 25.

    My childhood bear, who was white, was dyed pink and then lost.

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  30. Hi Gigi!

    Welcome!

    Thank you SO MUCH for stopping by and sharing a comment - it's GREAT to meet you!

    OMG...that is SOOOO CUTE!

    It's wonderful to meeting someone who shares the same LOVE of bears that I do!

    I LOVE how you came up with the name Zuzu!! I actually happen to own that film and will sometimes watch it throughout the year just because it makes me feel so good!

    Oh...and GRET GARBO...how cool is that???

    Very ingenious you are!

    aawww...I'm so sorry to hear about loosing your childhood bear. Isn't it something how we get attached to them like our own children?

    Anway...again, thank you for stopping by and sharing your bear story - I LOVED it!

    Drop by anytime.

    Have a great weekend!

    Teddy
    X

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  31. I also give my stuffed animals anthropomorphic qualities. I collect Teddy bears and weird stuffed rabbits. I won't put my Teddies by my Living Dead Dolls because I'm afraid they'll get scared.

    Ron, do you think we need therapy? :/

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  32. bwhahahahahaha....

    OMG, Nitebyrd you KILL ME and I LOVE YOU!!!!

    You're a riot!!

    I laughed to hard at your comment, I thought I would shit!

    And no...we DO NOT need therapy, we're just ALIENS that come from another planet!

    And BTW...you already KNOW that I gave the troll you gave me a name...Nikki...and I LOVE her! She sits on a shelf above my computer so I can see her all the time.

    Thanks for sharing, Sis!

    You're the BEST!

    X ya!

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  33. I can't believe that salesgirl didn't even wrap your bear in tissue. It was a GUND, for goodness sake! Gotta Get a Gund.

    I had a stuffed monkey that I took with me to work about 5 years ago and my staff thought it would be funny to kidnap it and leave a ransom note. I was not amused.

    Would you kidnap someone's child and leave a note?!?

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  34. Hi Chrissy!

    I KNOW...the NERVE of her!!!

    A Gund deserves SPECIAL treatment!

    HAHAHAHAHA!

    Omg...I can't believe they did that to you! I bet you FLIPPED! I'm surprised they didn't charge you with a ransom fee to get it back!

    Btw, I have a monkey too. A friend of mine gave him to me before I moved back to Philly. He actually makes a cute little monkey sound when you press on his tummy!

    Thanks for stopping by Chrissy!

    Hope you had a MARVI weekend!
    X

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  35. You are a scream LOL...I just crack up everytime I read something by you. By them Christmas gifts...LOL...does the tooth fairy stop by? LOL

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  36. Aloha Thom!

    Yes...in fact, when one of my bears lost both their eye teeth, the tooth fairy left him $20.00!

    *I used it to buy him a new fleece blanket!

    bwhahahahaahaha!

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  37. I have to tell you,
    I fell over laughing.
    You would have hated me as a kid,
    I once totured the bratty little sister of a friend, by convincing her that the dolls in her sisters room were alive.
    ( i hid a tape recorder under the covers and all it played where breathing sounds with an occasional sigh.
    I said they were all nice except the one whose eyes she washed off with clorox, it was EVIL so then one night when I was sleeping over i snuck in and put the doll on the floor in her room with it's arms up like it was coming to get her...
    yeah...I was a total shit as a kid..
    hell i am still pretty ornery as an adult!
    (((hugs Mr. teddy bear man!!!!))))

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  38. OMG...Lady Sorrow!!!!

    YOU ARE HYSTERICAL!!!!

    That was BRILLIANT!

    clap...clap...clap!!!!

    BRAVO!

    I don't think that's being a total shit at all. In fact, it's something I think I would have done...and loved doing it!

    Thanks for the wonderful laugh, you wild woman you!

    LOVED IT!

    {{{{{{X ya!}}}}}}

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