Monday, January 25, 2010

Ok, I Thought I’d Seen Everything

You would think that after living in New York City for five years, I would have seen everything that could possibly shock the hell out of me.

Um....apparently I haven’t.

Yesterday when I got into work, one of my fellow-employees showed me something that she found sitting in the candy section of the store.

She immediately came running over to me screeching at the top of her lungs, “Oh Ron, look….you’re gonna LOVE this!”

And the sick part was that as soon as I saw it, all I kept thinking was “OMG….this is gonna make a great blog post!”

Now, what I found very peculiar about this item is that it was included within the Valentine’s Day candy.

I still can’t wrap my brain around the reason why they were selling a candy dispenser in the shape of cow, that dispenses candy pellets out of it’s ASS.

I’m wondering….

….what exactly does this have to do with LOVE?

And to top it all off, the cow makes a MOO sound that actually sounds like one of the munchkins from the Wizard of Oz having an earth-shattering orgasm when you press on it’s back, as it PLOPS out a bright-colored TURD into a silver milk container.



Isn’t that special?

And doesn't that make you just wanna pop it into your mouth?

Well….

I guess this gift would be perfect for someone who you love so much that you could just SHIT.