On Being A Generous Receiver


We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give.
--Winston Churchill

Earlier this week, one of my longtime fellow-Libra friends, Mel, over at Mels Dream, shared something that inspired me to write this post. In fact, she’s always sharing delightful tidbits of inspiration on her blog that causes me to reflect.

So grazie mille, dear lady…..x

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Mel shared a very thought-provoking post on giving.

However, it was this last sentence that really struck a chord within.

“In our generosity, we also learn to receive others' gifts to us with humility and respect.”

And the reason it hit home for me was because I’ve always felt comfortable in giving, but not so much when it came to receiving.

Yet, I’ve since discovered that it’s equally important to be a generous receiver, as it is a generous giver.

Mel’s post reminded me of a time in my life when I went through financial bankruptcy and was supported by family and friends, who reached out and helped me tremendously. In fact, if it wasn’t for them I wouldn’t have made it.

But I’ve got to tell you, it wasn’t easy to accept their generosity.

One, I was too ashamed. And two, I somehow felt that it was wrong to accept their giving.

You see, I grew up in a generation where we were instilled that it’s always better to give than receive.

And why? Well, because it was selfish to take.

But what I’ve learned is that it’s selfish not to take.

If you really think about it, receiving is actually giving because you’re giving the giver the opportunity to pay forward a kind gesture that may have at one time been given to them.

To me, giving and receiving are a Universal balance.

If someone is always giving and not receiving, then the balance becomes imbalanced.

However, giving and receiving is not about keeping tabs, no. What I mean by balance is that if the time ever comes when you feel a calling to help someone, or give them a gift, or even support them with something as simple as a kind word in an email or a phone call, then by all means do.

But at the same time, we must graciously allow others to give to us in return.

And then say, “Thank you.” And openly receive it.

It’s a Universal balance.

Kinda like a circle......




Wishing you a beautiful weekend everyone!

X

57 comments

  1. Hi Ronnie and Hi Mel!

    If anyone has not had the pleasure to enjoy Mel's blog, do yourself a favor and go and have a look. She says some thoughts that are right on the money.

    I think that I have also been taught that it is better to give. I can see that working in me culturally, also.
    Curiously, I am lossening up with age on what concerns the receiving part. Yes Ronnie; being able to receive is selfish. That means that I do not value your thought towards me and the kindness that was intended.

    Thank you for sharing your thoughts behind Mel's post. I have recieved your gift and give you back a hug (((((Ron)))))

    Happy weekend!



    I agree with you, Ron, that giving back dosen't have to always be monetary.

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  2. This was a very inspirational post Ron! Thank you for sharing this with us. You are right!!

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  3. Good post, Ron. I grew up with the lesson 'it's better to give than to receive' and I now know how wrong that is. It's wrong to mentally reject a gift and bring pain to the giver. It's hurtful. Even if we don't reject it with words they can sense our embarrassment and the pleasure they had in choosing the gift can immediately be ruined. I use the word embarrassment because that's what I feel is the underlying reason for not wanting to receive. Whether it be a gift or a compliment, we should graciously accept.

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  4. Like you I have always found it easier and more pleasurable to give than to receive but you are correct one should accept help/gifts with a smile and a thankyou. :)

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  5. So true, Ron! Think of when someone gives you a Xmas gift, but you don't have anything for them. Instead of enjoying the fact that someone gave you a gift because they WANTED to and it made them HAPPY to find something special for you, you sit there and worry about not having something to give them in return.

    Great post to think about over the weekend.......have a good one, Ron!

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  6. I gotta tell ya......I still struggle being the receiver. Being able to humbly and gracious accept things that are gifted me--still takes effort.
    I'm the last person to open prezzies--too busy watching others be joyful in their receiving. They make it look easy when it still feels awkward to me.

    Asking for something from another? Yeah....well, there's another one I'm still working on. Pride and ego, I'm sure. I like being self sufficient, self reliant, self supporting. I can hear WPIML--'SELF, SELF, SELF...aint' ALL about YOUYOUYOU".....LOL And I've had a whole string of lessons about 'cheating others out of the opportunity to give and help'.
    And yes, I get equally sad when I discover someone failed to give me information/ask for help because they were ashamed or scared or too overwhelmed.

    I know that one--it took me darn near a week to let anyone around me know of the struggles the sister is having. I could do it here, with all of you.......but I failed to do it in other places. I actually paused before sending an email to people at the worksite, asking for prayers... for her.
    WHATTHEheckwasthatabout?! I'd blame 'overwhelmed', but I believe the truth would be "I didn't want to look like I couldn't handle something or like I needed something"..... OH my gosh--Prayers? For a woman I love dearly--and I hesitated?! Somehow it got twisted to be about me. I'm not happy with me about that one, but there you have it. *sigh* Obviously I'm not done growing yet.

    You're right about the circle of giving/receiving. And I like the photo of the circle of hands. I need to embed that in my brain when I start to struggle in letting people help me or letting myself NEED something from others.
    Maybe they make giant sticky notes that I could attach to my forehead so it wouldn't fall out of my brain.
    Or maybe it's just necessary that this human being gets to do it imperfectly so I can walk humbly under the grace of G-d, huh?

    ((((((((((((( Ron ))))))))))))))
    Betcha didn't know this post was about me when ya posted it--did ya....LOLOL

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  7. Excellent post, Ron. I've been thinking about this very thing for a few days. Two days ago I found an old diary and dated Christmas Eve 1998, I'd written about how a very wise woman told me I was a giver and I didn't know how to receive and I should work on that. I remember as a child my mother would never allow me to accept things from others, if a family friend offered me something I'd look up to her and I'd see by the look in her eyes or the position of her lips whether or not I could accept. Funny that something like that would remain in the back of my head. I truly enjoy giving, and over the past few years I've learn to receive with grace or at least I'm working on it!

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  8. Rob LenihanJanuary 27, 2012

    Excellent post, Ron. You're so right about our generation being unable to accept anything. (Except misery--Catholics are especially good at that.) Maybe people are afraid of appearing weak or needy but we all wind up in that situation at some point or other in our lives. So take help, be thankful, and pass it on. As my old Italian grandmother used to say when we sat down to dinner, "eat more than you want!" Have a great weekend, buddy!

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  9. Bonjour Barbara~

    "If anyone has not had the pleasure to enjoy Mel's blog, do yourself a favor and go and have a look. She says some thoughts that are right on the money."

    Ditto, Barb! I totally agree! And often VERY much thoughts that are perfect for what I need to hear at that exact moment.

    "Curiously, I am lossening up with age on what concerns the receiving part."

    Me too, yet I still struggle with it at times, hearing that voice in my head saying, "It's selfish to take."

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this post, my friend. You've added MUCH!

    ((((( Barb ))))))

    Happy weekend!!!!!'

    X

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  10. Good morning Jeanne~

    You are so welcome, dear lady. And thank YOU for stopping by!

    Have a wonderful weekend!

    X

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  11. Good morning Valerie~

    "Even if we don't reject it with words they can sense our embarrassment and the pleasure they had in choosing the gift can immediately be ruined. I use the word embarrassment because that's what I feel is the underlying reason for not wanting to receive."

    Embarrassment. You used the PERFECT word, because that is what I sometimes feel when it comes to receiving. Almost like I'm unworthy (embarrassed) of receiving. In fact, there were times when I said to the giver, "No, no, no....I cannot receive this"; hurting the feelings of the giver.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and adding your thoughts to this post, dear lady. You are spot on!

    Have a terrific weekend!

    X

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  12. Good morning Akelamalu~

    "....one should accept help/gifts with a smile."

    Yup....you're correct!

    Thank you for stopping by, m'dear. And thank you for adding your words to this post!

    Have a wonderful weekend!

    X

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  13. This reminded me of a book I won at a lecture. It's called 'The Power of Receiving' by Amanda Owen and in the very beginning she speaks of how we are not taught to receive or know how to balance both giving and receiving. So eventually we just become multitaskers who are taking care of everyone else's needs. It causes alot of suffering.

    Regarding this post: I've 'received' the information in it and THANK YOU for for allowing me to take what you've written and use it to remind myself to be more open and balanced. :)

    Love the last photo!

    Have a terrific weekend, Ron.

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  14. Hey there Bijoux~

    "Think of when someone gives you a Xmas gift, but you don't have anything for them. Instead of enjoying the fact that someone gave you a gift because they WANTED to and it made them HAPPY to find something special for you, you sit there and worry about not having something to give them in return."

    Yes! Yes! Yes! That's a PERFECT example of what I mean. In fact, that was something my mother use to worry about when we were kids at Christmas time. She had a box in the closet for 'emergency presents' just in case someone gave her a gift.

    Instead of just accepting it, and then at some other time giving them a gift when you felt like it, we worry about immediately returning the gesture.

    Thanks a BUNCH for stopping by and adding your thoughts to this post. You've added MUCH!

    Have a GREAT weekend, my friend!

    X

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  15. Hey there Rob~

    "You're so right about our generation being unable to accept anything. (Except misery--Catholics are especially good at that.)"

    HAHHAHAHAHAHAHA! OMG, how ironic that you mentioned "Catholic" because I was actually going to add something to this post in saying that growing up going to Catholic school instilled such GUILT in receiving! And yes, MISERY!

    " Maybe people are afraid of appearing weak or needy but we all wind up in that situation at some point or other in our lives. So take help, be thankful, and pass it on."

    Excellent point! Because I that's exactly what I felt in taking help during my financial struggles - weak and needy.

    Isn't it something how we can openly and freely help others who might be in need, however when it comes to RECEIVING help, we feel embarrassed about it.

    "As my old Italian grandmother used to say when we sat down to dinner, "eat more than you want!"

    HAHAHHAHAHAHAHA! OMG....I LOVE THAT!!!! Didn't you just love growing up Italian and hearing all those sayings? Especially when it came to FOOD.

    You brought up some wonderful points on this topic, Rob. So thank you!

    Have a great weekend, buddy!

    X

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  16. Gooooood morning SuziCate~

    "I remember as a child my mother would never allow me to accept things from others, if a family friend offered me something I'd look up to her and I'd see by the look in her eyes or the position of her lips whether or not I could accept. "

    OMG...I could have written that myself because it was the same for me as a child.

    I think some of us are taught not to receive, not only because it's selfish, but also because it puts us in a position of 'obligation.'

    "Keeping tabs."

    However, I've gotten to the point where I know that one day the time will come when I will just FEEL the calling to reciprocate the giving that that person gave to me, whether it be to them, or someone else. Because giving doesn't necessarily have to go directly BACK to the giver.

    Thanks ever so much for stopping by and sharing on this post topic, my friend. LOVED your thoughts!

    Have a wonderful weekend.......X

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  17. Hiya Mel~

    "I gotta tell ya......I still struggle being the receiver. Being able to humbly and gracious accept things that are gifted me--still takes effort."

    Meeeeee too, dear lady. Me too.

    "Asking for something from another? Yeah....well, there's another one I'm still working on. Pride and ego, I'm sure. I like being self sufficient, self reliant, self supporting."

    OMG...I SO hear ya on that one because that's how I felt when asking for help when I went through bankruptcy. It just KILLED me to ask for help because of my pride and ego. However, it taught me to be humble and that's it's okay to feel weak because admitting to weakness is actually strength.

    "but I believe the truth would be "I didn't want to look like I couldn't handle something or like I needed something"....."

    Ditto, same here.

    Thank you, Mel. And not only for your beautiful comment, but for also being a HUGE source of inspiration for me.

    ((((((( You ))))))))

    X ya bunches!

    P.S. and know that I continue to share my prayers and energy with your sister.

    ((((( Sister )))))

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  18. Good morning Mary~

    ...."So eventually we just become multitaskers who are taking care of everyone else's needs. It causes alot of suffering. "

    Sounds like an AWESOME book! And I will look for it the next time I'm in Barnes & Noble. Thanks so much for sharing that, as you do so many wonderful bits of information!

    And you are so welcome, my friend.

    ((( You )))

    Have a terrific weekend!

    X

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  19. ..."We make a living by what we get, but we make a life by what we give."
    -Amen that. :o)

    ...You and I are so alike in so many ways it is well, uncanny. You once again, have hit the nail square on the head. I too was raised that receiving was selfish and almost taboo. I remember that feeling of dread when I knew someone was about to give me something because I felt bad and I always thought immediately, "now how can I reciprocate?" instead of basking in the moment with this person on them giving me something. It is still ingrained in me to be that type of receiver but at almost a half a century of age I'm finally able to change that. Mostly. ;o)

    ...Thank you for this thought provoking post dear. You always leave me here either pondering something life changing or laughing. Which btw, how's Barbie? ;o)

    ...Now off to Mel's.

    ...Have a fab' weekend! (((you)))

    ...Blessings :o)

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  20. Good morning dear TJ~

    "...You and I are so alike in so many ways it is well, uncanny."

    Isn't it something how we so often migrate toward other bloggers who share the same thoughts and feelings? And it's the same for me to you - uncanny.

    (((( You )))))

    "I remember that feeling of dread when I knew someone was about to give me something because I felt bad and I always thought immediately, "now how can I reciprocate?" instead of basking in the moment with this person on them giving me something."

    Exactly! And I too have felt that very same thing instead of basking in the moment with that person on them giving me something.

    Isn't odd how we do that?

    "It is still ingrained in me to be that type of receiver but at almost a half a century of age I'm finally able to change that. Mostly."

    Good for you. And as I shared in my comment to Mel, I too struggle at times to change that. Mostly.

    Thank you a whole bunch for stopping by and sharing your sweet energy on this post, dear friend. And thank you for your kind words.

    Glad you'll be stopping by Mels. She and I have blogging together ever since I started this blog. You're gonna LOVE her!

    Have a fab weekend!

    X

    P.S. Barbie is doing faaaaaaaaabulous! We had lunch yesterday at an outside cafe. However, I can imagine why everyone on the street was STARING at us. Bwhahahahahhahahaha!

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  21. Pamela D HartJanuary 27, 2012

    You see, I grew up in a generation where we were instilled that it’s always better to give than receive.

    And why? Well, because it was selfish to take.


    Ron, I think that most people feel that way. I know I used to. It was only after healing and growing did I learn that receiving with grace was actually a gift to the giver!

    Imagine how the gift-giver feels when we say “You shouldn’t have” or “This is too much”. We are REJECTING them! They wouldn’t have given us a gift had they not wanted to!

    If anyone gives us a gift, whether it’s a physical present, or the gift of a compliment, their place in line, a smile, or money, we need to accept it with grace and say THANK YOU and like you said, pay it forward when we have the opportunity.


    To me, giving and receiving are a Universal balance.

    I completely agree!

    ((Big Hugs)) Fantastic post, Ron!

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  22. Greetings Pamela~

    "Ron, I think that most people feel that way. I know I used to. It was only after healing and growing did I learn that receiving with grace was actually a gift to the giver!"

    You said it. Receiving with grace is a gift to the giver!

    "Imagine how the gift-giver feels when we say “You shouldn’t have” or “This is too much”. We are REJECTING them! They wouldn’t have given us a gift had they not wanted to! "

    You're right because I can't tell you HOW MANY times I've actually said that, "You shouldn't have" or "This is too much."

    "we need to accept it with grace and say THANK YOU and like you said, pay it forward when we have the opportunity."

    (((( Pamela ))))

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this post, dear lady. You've added A LOT!

    Have a fantastic weekend!

    X

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  23. Giving and receiving are things that are challenging to our integrity and belief in life... will the good come to me that I am handing out? Will people see me as a failure if I accept help? But this is a life circle, like you said. It is here to teach us.

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  24. Bonjour Susu~

    LOVED your comment! And every word you shared is spot on!

    Ending with....

    "It is here to teach us."

    Thank you for sharing, beautiful lady! Have a super -duper weekend!

    X

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  25. ((((((((( Ron )))))))))) Yaknow--Barbie has an excellent role model.

    Dunno about being a source of inspiration--I DO know I can be a schmuck with the best of the rest! ;-)

    You're a good friend and I appreciate that more than you know.

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  26. "Dunno about being a source of inspiration--I DO know I can be a schmuck with the best of the rest! ;-)"

    You see, that in itself is an inspiration because I think we ALL can be a schmuck. HA!

    "You're a good friend and I appreciate that more than you know."

    ((((( You )))))

    And I feel the same about you.

    X ya!

    P.S. I shared some Reiki with you and your sister this afternoon. Hope you felt it.

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  27. Love this post and its funnt because Suzi & I were just talking about this very same thing.

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  28. Ron, I really enjoyed reading this post because I definitely have issues receiving, and for the reason Valerie mentioned - I get embarrassed, like I don't deserve it or something.

    But if we don't receive, then in a sense we're also not giving. You're right in saying that it's a balance. Like a circle. Thank you for sharing this today. I needed to hear it.

    Have a nice weekend, Ron!

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  29. Hola Denise~

    It's soooooooo fab seeing ya, girl. You've been missed.

    Yes, as I shared with Valerie, I too sometimes feel embarrassed about receiving, as if I'm not worthy or even feel guilty for taking it. Isn't it funny how we all at one time or another feel odd about receiving?

    Thanks oodles for stopping by, girl. Hope you had a very enjoyable vacation.

    Have a FAB weekend.....X

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  30. Hiya Peg~

    Yes, Suzi told me in her comment. How ironic that we were ALL pondering this same topic this week!

    Always great to see ya, dear friend. Hope you had a great day!

    Enjoy your weekend!!!!!!!

    X

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  31. I like to give and receive equally.

    Of course, when I say this, my mind is inevitably resting in the gutter, where it usually is.

    Let's just say a sense of reciprocity (love that word!) is prevalent (love that one, too!) in all facets (ooh, there's another good one!) of my life.

    Peace out and have a happy weekend, Ron. May it GIVE you rest and relaxation, and may you RECEIVE that with open arms.

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  32. "I like to give and receive equally.

    Of course, when I say this, my mind is inevitably resting in the gutter, where it usually is. "

    Bwhhaahahahhahahahahaahaha! MARK....you crack me the HELL up!!!
    And I LOVE your gutter mind, it's HILARIOUS!!!

    'Let's just say a sense of reciprocity (love that word!) is prevalent (love that one, too!) in all facets (ooh, there's another good one!) of my life."

    You GO, boy! And that's faaaaaaaaaaaaabulous to hear.

    Always so freakin' great to read your comments, buddy.

    Thanks for stopping by!

    Peace, Love, and Bobby Sherman...

    X

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  33. VERY wonderful post. I am not good at receiving sometimes... but more when it is something I can't afford but desperately want or need. I'm fine with Christmas type giving though. Our fellow blogger http://thegoodthebadtheworse.blogspot.com/ Linda offered to buy me something I really need - like REALLY need - to help matters around my house. I said no, I can't accept it. I should have. Linda, you are one special lady - Ron, you have to visit her! She is amazing. Why didn't I accept it? I should have! Because sometimes it is hard to receive. Just like you said. We need to let people DO what they want to DO for us sometimes. Do you know one time someone sent a $100 grocery card anonymously to me during Lent? I am sure they knew I would not accept it, but needed it desperately. That is one sneaky and wonderful way to give... and it was anonymous! Love this post Ron, are are awesome! Now go visit Linda, you will never regret it!

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  34. such a good point! And I agree about Mel - she is so full of brilliant pearls of insightfulness. Her posts stay with me and often give me pause to reflect even days later.

    And you are so right - it is only with true generosity in receiving that we can permit the giver to fully experience their joy in extending themselves through their gift.

    In my professional life, working in philanthropy, I really get this.

    But in my personal life, sort of like what you described, I'm not so good. I get flustered and embarrassed and try to make the gift experience about me rather than about the giver. It would be so much easier (and more pleasant) if I internally focused on shifting the spotlight to the giver and tried to focus on that experience.

    Thank you (and thank you Mel!) for giving me new insight - you've helped me to grow just a little bit today toward the person that I hope to become!

    much love, Diane

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  35. I grew up with that "it's better to give than to receive" stuff, too, and it took me a long time to learn the importance of being a grateful receiver. You've nailed it beautifully here, Ron. That's exactly how the Universe works. Really nice writing, my friend. Now I'm off to check out your friend, Mel.

    Have a blessed day.

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  36. Helloooooo Diane~

    Aren't Mel's post wonderful? I can't tell you how many times she posts something that's EXACTLY what I needed to hear at that moment.

    LOVE her!

    " I get flustered and embarrassed and try to make the gift experience about me rather than about the giver. It would be so much easier (and more pleasant) if I internally focused on shifting the spotlight to the giver and tried to focus on that experience."

    You brought up an EXCELLENT point - true, the gift experience often becomes about US rather than about giver - I never thought of it being that way, but it is.

    Thank you so much for stopping by and sharing your input on this post, my dear friend. You've added MUCH!

    Hope you're enjoying a super weekend. I spent the day out in burbs, enjoying a wonderful day milling about.

    Much X to you and Cristybella!

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  37. Greetings Jayne~

    So FAB to see ya, dear lady!

    Isn't it something how the things we were taught as children, stay with us as adults? And it takes years to retrain our thought patterns.

    Thanks ever so much for stopping by, Jayne. Always enjoy reading your comments!

    Hope you're having a SUPER weekend!

    X

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  38. You is so right Ron.

    Mo and I have learned to 'take' in our time too. Our pastor taught us that. We have to take as well as give, because we have to allow others to 'give' when they feel the need to help. We shouldn't rob them of that.

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  39. Hiya Babs~

    "Our pastor taught us that. We have to take as well as give, because we have to allow others to 'give' when they feel the need to help. We shouldn't rob them of that."

    I love how he said that...."we shouldn't rob them of that" because that's exactly what we're doing when we don't openly receive.

    So glad to hear that you and Mo have learned to take, because I still at times struggle with it a tiny weeny bit.

    Always wonderful to see you, my friend. Thanks for stopping by and for adding your awesome comment to this post!

    Enjoy the rest of your weekend.

    X to you and Mo!

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  40. Our pastor didn't say that, I did LOL. He just said we must learn to take as well as give. Ha ha!

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  41. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

    OMG...silly me!

    Well, brava to YOU then, because it's a GREAT saying!!!!

    X

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  42. Hey Ronnie! Hope you had a great weekend :) I am totally understanding where this post is coming from. I am absolutely the "giver" if I receive a gift without giving something in return I ALWAYS feel guilty. Whats worse is I HATE asking for financial help even from my boyfriend who lives with me! Thanks for posting this you have given me alot to think about!

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  43. Hey there Shae~

    Isn't it something how many of us feel this way about either accepting a gift without immediately giving in return, or yes, asking for help? Especially asking for help. For some reason (for me anyone) I associated asking my family and friends for help with being weak and not being responsible. Silly, isn't it?

    The experience of going through bankruptcy taught me a lot about how it could actually happen to ANYONE, and that there is nothing to be ashamed of.

    Thanks so much for stopping by this morning, girl. Always a delight to see your comments.

    Hope you're enjoying a beautiful weekend!

    X

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  44. "And then say, “Thank you.” And openly receive it."

    Sometimes I have a hard time with the second half of that sentence.

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  45. Hello dear Meleah~

    "Sometimes I have a hard time with the second half of that sentence."

    Me too, girl. And trust me, I'm STILL leaning it.

    Thanks so much for stopping by. Hope you're enjoying a wonderful Sunday!

    X

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  46. Herman TurnipJanuary 29, 2012

    I heartily agree! There was a time when I had a hard time accepting compliments. One has to learn how to be a good winner and a good loser. A good giver and a good receiver.

    Oh yeah, and an internet video like the one you produced last week doesn't help either ;-) That was genius!

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  47. Howdy Herman~

    "There was a time when I had a hard time accepting compliments."

    Thank you for bring that point up because you're absolutely right, this can pertain to receiving compliments as well.

    "One has to learn how to be a good winner and a good loser."

    Another GREAT point!

    "Oh yeah, and an internet video like the one you produced last week doesn't help either ;-) That was genius!"

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA! OMG...don't remind me because I wonder if that crazy-ass video will ever come back to HAUNT me!!!

    But thank you, buddy!

    Hope you had a flawless weekend!

    X to you, Karin, and Mr. Tyler!

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  48. whenpigsflyJanuary 31, 2012

    I completely agree with you Ron. It's a tough lesson to learn. I too have had to become gracious at receiving. I love to give and so appreciate it when someone will accept wholeheartedly.
    I love your last photo of the hands. It's just perfect!

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  49. Hey there Jen~

    "It's a tough lesson to learn."

    I agree. I've gotten much better at receiving, however I'm STILL learning :)

    So glad you liked the photo. I found it online and thought it really depicted the essence of giving and receiving.

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Hope you're having a great week!

    X

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  50. Oh yes Ron. This struck a chord with me too. I really enjoy being able to give little gifts, help etc. to people whenever I spot an opportunity but I am rubbish at recieving, but I'm working on it for exactly the reasons you and Mel outline. It's strange that it should take courage and self assurance to recieve with grace but it does. For instance, my partner and I had a lovely conversation in a coffee shop in Carnaby Street last weekend, with a young actor from Philadelphia, studying here in London; during which he mentioned the exchange rate and the price of the coffee (along with chats about Brecht and Shakespeare). When we left I gave him the price of a second cup and he really seemed embarassed but I explained that it would be kind of him to accept it from me. Now why can I see that from my side and still struggle to see that when I'm the reciever?

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  51. Greetings Jeni~

    "It's strange that it should take courage and self assurance to recieve with grace but it does."

    You're right, it does. And trust me, I'm still learning the art of receiving.

    LOVED hearing your story! And also that he (the actor) was from Philadelphia (which is where I live).

    " When we left I gave him the price of a second cup and he really seemed embarassed but I explained that it would be kind of him to accept it from me. Now why can I see that from my side and still struggle to see that when I'm the receiver?"

    I sooooooooooooo hear you on that because I'm the same way, and react in same manner whenever I give someone something and they're embarrassed to take it.

    Isn't that silly?

    Thanks so much for stopping by and sharing on this post, dear lady. You've added MUCH!!!!!!

    Have a super week........X

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  52. hi ron,,
    well... i left a comment here but it's not here... hmmmm...oh well, i loved this post because it's so true of us being human and all that bs about selfishness and shouldn't be greedy or want too much. OH NO!! NOT THAT!

    love what you say here:
    If someone is always giving and not receiving, then the balance becomes imbalanced.

    so true my dear... you are so wise! xoxox

    well i am off to read about my favorite movie...she is so cute..too bad she had that awful face work done...poor thing, it must be so hard to live in that culture and try and make a living when everyone just has to get older...i think age brings wisdom, the highest form of beauty.

    ok, now that i've commented i'll go read it!

    ReplyDelete
  53. Greetings Linda~

    No, I never received your other comment. I even checked my spam box and it wasn't in there. I wonder what happened to it!?!?

    Anyway, so glad you enjoyed this post.

    "it's so true of us being human and all that bs about selfishness and shouldn't be greedy or want too much. OH NO!! NOT THAT!"

    EXACTLY!

    "...she is so cute..too bad she had that awful face work done...poor thing, it must be so hard to live in that culture and try and make a living when everyone just has to get older...i think age brings wisdom, the highest form of beauty."

    I totally agree! Age brings wisdom, the highest form of beauty!

    Thank you for stopping by and recommenting, dear friend. You're a sweetheart!

    Enjoy the rest of your week!

    xoxooxoxox

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  54. i totally love giving and too have a hard time receiving but at the same time, i don't appreciate an imbalance in any relationship. weird. i will give and give and while i may not expect something tangible in return, i do expect the person to at least give me their time or attention.

    "If someone is always giving and not receiving, then the balance becomes imbalanced." *like*

    ReplyDelete
  55. Hey ladyV~

    "i will give and give and while i may not expect something tangible in return, i do expect the person to at least give me their time or attention. "

    A-MEN! For me, giving and receiving does not have to be monetary, but rather time or attention.

    Thanks so much for stopping by and reading my previous posts, girl.

    You're a total sweetheart!

    (((( You ))))

    X

    ReplyDelete

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