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I owe my inspiration for this post to my longtime blogging buddy, Mark at Mark My Words.

Thanks, Mark!

Mark shared a faaaaabulous post earlier this week about how his recent health-conscious lifestyle change has caused him to feel good about himself; not only physically, but mentally as well. Now when he looks in the mirror, he sees someone different than he did months ago.

He sees:

“Confidence. Commitment. Strength. Vitality.”

Mark also mentioned something in his post about not wanting to come off boastful or vain in his recent accomplishments; trying not to make a big deal out of it. But the truth is, he’s genuinely proud of his hard work and determination, and likes the visual evidence of his transformation.

And by the way, I'm happy and proud for him because he did a complete turn around with his health. And it wasn't easy to make the commitment. So, bravo to you, Mark!

Anyway. This got me thinking about how many of us are hesitant to pat ourselves on the back and state honestly that we are proud of our accomplishments because that means we’re egotistical.

And yet, I think it’s odd how we have no hesitation in stating the things we don’t like about ourselves and seeing them as our weaknesses because that means we’re being truthful about ourselves.

But why is it okay to view our weaknesses as truth, and not okay to see our strengths and accomplishments as also being truth?

And I sincerely don't feel that's being egotistical at all. Because there is a huge difference between being egotistical and feeling that I have no room to grow, and simply feeling proud of myself for working hard in achieving something that was a challenge.

It’s called self-celebrating.

So, the whole point of this post is to say, don’t ever be hesitant to pat yourself on the back and share your successes with others.

Because you are not being vain or egotistical.

You’re just being truthful. And allowing others to be truthful as well.

Celebrating ourselves...


Have a celebratory weekend everyone!
X


43 comments:

  1. Great post, Ron. It's only in later years that I got round to congratulating myself on a few things. That's because I was raised by my mother never, ever to praise myself over anything. Even now I sometimes feel guilty if I do. I have also learned to accept praise from others which was another thing I was told was wrong. I now know that we don't have to shout it from rooftops but there is nothing wrong in thinking more highly about ourselves. I recognise it as an encouragement - and why not. Remember the old adage 'self praise is no recommendation'? It may not be but it helps get things in perspective as well as giving us the 'feel good' factor.


    Happy Friday, good gracious - the end of another week!

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  2. True friends and others that love you WANT to hear about your accomplishments. I've always had a hard time teaching my kids that there's a difference between that and bragging. They never wanted to tell people (even grandparents!) about what they had good reason to be proud of because they can't stand people who 'brag.'

    Maybe it's a fine line? Interesting topic, Ron! I'm so happy for Mark! Have a great weekend!

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  3. Ron, this is such a fantastic post! I can't thank you enough. All my life I've struggled with these dread of appearing to be egotistical if I am rightfully proud of myself.


    And that's a large part of the problem--we're afraid other people will think poorly of us. So we're acting out of fear of other people's opinions when we should be busy celebrating ourselves. Yet, as you brilliantly point out, we're first in line to tear ourselves down.


    Being proud of yourself is an important part of feeling worthy. That doesn't mean you rest on your laurels or hurt other people just to elevate yourself. But if you sincerely do a good job, whatever your job may be, then, damn it, stop whatever you're doing and give yourself a thumbs up. You really are worthy.


    Thanks again, buddy, this post is just what I needed. Have a terrific weekend!

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  4. " I have also learned to accept praise from others which was another thing I was told was wrong. I now know that we don't have to shout it from rooftops but there is nothing wrong in thinking more highly about ourselves. I recognise it as an encouragement - and why not."

    Yes! That's another great point you brought up about this topic - accepting praise from others. You're right, we don't have to shout it from the rooftops but there is nothing wrong in thinking (or believing) more highly of ourselves.

    " Remember the old adage 'self praise is no recommendation'? It may not be but it helps get things in perspective as well as giving us the 'feel good' factor."

    I LOVE how you said that! And I agree!

    Thanks so much for stopping by, dear lady. And yes, can you believe the end of another week? I feel like it was just last Friday - HA! Have a super weekend!

    X to you and Joe!

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  5. "True friends and others that love you WANT to hear about your accomplishments."

    Yes, that is so true! I love hearing about and celebrating the accomplishments of others. And that's also how I feel about the people I work with who are on my staff. Whenever I notice something that I feel they did well, I will always let them know by praising them. Because it acknowledges their accomplishments, allowing them to feel good about themselves.

    "I've always had a hard time teaching my kids that there's a difference between that and bragging. They never wanted to tell people (even grandparents!) about what they had good reason to be proud of because they can't stand people who 'brag.'"



    I agree, and that's a great point! There is fine line between 'bragging' and feeling good about themselves.


    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a faaaaabuous weekend!
    X

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  6. Ron, I loved this post because I just recently had a discussion with one of my close girlfriends who is applying for a new job and told her that it's so important to go into her interview with the attitude that she has a lot to offer the company because of her talents, accomplishments and background. I think there is a difference in feeling cocky about ourselves and being self-assured. If we don't truly believe in ourselves and state honestly our strong suits and successes, it's like denying ourselves the right to success.


    Great post, and thank you for sharing it! I'm going to email it to my friend so that she can read your words.


    Have a wonderful weekend, Ron x

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  7. Good points, Ron. I think parents caution their kids NOT to brag about their accomplishments, and we take those warnings into adulthood. Then, when we need to acknowledge our achievements (like during job interviews), we can't do it. We feel that "tooting our own horn" is somehow wrong.

    I suppose it's like everything else -- moderation is key. If ALL a person does is brag, then nobody wants to be around him. But true friends want to celebrate accomplishments with you and will be glad to share your good fortune.

    What beautiful photos you've capture here today! Have yourself a spectacular weekend, my dear!!

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  8. "Because you are not being vain or egotistical. You’re just being truthful. And allowing others to be truthful as well. Celebrating ourselves..." Ron, I couldn't agree with you more because when we give ourselves the right to celebrate, we give others that same right.


    I raised my son to feel proud of his successes and accomplishments without going overboard and bragging. I wanted him to realize that there is nothing negative about believing in himself because it gives him the incentive and courage to accomplish future challenges.


    Wonderful post, Ron! Beautiful photographs! I'm assuming you took them?

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  9. Bravo, great post! I guess we were taught it wasn't a good thing to "toot one's own horn". Perhaps the idea is to be confident not egotistical. Still it's difficult for some of us to have that confidence because we feel it's being boastful.

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  10. Hey there Rob!

    "All my life I've struggled with these dread of appearing to be egotistical if I am rightfully proud of myself. And that's a large part of the problem--we're afraid other people will think poorly of us. So we're acting out of fear of other people's opinions when we should be busy celebrating ourselves. "

    Yes, and think it may be because of the generation that you and I grew up in, where we were taught not to boast because we don't want to ever get a swelled head. But I think there is a difference in boasting and not being afraid to share our successes and believing in ourselves. And I think when we do that, we allow others to do the same thing.

    Like you said, "Being proud of yourself is an important part of feeling worthy."



    Amen!


    Thanks so much for stopping by, buddy. Have a terrific weekend!
    X

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  11. Hola Denise!

    "and told her that it's so important to go into her interview with the attitude that she has a lot to offer the company because of her talents, accomplishments and background."

    Yes! And GREAT advice!

    "If we don't truly believe in ourselves and state honestly our strong suits and successes, it's like denying ourselves the right to success."



    So beautifully stated!! And I sooooooooo agree! If we denying ourselves the right to success, then we block ourselves from it.


    Thanks so much for stopping by, girl. And please tell your girlfriend that I wish the best in her interview!


    Have a wonderful weekend!
    X

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  12. " I think parents caution their kids NOT to brag about their accomplishments, and we take those warnings into adulthood. Then, when we need to acknowledge our achievements (like during job interviews), we can't do it. We feel that "tooting our own horn" is somehow wrong."

    Exactly, Debbie! And you made an excellent point - we need to acknowledge our achievements without feeling that tooting our horn is somehow wrong.

    "I suppose it's like everything else -- moderation is key. If ALL a person does is brag, then nobody wants to be around him. But true friends want to celebrate accomplishments with you and will be glad to share your good fortune."



    Yes, moderation is the key. As I shared, I think there is a difference in being egotistical and feeling as though I have no room to grow, and celebrating my accomplishments and talents. And you're right, true friends WANT to celebrate with you.


    I took those photographs of the cherry blossoms last week when the trees first started to blossom. I LOVE cherry blossom trees! They remind me of Japan.


    Have a beautiful weekend, my friend, and thanks for stopping by!
    X

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  13. "I raised my son to feel proud of his successes and accomplishments without going overboard and bragging. I wanted him to realize that there is nothing negative about believing in himself because it gives him the incentive and courage to accomplish future challenges."


    Elaine, I LOVE that! And you raised your son with excellent advice! Being proud of his successes gives him the ability to know that he can accomplish future challenges.


    Thank you, and yes, I did take these photographs. I took them sometime last week when the cherry blossom trees just started to bloom. I have more photos of the pinks AND the whites. My favorite thing about cherry blossoms is when their petals fall from the tree; looking like confetti!


    Have a beautiful weekend, my friend, and thanks for stopping by!
    X

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  14. "But why is it okay to view our weaknesses as truth, and not okay to see our strengths and accomplishments as also being truth?" That's a great point, Ron! And I suppose it's because we're taught that acknowledging our weakness makes us strive to overcome them. But the truth is that when we focus on our "strengths", we overcome them. We are what we focus on.


    I think it's funny how we live in such a me, me, me, selfie, selfie, selfie society, but when it comes to REALLY believing in ourselves, we get insecure.


    Great post, dude!

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  15. "I guess we were taught it wasn't a good thing to "toot one's own horn". Perhaps the idea is to be confident not egotistical."


    Yes, Suzi, and you used the perfect word that I should have included in this post, but didn't...."confidence." And I think it's possible to feel confident without it coming off as "boastful." But you're right, I think it's because we were taught that it wasn't a good thing to toot one's own horn.


    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a fantastic weekend!
    X

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  16. Hey there Matt!

    "And I suppose it's because we're taught that acknowledging our weakness makes us strive to overcome them. But the truth is that when we focus on our "strengths", we overcome them. We are what we focus on."

    OMG...I freakin' LOVE how you said that because it's so true! "We are what we focus on."

    "I think it's funny how we live in such a me, me, me, selfie, selfie, selfie society, but when it comes to REALLY believing in ourselves, we get insecure."



    Brilliant observation, man!!!!!


    Thanks so much for stopping by, buddy. Have a most excellent weekend!
    X

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  17. Thank you so much, Ron! For the shout-out and the link. It's much appreciated. I mentioned not wanting to come across as vain or egotistical because earlier in the week I had posted something on FB mentioning the positive changes in my life, and a friend commented, "Quit bragging." That caused me to remove the post, which was probably an overreaction, because I know she was just trying to be funny. But it did make me think about the way people come across when they talk about positive accomplishments. It's a fine line between boastfulness and genuinely just sharing information.


    "It's called self-celebrating."


    Bravo! Nothing wrong with that. Your post is the perfect response to those people who might view it as bragging. Thank you so much! Have a great weekend, my friend.

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  18. As children we're born naturally joyful, and then life starts putting limits on how much joy it's acceptable to express and we spend a lifetime trying to find that joy again. Good for your friend. I'm reminded of the David Crosby lyric, "Gonna let my freak flag fly!" Expressing pride in ourselves gives others permission to do the same.

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  19. Ron, I read your post this morning but didn't have time to comment. Fabuloso post! And kudos to your friend, Mark! Everything you said here is so true. There is nothing unhealthy about genuinely acknowledging our strengths and sharing our successes with others. Allowing ourselves this right enables others to do the same. We all should live being proud of ourselves. And being proud of others. And celebrate!


    Have a great weekend, Ron!

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  20. Mark, you are so welcome :) And thank YOU, because after reading your faaaabulous post, it gave me food for thought for this post.

    " But it did make me think about the way people come across when they talk about positive accomplishments. It's a fine line between boastfulness and genuinely just sharing information."



    Yes, I agree. However, I have never felt that you've ever come across that way. You're someone who is not only happy about your own successes, but also for the successes of others. I have found that people who are boastful, usually have a hard time celebrating the successes of others.


    Thanks so much for stopping by, buddy. Have a TERRIFIC weekend!


    X to you and Tara

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  21. Jayne, I freaking LOVE what you shared...

    "As children we're born naturally joyful, and then life starts putting limits on how much joy it's acceptable to express and we spend a lifetime trying to find that joy again."

    OMG...that is soooooo TRUE! And that's why I think it's so important to hold onto a bit of child-likeness within our adulthood.

    "Expressing pride in ourselves gives others permission to do the same."



    Amen and thank you!


    Have a faaaaaabulous weekend, my friend. And thanks for stopping by!
    X

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  22. Hey ho Robert!

    " There is nothing unhealthy about genuinely acknowledging our strengths and sharing our successes with others. Allowing ourselves this right enables others to do the same. We all should live being proud of ourselves. And being proud of others. And celebrate!"



    Thank you, and I couldn't agree with you more! It's funny how we're taught that being proud is a negative thing, but really, not being proud is negative.


    Much thanks for stopping by, buddy. Have a fabuloso weekend!


    X

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  23. I find it quite hard to celebrate myself. I can't even take a compliment lol.


    Kind of like how it's funny that we can replay one negative comment in our heads for days - yet when we hear something good it's gone faster than Bud Light at a Nickelback concert.


    I totally get it. And we need to be more loving of ourselves! I'm feeling extra mushy after the Bruce Jenner interview, what can I say.

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  24. First, thanks for the link to that blog - really enjoyed Marls' post.



    And you know, I have a hard time with saying that I'm proud of myself about something even when I secretly am. But I think you're right that it's good to celebrate achievements. And there are ways to do it that are simply an acknowledgement rather than bragging.

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  25. Ron, I sent this post to my friend and she loved it. She also said that she loves your blog and will start reading it. x

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  26. Aw, Denise, thanks for stopping back to let me know she enjoyed it.


    Hope you're having a faaaabulous weekend, girl!
    X

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  27. Ron, I don't always comment on all of your posts because I don't always have the time, but I do read them. Wonderful post! Inspiring and true.

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  28. Hello there Suzanne!


    Thank you, glad you enjoyed :)


    Thanks so much for taking the time to stop by. Hope you had a super weekend!
    X

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  29. "But gosh... I am not a painter and have TWO oil paintings under my belt. If I step back and look at them squinting, they are GOOD! We are our worst cheerleaders... when we should be the TOP cheerleaders for ourselves!"

    Yes! Yes! Yes! Katherine, we should be the TOP cheerleaders for ourselves, you are ABSOLUTELY right! And I'm so glad to hear that you cheered yourself on and said, "they are GOOD!" And I've seen some of your artwork on your blog and they ARE good! You're a very talent lady in many ways - your art, your photography, and your writing!

    You GO, you!

    Hope you had a super weekend, my friend. Thanks a bunch for stopping by!
    X

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  30. "And a highlighter!!!!!!!"

    HA! Katherine, it's so funny you mentioned the highlighter because I was going to say something about that, but didn't.

    " Now be honest, did you dust or straighten up before you took the picture?"

    No, I swear to god, I didn't straighten up before I took the picture. And if you look real close, you can see a paper mess under the top part of my HP printer/scanner.

    " A deer leg. Yes, a DEER LEG. And things I could not even identify."

    OMG, how funny! A DEER LEG!

    "I totally respect how you can live with such a tiny freezer. I would be lost!"



    I have to shop a little at a time because the freezer doesn't hold much. I shop very much like a European, I buy just enough groceries to last about 5 days and then shop again. Having a small fridge and apartment has taught me how to live effeciently because I don't have much space.


    X

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  31. http://ladyfi.wordpress.comMonday, April 27, 2015

    You're so right! We should celebrate ourselves and others more often!

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  32. "We should celebrate ourselves and others more often!"

    Amen, Fiona! And I think when we give ourselves permission to do so, we give others permission as well. To CELEBRATE :)

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a grrrreat week!
    X

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  33. What a wonderful post! I believe many people struggle with this very mindset....especially women. Men, typically, are used to taking credit and kudos for accomplishments. Women, not so much and I don't really know why? Women tend to focus more on their children's or husband's accomplishments. A few years ago I made a conscious effort to lose about 25 pounds to help with my mental and physical health. A HUGE accomplishment. But aside from people who did notice and comment, I really didn't advertise the fact. Great job. It really made me think.

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  34. Well, I don't see any board books, balls, baby dolls, musical toys, pacifiers and sippy cups on the floor.....so It looks better than MY office! Someday the room will grow up to be a "real" office......when I'm old and gray and in no need of one anymore! Thanks for sharing. (I won't even comment about the frig) ;-)

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  35. "especially women. Men, typically, are used to taking credit and kudos for accomplishments. Women, not so much and I don't really know why? Women tend to focus more on their children's or husband's accomplishments."

    Lisa, I loved what you shared here and I have to agree with every word you said. And yet, I think that's so unfair because to me, women (females) are very powerful human beings who are responsible for so man great things in this world and have the right to feel proud of those accomplishments.

    " A few years ago I made a conscious effort to lose about 25 pounds to help with my mental and physical health. A HUGE accomplishment."



    BRAVA to you!


    *three cheers*


    And you should be very proud of that!


    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a great rest of your week!
    X

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  36. "Well, I don't see any board books, balls, baby dolls, musical toys, pacifiers and sippy cups on the floor.....so It looks better than MY office! Someday the room will grow up to be a "real" office......when I'm old and gray and in no need of one anymore!"

    HAHAHAHAHA! OMG, that is so funny, Lisa! But that's only because you have your preciously adorable grandchildren in your home, so I'm sure that makes up for the sippy cups on the floor :)



    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend!

    X

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  37. Dear Ron,
    In the spirit of your post:
    I'm brilliant in every possible way.

    Yours smugly,
    dalecooper57.

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  38. "I'm brilliant in every possible way."

    *applause*

    You GO, Dale! And you are not being smug, you're simply celebrating yourself and not apprehensive about stating it.

    We should all believe that we are brilliant!

    Thanks so much for stopping by, buddy. Have a faaaaaaabulous week!

    X

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  39. What a lovely, uplifting post Ron! And SO true, we need to pat ourselves on the back, celebrate our accomplishments along the way, savor the moments...I couldn't agree more. This is such a good reminder for me. I tend to be in high speed most of the time and often don't find the time to relish the feeling of finishing my latest book, project etc...I'll have to keep this in mind more, thank you!!!


    And these photos, talk about accomplished, you rock with that camera!!!


    Have a super weekend, G :-)

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  40. Hello there Geraldine!

    "we need to pat ourselves on the back, celebrate our accomplishments along the way, savor the moments...I couldn't agree more. This is such a good reminder for me. I tend to be in high speed most of the time and often don't find the time to relish the feeling of finishing my latest book, project etc..."

    That's an EXCELLENT point your brought up - savoring our successes in the moment! You're absolutely right!

    Thanks so much for stopping by, my friend. Have a super weekend!
    X

    P.S. and thank you, I am so enjoying this camera and learning lots of new stuff.

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  41. I have the messy drawers too! I don't think there is anything wrong with your computer desk. We're downsizing & will have to look for something similar in the near future.

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  42. You're right Ron, more often I am apt to point out my faults rather than my strengths. For instance, I am a "Baby Whisperer." I can calm any baby anytime. Even before they can smile, babies seek me out with their eyes & do not look away. I am also a great friend, can keep a confidence plus I'm kind & caring. I'm very good at promoting products even though I hate working in sales. Years have stolen some of my looks, but I'm still a good looking woman who is young at heart even though my body is betraying me. I am an excellent listener & can often zero in on something to help a friend when they don't realize what the underlying problem might be.
    I'm proud of my accomplishments as a parent. Even though I only had 1 biological child, I had a hand in raising a number of teenagers who have turned into kind, productive members of society despite the odds being against them in some cases.

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  43. BRAVA, Benze! Thank you for sharing your accomplishments and celebration of yourself!

    *applause*

    " For instance, I am a "Baby Whisperer." I can calm any baby anytime. Even before they can smile, babies seek me out with their eyes & do not look away."

    OMG, it's so funny you mentioned that because I'm a "Baby Magnet" myself. Babies will always seek me out in a crowd and smile at me. And I think it's because they know that I ADORE babies!

    "I am also a great friend, can keep a confidence plus I'm kind & caring."



    Yes you are! And I can tell that just from knowing you through blogging. You are a very loyal and caring friend!


    Thanks so much for stopping by and catching up on my posts. You're a sweetheart!


    (((((((((((((( You ))))))))))))))


    X

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