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I realize that occasionally we all need to take our finger and either scratch the inside of our nose; dislodge some nasal trash; or adjust a misplaced nose hair from tickling us.

But today, while I was in Borders sitting on the floor reading a book, my eyes suddenly caught the delicious sight of a gentleman seated directly across from me, picking his nose.

It started as a subtle pick, but then gradually moved into an entire production number.

I watched, as his index finger moved deeper and deeper into his nose canal, until it completely disappeared past the first knuckle.

Then he started moving his finger in wide circles, as if he was trying to stretch out his nostril, so he could get that digit even deeper.

With my horrified eyes, peering across the tops of my reading glasses, I’m watching this continue for like a full two minutes.

And for the entire duration of this nose-picking event …his eyes never left the page of the book that he was reading.

(talk about some great multi-tasking)

Anyway…deeper and deeper his finger continued to dredged for oil, until I wanted to let out a SCREAM…

“HOLY SHIT MAN…WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TRYING TO DO…REACH YOUR PITUITARY GLAND!?!?!?”

Jeeees!

Ok…an occasional discrete nose-picking, I can totally understand…

But if you have a BOOGIE that’s THAT deep…I think you’re in dire need of some liquid DRAINO.

Or some sort of MEDICAL procedure.

And for heavens sake…please stop FINGERING yourself in public…it’s VERY unattractive!


36 comments:

  1. That's the coolest, goofiest gargolye-looking stone creature face I've ever seen! Love it! I want one for my garden...ok, no garden, I kill everything, but for my backyard.

    I admit, I'll pick occasionally, but ONLY IN PRIVATE!!

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  2. Eeew!
    So maybe he was just so into whatever he was reading that he totally didn't realize he was in public. OR he was just plain RUDE. Like go to the bathroom or get a tissue or something?? LOL
    Eeew!
    Gosh, now I'm wondering what I do while really engaged in a book at my fav haunt. Have I ever done some nose mining??? Oh.the.horror!

    I had an uncle who used to do a little picking and place the boogie on the wall next to his chair. Little dried pieces of snot for his family to enjoy. How lovely.

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  3. I would never pick my nose in public!
    In private yes! ;)

    Have you noticed how many people sitting in traffic pick their nose?

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  4. I must confess.....I couldn't get past the fact that you were on the floor reading a book in Borders.

    *shaking head*

    Reading a book.
    On the floor.... at Borders.

    *shaking head*

    Have I ever mentioned this thing I have for new books vs. used books?
    Really, it has nothing to do with knowing if I were on the floor it very well might take a crane to get me back up....LOL

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  5. Hi Ron,
    I syopped by earlier ( before lunch !), saw the title & said " I'll come back after I finish lunch !)
    That is sooo gross !
    OK; everyone "has to at one moment or the other but please,please; use a kleenix or go to the restroom.
    You have my complete sympathy after viewing this .

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  6. OK, so the first thing that comes to mind is, "why did you keep looking?" I'm guessing it was like a train wreck, you knew it was grotesque and wrong to stare, but you couldn't pull your eyes away either.

    Whenever I see someone do that I tell whomever is with me, "Look, that guy is trying to tickle his brain!"

    And speaking of "that guy", it is always a guy that does the mining isn't it? I don't think I've ever seen a woman do that.

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  7. I love busting people picking their noses while driving in a car. I try to catch their eye and laugh at them.

    Mean, I know, but funny.

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  8. Morning Rhea~

    I know...when I saw the gargoley image over at Flickr, I cracked up! Doesn't he have the cutiest damn face?

    Unfortunately....I KILL everything too!

    I can't even grow Silk Flowers!?

    Thanks for stopping by, Rhea!

    See, you're so considerate...you're "private nose-picker."

    Me too!

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  9. Morning Crystal Chick~

    OMG...you are too damn funny about your UNCLE and his boogies!!!

    Because believe it or not, when I was in catholic school, the kid that sat next to me (John something or other) use to pick his nose and then place them UNDER HIS DESK!!!

    It was horrible!

    And one time, the Sister caught him and made him CLEAN the entire desk!!!

    So John was BOOGIE-LESS!

    How sad!

    Thanks for stopping by and sharing that story, M!

    LOVED IT!

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  10. Morning Akelamalu~

    OMG!!!!!!

    YOU ARE SOOOOO RIGHT!!!

    I no longer drive much, because I live in a city, but when I did....DAMN...I noticed that the nose pickers went WILD at the red lights! I think it was because they knew they had a full 30 seconds of hand's free PICKING available to them!

    HA!

    Don't you love boogie-talk?

    Thanks so much for stopping by, dear lady!

    And thanks for reminding me about the red-light-pickers!

    Have a great day!

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  11. Ohhh YUCK!!!
    Jeff is right, a woman would never do such a thing!!!
    I have proof of that, none of my girls pick their noses, fart, burp, or anything like that. (not in front of other people anyways)
    My boys (husband included) think that all things related to gross bodily fuctions is cause for utter hilarity.
    Have a good week Ron.

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  12. OMG MEL!!!

    You're comment made me totally CRACK UP!

    You have such a wonderful way of expressing your awesome sense of humor, through the way you lay the words out on the page.

    VERY FUNNY!

    I have this "thing" about sitting on the floor. Even when I'm at home...if I'm watching a movie, or talking to someone on the phone...I prefer sitting or laying on the floor. Beside sitting at this computer, I very rarely sit in a chair.

    Sometimes I think I must have been a "Sitting Buddha" in one of my pastlives!?!

    I just love to sit on the floor, cross-legged.

    Thanks for stopping by, Mel!

    You always bring such FUN here!

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  13. Morning Barbara~

    Sorry about the Pre-lunch Boogie Post!?

    Gag me with a spoon, right?

    I totally agree...USE A KLEEENEX...or a Q-TIP!

    And turn your head to side, people!

    Thanks for stopping by this morning, Barbara!

    Always great seeing ya!

    And hope you had an enjoyable lunch!?!?

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  14. Hey Ho Jeff~

    I know...it is kind of STRANGE that I continued to sit there and STARE, isn't it?

    I think I'll write this off as doing a "character study."

    HA!

    Or maybe...I'm the BOOGIE MAN!

    But, it's as you said...I think it was like looking at a train wreck. I was enthralled at the freakishness of it!

    And yes...I too have only seen "guys" blatantly "freeing their boogies."

    Aren't we disgusting creatures?

    Thanks for stopping by, buddy!!

    Hope you're having a Boogie-Free Day!

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  15. Greetings Mama Dawg~

    Welcome....it's so nice to see ya!

    Hey listen, you're like the second person here, who mentioned "nose-picking at traffic lights." I totally forgot about that, because I no longer own a car. But I DO remember that happening quite a lot!

    And then when they catch you, catching THEM...they get all red and embarrassed.

    (but they still keep their finger in their nose)

    Thanks for dropping by this morning, Mama Dawg!

    Enjoy your day.

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  16. Morning Nicole~

    I know, I totally agree with you...Women are from Venus...and Men are from Mars!

    But then there are some of us (like Jeff and I) who are the "rare ones".

    Because we have the perfect blend of Yin and Yang.

    We're MACHO...yet SENSITIVE.

    And we only fart....odorless Pixie Dusty!

    Right, Jeff?

    Thanks for stopping by, Nicole!!

    Have a WONDERFUL time on your vacation!!

    Hurry back!!!!

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  17. I believe he may have been trying to stimulate his hair follicles from INSIDE his head. Guess Rogaine didn't work for him huh?!

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  18. Bravo Anndi!!!!

    I think you hit the nail on the head!!!

    THAT'S IT!!!!

    See...leave to another Libra, to come up with a perfectly logical and intelligent reason!

    We're psychic!

    Hey....it's great talking to you again! You and I both took last week away from blogging. I hope you had a wonderful time with your family.

    I'll stop by your blog later this evening to say hi!

    Thanks for stopping by, Anndi!

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  19. I guess whatever he was searching for must have been pushed deep inside his throat cas of his intense fingering.
    Ron, hope you didn't sit there staring at the aftermath of this nose excavation, cos that would really be a horrible sight indeed :)

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  20. Hi Ron,

    Just found you from Barbara's blog (Home in France). I have to say that the French are pros when it comes to nose picking-- EVERYWHERE... NOT in any way discreet and especially RIGHT in front of me!!! I want to scream each time at them---EWWW, that's sooooo gross, don't pick your nose in public!!! I end up saying it out loud, and in English... So, I don't really know how effective it is.. but I DO give them a really mean stare..... In fact, one guy picked his nose on the metro the other day, with three people on all sides of him.... and I honestly don't know where he flicked it, but he kept looking at his finger when he took it out of his nose, time after time... He must've been "diggin' fer gold!!!" Take care, Leesa

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  21. How does it go...You can pick your friends. You can pick your nose...but you can't pick your friend's nose. hehehe.

    I once heard that the nose was amazing...funny however big your fingers are...they always fit in your nose. Don't try that at home without the assistance of a professional nose picker.

    So I guess you noticed how people go into a trance when they pick their nose.

    I was driving in car and this guy in a BMW was next to me picking his nose...how intriguing. I glanced every so often...Whoa! he finally picked a winner. I thought...now what are you going to do with that boogie that's at the tip of your finger. He looked at it in wonder. Was he amazed, proud, ashamed?

    I couldn't take it...I stepped on the petal...let me out of that's guys bubble...I have since wondered...did he put it on his sun visor, his seat...or did he eat it. EEEEWWWWWW! I don't want to know.

    :D
    Ciao babes.

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  22. Hi Amit~

    Oh, that's funny!

    I liked that word you used...excavation.

    Because that's what it really looked like!

    No, thank god...because actually, he was interrupted by two friends, and then left, before the DEED was done !!!!

    They must have been his "Boogie Buddies!"

    Thanks for stopping by, Amit!

    Always nice seeing ya!

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  23. Welcome Leesa!

    Thanks so much for stopping by and taking the time to comment!

    Barbara and I have just recently met, but the minute we started chatting, it was like we ALWAYS knew one another. She's a really nice lady, isn't she?

    And from your comment, I can tell that you've got an AWESOME sense of humor, which is ALWAYS very welcomed and appreciated here!

    THAT WAS TOO FUNNY!...it made me LAUGH my ass off!!!

    Yea, that's the thing...where do these people who pick their nose in public PUT the damn boogies?

    (I don't think I want to know)

    Thanks again for stopping by and introducing yourself, it's really nice meeting new, cool people!

    Stop by anytime, the door is always open!

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  24. Good Evening Miss Jones~

    HOW CUTE...I totally forgot about that saying, but I do remember hearing it!

    And you're SO RIGHT, because this guy WAS caught in a TRANCE. But it was like a split-trance, because he was able to pick AND read at the same time. It was as if he was in a deep meditation!!!

    HA!

    Hey, the story about the guy in the BMW killed me!! Can you imagine how disrespectful that must be, to place a boogie in a BMW?

    I guess this puts a whole new meaning on BMW...

    B-oogie M-onster W-ithin!

    HA!

    Thanks for dropping by, and always sharing your freaking wonderful WIT, Spiky!

    MUCH enjoyed!!!

    ciao bella

    P.S. I bet he put the boogie in his COACH briefcase!

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  25. It just goes to show that people have become so self-absorbed lately that they think they are invisible. That or they just don't give a fuck that others around them think they are totally gross.

    This leads me to something that men tend to do frequently - adjust their junk constantly whilst talking to you. For Pete's sake guys! It's not going anywhere, it's attached. Please get it settled into a comfy position BEFORE you start the conversation!

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  26. Hey Ron,

    Got your comment on my blog, Thanks!! You "picked" the right one--- in fact, you "picked a winner" but not the booger kind- WHEW!! I have to be careful now how I sit on the metro because if lean to much to the corner in the seat closest to the window, I'm really afraid to get dried boogies on me!!! I don't know where people "flick 'em" but I am going to make a real point to let these people know when I catch them digging, that it's NOT cool to do in public!! GROSS!! Thanks again for the post.. It's soooo true everywhere.. Nosepickers International, I guess!! I think I'll do a post on it and link to your blog!!-- Take care, Leesa

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  27. OMG Nitebyrd!!!!

    Can I JUST TELL YOU....

    YOU SAID IT!

    That's ANOTHER THING that I constantly see too!

    The "equipment adjustment thing." I'm a GUY, and I honestly don't understand this. It's almost as if their just "checking" to see that it's STILL there!?!? I often wonder if these guys wear underwear, because for me, once it's "tucked in" for the day....it's in "place."

    Oh well, I guess we're all different?!?!

    Thanks for stopping by, Miss Nitebyrd.

    You always give me something GREAT to laugh about!

    Thanks!

    Enjoy your day!

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  28. Hello again Leesa!

    GREAT!

    So glad you got my comment. Thanks for letting me know.

    Hey, you've got some really interesting blogs. I want to get back to them and check them out even further.

    And PLEASE let me know when you post on "nose-picking" I would LOVE to read it!!

    Thanks for stopping by again, Leesa!

    Nice talking to ya!

    Have a great day.

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  29. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA God I've missed you!!!!

    HELLO RONNIE!!! :-D

    FINALLY I HAVE THE NET AGAIN!!! WOOOOO!

    I was hoping to catch up on all your post's today, but I'm running short for time as I have truckloads to catch up on including near 600 emails that have accumulated in my inbox!!!

    So It's gonna take me some serious time!!! *Sheesh*

    Oh isn't nose picking just hideous?!!!

    I have finally only JUST trained Hubby out of picking his nose and eating it!!!!! ERGHK!!!

    He went from doing it publicly oblivious to the public screwing up their faces at him...

    to doing it only at home in front of me...

    to doing it discreetly when he thought I wasn't looking!

    But I developed eyes in the back of my head, and I was so disgusted with his habit that I grew in tune with the whole process of it and even learnt to know what it sounded like!

    I would be in another room when I would clue on to the awkward silence of him in the lounge and just KNEW that he had his finger up his nose - digging for a treat!

    "GET YOUR FINGER OUT OF IT!!!" I would yell!

    "HOW THE HELL DID YOU KNOW???" He would always yell back to me! *GiGGLeS*

    Finally he has got the hint and has stopped completely!

    Well... I can only hope he doesn't drive down the street to get away from me just to do it! LOL

    *Cringes*

    GREAT POST RONNIE!!! I'VE MISSED YOUUUUU! xx

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  30. Hellllooooooo Giggles!

    OMG, girl...it's SO FREAKING GREAT to see you back online again!!!

    And I've MISSED YOU TOO!

    I read your last Rat Girl post and LOVED it!

    God...I'm so glad you're BACK!

    OMG...you mean to tell me that your husband EATS HIS BOOGIES??? HOLY COW...I just CAN'T imagine that?? I wonder what would possess someone to eat one?

    Maybe, because their FAT-FREE???

    eeewwwww! I'm GAGGING right now!

    Anyway...so glad to hear you've got him to stop doing it in public.

    Hey, listen...no worries, dear one....I know that you must be SWARMED with things to catch up on with everyone's blogs, so please don't worry about reading all my posts. I'm just so happy you stopped by to let me know you're back online.

    THANK YOU!!!

    It's GREAT seeing ya, Giggle! xo

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  31. *GiGGLeS* I know right? I couldn't imagine what Boogers taste like!!! It can't be good surely!!!

    Oh Ronnie, I am not wanting to catch up on ALL of your posts just to be poilte!!! (Me polite? HA!!) No Ofcourse not! I am wanting to catch up on all your posts because I BLOODY LOVE THEM AND CAN'T GET ENOUGH!!!!!

    You!!! Should write a book of all your posts! SERIOUSLY! Your vents are such a pleasure and so fun to read and we can ALL relate to them! You'll make millions!!!

    Let me know when the books out! I want the first ever copy with your autograph! ;-) xx

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  32. Hello again Giggles!

    Maybe they taste a little like a "Kettle-Style Potato Chip!?!"

    TEEEHEEE!

    Thank you, my dear friend. That was SO sweet of you to say that. I'm so happy you enjoy coming here and reading. That makes me feel STUPENDOUS!!

    I feel so blessed to have so many NICE people who come here.

    And thank YOU for being one of them!

    Hey listen, I have an idea. If I DO write a book, I want YOU to make all the graphics ok? You're so freaking talented!

    Thanks for stopping by again, Giggle...it's so EXCITING to have you back!

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  33. Hi Ron,
    I hope you don't mind me trolling around on your blog. Eventually I'll troll around everyone's blogs LOL; I'm bored here at work.

    and I will never ever again sit on the floor of a Borders or Barnes and Noble ever again,
    so help me Dog.

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  34. Hi Debi!

    You are SO funny!!!

    Absolutely not...you can troll around this blog any old time you want! That's what it's here for!

    And GOD, how lucky you are to be able to use the Internet and BLOG at work. Gosh...I wish I could do that at my job!

    Yes...and be VERY careful about sitting on the floor at Borders...it's QUITE "Boogie Infested."

    And trust me...I KNOW this!

    Please stop by anytime you'd like. You're always welcomed here!

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  35. I was rally laughing my butt off while reading this entries of u. I do that sometimes and it is really unattractive especially if ur a girl. LOL!

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  36. Hi Edele!

    Welcome...and thank you for taking the time to leave a comment!

    It's alway so GREAT meeting new bloggers!!

    So glad you found a giggle in this post.

    Me too...I've been known to PICK a boogie or two!

    And I only PRAY that no one catches me!

    HA!

    BOOGIE DOWN!

    Please stop by, anytime...you're always welcomed!

    Happy Friday, Edele!

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