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This was actually a post that I first intended to write for my other blog, where I review and share some great finds that I’ve come across.

However after thinking about it, and realizing that it would also work as post for Vent, I decided to share it on both blogs.

(however the other post will be SLIGHTLY edited)

About four years ago, I had the wonderful experience of representing the cosmetic company, NARS.

NARS was created by the talented and gifted artist and photographer, Fran├žois Nars.

Before I started with the company, I had heard countless stories about one of the infamous blushes within the color collection called, Orgasm.

Orgasm is one of those blushes, that basically goes with every woman’s skin tone.

It’s a perfect combination of the peach and pink palettes, so that it adjusts to whoever is wearing it.

Even for women of color, it can be used as a wonderful highlight; giving the skin a soft and subtle glow.

Orgasm looks absolutely natural.

(just like an orgasm!)

It truly is one of the best and most adaptable blushes on the market.

Anyway…I remember my first experience dealing with the name ORGASM.

I had only been with the company a few weeks, when one day, during a massive lunch-hour shopping rush, a woman ran up to the counter totally out of breath and in a tizzy.

When I walked around to the front of the counter and asked if she needed any help, without even thinking, she suddenly blurted out…..

“Yes, PLEASE…I’m in a MAJOR hurry because I’m on my lunch break, so I need you to give an orgasm FAST!!

And without skipping a beat, I said to her, “Ok, ma'am…I’ll try and give you one as FAST as I possibly can.”

Suddenly…the two of us looked at one another and simultaneously burst into laughter.

She said, “Oh. My. God…I am so TOTALLY embarrassed…”

I continued laughing and said, “Oh please…no need to be embarrassed, it’s the best laugh I’ve had all week!”

“Oh, well…you DO know what I mean, don’t you?”

And I said, “Of course…Orgasm Blush. But right now it doesn’t look like you NEED any blush.”

So I quickly grabbed the product, rang it up and handed it to her saying, “I hope you were SATISFIED with my performance.”

She said, “Oh, yes…it was the BEST orgasm I’ve ever had!”

And as she walked away, I thought to myself, “What a wonderful job I have. To be able to give someone an ORGASM…whenever they ask for one….

*And you'll definitely want a cigarette after applying it.


  1. Hey Ron,
    That is just sooooo funny !
    I think that it was one of those times that you had to be there...
    But it made me laugh so much too :)
    Geez; these Americans are in a hurry for everything.
    I should know; I was rushing around too at one time in my life.

    But,oooh; think about the afterglow that you have created in all the people who have read this ;)

    Bonjour from hubby & myself ;)

  2. OMG what a riot!

    When I first started reading this I was wondering where it was going.....
    Yikes, will I have to reveal things????

    Honey, I will talk to just about anyone and about most anything but even I would have a hard time discussing orgasms. LOL
    Okay, well, there are a couple blogs I read......
    na, let's not go there.

    So WHEW, off the hook for anything personal and will just say that it's probably been a very popular blush!! hehe
    It's a HARD job to keep the masses satisfied but someone has to DO IT. Glad you were UP for the JOB. ;0

  3. Talk about the ultimate quicky!

    I must say, I saw that one cuming.

    If she was buying it for one of the girls to do dress-up, it would have been fore-play.

    Guess she didn't ask for any lip service from you.

    alright, I better stop now.

    Thanks for the laughs Ron.

  4. OMG!! That's a HILARIOUS story, Ron!!! I LOVE it!! Howwwwwww funny it must have seemed to you - first... and then to her--- when she realized what she had SAID--- and then to BOTH of you together... SIMULTANEOUSLY!! Soooo, it must have been great for both of you!!!! Did you smoke a ciggy afterwards? heheheheh!! Great!

  5. Bonjour Barbara!

    I think she and I were laughing FIRST, because of an embarrassing ooooops!

    But then, when we both realized how FUNNY the situation was...we both got into it, and made it even funnier!

    I swear to's situations like this, that always reminds me that "life" is SO MUCH MORE fascinating than fiction!!!!

    (especially when you live in a city!!!)

    I'll never forget that was priceless!!!!

    And who knew it would give me something to BLOG about?!?!?!?!?


    Thanks for stopping by this morning, Barbara!

    ALWAYS enjoyed!

    Happy Wednesday!

  6. Morning Crystal Chick!

    I LOVE your PLAY on words!!!

    That was GREAT!!!

    No, my friend...I would NEVER ask my readers to divulge PERSONAL infomation such as orgasms....

    ...only personal things such as: how much money do you make?; have you ever robbed a bank?; or have you had face lift?...but NEVER about an ORGASM!!!

    That's much too personal!


    Yes, M....this was one of those "Candid Camera Moments" in life, that was truly FUN!!!

    Thanks for dropping by today, M!

    Hey...and if you're ever in Cherry Hill Mall...check the blush out.

    And tell them...."Ron sent me!"

    Enjoy your Wednesday!

  7. HOLY SHIT Jeff!!!

    THAT WAS GREAT, MAN!!!!!! witty, witty man!!!

    The "Lip Service" was my FAV!!!!

    TOO FUNNY!!!!

    Thanks a BUNCH for adding your awesome humor to this post, buddy!

    Have a great Wednesday!!

    Later gator!

  8. Bonjour Leesa!

    She was SUCH a good sport about it, and it ended up being something that I'm SURE the two of us will tell people about for the rest of our lives!!!!

    (I know I have!) was SO FUNNY!

    Hey listen, if you get a chance, please visit the link I left on Francois. He's orginally from France. He's a very COOL guy!

    Thanks for dropping by today, Leesa!

    And Happy Wednesday!

  9. Yeah, when I first started reading this, I was thinking, "O.K., I was willing to share my story about my Cat Stevens Peace Train singing, but I don't know how far I'm willing to go writing about this subject."

    Thanks for not asking!

    And thanks for the fun story to start off my day!

  10. LOL I can just visualise it!

    You know there's a drink called an Orgasm - Vodka, Tia Maria and Baileys? This reminded me of one of MWM's birthday celebrations. A large group of our friends had gathered to help us celebrate in our local and we were talking about the drink (Orgasm). A few of the ladies said they'd like to try one so MWM piped up "When we get back to my house I'm going to give you all an orgasm" the silence was deafening! :0

  11. Oh I forgot to ask in the excitement of my comment, do NARS still make that product? It sounds just the thing I'm looking for.

  12. Good Morning Carol!! funny!

    I didn't realize how many readers would be thinking the SAME THING!!!

    Oh well...I guess I can always refer to this post as a "suspenseful-thriller."


    Thanks a bunch for stopping by, Carol!

    Hope you have a WONDERFUL day!

    Happy Wednesday!

  13. OMG...Akelamalu!!!!

    That story was HYSTERCAL!!

    You should have heard me LAUGHING!!

    And actually spit my coffee out!!!


    And yes...I have heard of that drink, however, I think I'm too chicken to try it...I hear it's WILD!!!

    (like the NAME)

    And yes...they still do make the blush. It's one of their staple blushes. I don't think they'll ever discontinue it.

    Try using the link I left on this post (the one that says NARS). There's a location finder on the website, so you'll be able to find a store in the UK that carries it!

    It truly is one of the BEST blushes out there!

    Thanks for stopping by, dear lady!

    And thanks SO MUCH for adding your wonderful story to this post!!

    It was GREAT!

    Happy Wednesday!

  14. OH.dear.god.....
    I have to go on an errand for hubby in a few minutes and all I keep thinking is I hope that I don't blurt out in the hardware store that 'Ron sent me in for an Orgasm'. Hubby Ron.... Friend Ron. This could get confusing. Especially when HUB gets the bill.
    Hardware Store:
    assorted supplies: $129.95
    orgasm: $25.00
    Hey, that's cheap for the big O.
    Whoops, wait a sec, at SEPHORA they are 25 bucks, who the heck knows what Handyman Harry will charge?

    my worlds are colliding....

    Hey, did you notice that not only does Sephora have your basic Orgasm, they have Deep Throat, Sin, and Super Orgasm too. And as an added bonus ....

    I'll pass on that first errand, I'm going to the MALL!! And forget the quicky Jeff is talking about...tell him there ARE meds to help with that... I'll be out ALL DAY! And I might stop over at Akelamalu's on the way home. ;0

    And to answer your questions:
    Not nearly enough.
    I plan to on the way to the Mall today. ;)
    No, there isn't anyone strong enough to lift it.
    Anything else you want to know????? LOL

    Happy day you naughty blogger. You better put up a XXX warning now!

  15. Helloooo again Crystal Chick!

    OMG...your comment had me rolling on the floor!!!

    That was so freaking GREAT!!!

    Yes...Nars comes up with my most UNUSUAL names for his products. He actually names a lot of his lipsticks after classical films, such as: Roman Holiday.

    As I'm sure you've noticed on the website, he has a WHOLE LINE of Orgasm products (lip gloss, eyeshadow, cream blush and an additional powder blush)

    Hey listen, I think you and I should fly over to the UK and visit Akelamlu and her hubby. We could ALL put on Orgasm blush and then do shots of the drink Orgasm!! to love ya, baby! to love ya, baby!

    (thank you Donna Summers)

    Thanks for stopping by again, M!

    Thoroughly enjoyed it!

    Let me know how it goes at the mall!

  16. hello ronnie: I'm feeling a tad sad and saw you posted. So here I am for relief and I see...the word orgasm. I ran as quickly as my heels would let me.

    *Pant pant*

    Gimme! I want a orgasm blush. And you can take your time. hehehe. Can I have that with a disheveled slutty, yet elegant look. :D

    You made me giggle.

    I'm sad Ronnie and my heart hurts...and you made me smile and laugh anyway. I thank you my precious friend.

    Have a wonderful rest of the day sweetie.

    Ciao my sweet friend.

  17. Hello Miss Jones!!

    I just home from work and checked my comments.

    OMG...I'm so sorry you're feeling sad today, but am SO GLAD I was able to make you GIGGLE!!!

    I'll tell ya, just get yourself some Orgasm Blush...and with a just single'll be giggling and smiling all day long!!


    I hope all is well for you and that you're ok. Are you still out of the state?

    Sending you "good energy" and "positive thoughts" my friend!!!

    Here it comes, ready?{{{{{{{{{Spiky}}}}}}}}}}}}

    You take care, OK?

    Ciao bella!

  18. You presented this so well.
    Kudos. :)

  19. Greetings Ubermouth!

    Welcome...thanks for stopping by and taking the time to leave a comment!

    Hey...this is SO funny, because I was JUST over at Spiky's blog, leaving her a comment...and saw YOUR comment!!!

    How cool!

    Nice meeting you!

    Thanks for enjoying this post.

    Stop by anytime...the door is always open!

    Enjoy your evening!

  20. <--laughing

    Gotta get me some of that....LOL

  21. Ron, you are too funny! You must be an incredible salesperson because you seem to love doing it.

    Question - Is Amour the non-sparkly version of Orgasm?

  22. Morning Mel!

    I hear if you order it online, they ship it too you in a plain brown wrapper!!


    Thanks for stopping by this morning, dear Mel!

    Have a wonderful Thursday!

    P.S. less than TWO WEEKS til Halloween!!!!!

  23. Geez, whatever happened to foreplay?

  24. Good Morning Lady Nitebyrd!

    Hey...knowing BOTH our sense of humor....I was thinking of YOU when I put this post together!!!

    Orgasm blush would be a great add-on to your new busines!!


    So do you KNOW NARS???

    Have you used it?

    Honestly, I can't remember if Amour is the matte version of Orgasm. But the thing with Orgasm is this...the "shimmer" you see in the blush, has more of a "light-diffusing" guality than say, glittery. If applied with care...the blush should give a GLOW, rather than anything resembling sparkle. With Nars, because of the high pigment, you barely need to use more than just a swipe of blush.

    And yes, my friend...I really DO enjoy being in the sales industry. For as much as people irritate the living SHIT out of me...I enjoy a job where I can offer service and an excellent product.

    I have to LOVE what I sell or I totally SUCK at it.

    Thanks a bunch for dropping by this morning, Nitebyrd!

    It's always so great talking with my twin sister!

    Enjoy your day!

  25. Welcome..Always Home and Cool!

    OMG...your comment was GREAT!!!

    What a riot!

    I think this blush is probably intended AS foreplay...leading up to...

    Hey...thanks for stopping by and sharing your humor!

    Much enjoyed!

    Enjoy your day!

  26. Wow. I've never heard of such a thing--the blush, I mean.

  27. Hi Diane!

    Very GOOD!!!

    That was great!

    Yes...the blush comes with directions...

    please DO NOT use while in a library!

    HAHAHAHAHA! changed your avatar!!

    Looks GREAT!

    I really love black and white images.

    Thanks for stopping by today, Diane!

    ALWAYS so nice seeing ya!

    Enjoy your day!

  28. Oh I'd want to have several of them! ;)

  29. Evening Dianne!

    Well...for just $25.00 you can have all you want!

    And the BEST that it's LONG LASTING!!!!


    God love ya, woman!!!!

    Thanks for stopping by today, Dianne!


    Enjoy your evening!

  30. Wow look at you giving quickies during lunch breaks. I would love to get an orgasm. Is this not every woman's dream. Get an orgasm pay a little price?

    I need to get that orgasm look applied all over my face!!!!

  31. OMG...Domestic Diva!!!

    That's SO DAMN FUNNY!

    I know...with Orgasm Blush, you can get a QUCKIE during your lunch break for only $25.00!!!

    And it's TOTALLY safe too!


    Hey, listen...I was just thinking about you today, because I got those "goodies" I promised you and will be mailing them to you tomorrow!

    *and I may even add a little Orgasm Blush!!!!

    Thanks for stopping by, DIVA!

    Always a HOOT talking with you!

    Have a great evening!

  32. Wow..this time you gave me multiple orgasmic laughs and you left me breathless. hee, hee

    I swear you and Jeff should start a comedy club!

    Thanks for an afternoon laugh!

  33. Evening Dear Gypsey-Heart!

    I know...isn't the name of this blush such a NOVELTY???

    The guy KNEW what he was doing when he named it ORGASM!

    It's actually a very good produc too!

    OMG...isn't Jeff a RIOT???

    LOVE his humor!

    Thanks for stopping by, dear friend!


  34. hey, I have that too! :P

    no no no(blush), I REALLY do have it and it's great...the perfect hue! I am wondering how you "sell" this?

    "I know what you need..." ? oh, just forget I asked that...

  35. Hiya Linda!

    So nice seeing ya!

    You're so FUNNY!!!! actually HAVE this blush????

    YAY...I have a confirmed YES!!!

    Isn't it just the PERFECT color???

    I worked for NARS for only a year, but thoroughly enjoyed it. The color line has something for EVERYONE!

    Whether someone likes natural...or likes's a perfect line!

    And the Orgasm Blush????



    Thanks for stopping by this evening, Linda!

    And thanks for adding your imput on the blush!

    Hope you're enjoying your weekend!