Friday, January 23, 2009

Forgetting...Why and What

I’m beginning to think that all the Elmer’s Glue I sniffed in catholic school, has finally come back to haunt me.

Or maybe it could be that now, because I’m 53 years old, my Temporal lobe is slowly shrinking like a hemorrhoid.

But lately, I’ve been doing something which I find very frustrating …

…like forgetting WHY I went to do something.

Has that ever happened to you?

The other day while I was brushing my teeth, I suddenly remembered that I hadn’t balanced my checkbook in a few days, so I thought… “Oooooh, you better go do that immediately.”

So after rinsing my mouth I walked over to my desk, but when I got there, I paused confusingly and thought…

…“Now WHY the hell did I walk over here???”

This has been happening to me quite frequently.

But I finally figured a clever way to remember WHY I walked into a room.

You see, if I reverse my body movements, by actually walking backwards from where I came, I suddenly remember WHY I walked forward in the first place.

It’s sort of like pushing the rewind button on a DVD player. You can go back to the beginning of a scene and then see what you’ve missed.

Hey…but it works!

Another thing that I’ve been doing…

…is forgetting WHAT I went into the grocery store for.

And in this case, walking backwards doesn’t help, because I’d have to walk 13 blocks backwards to my apartment and I’d look like a total ASS, so I refuse to do it.

A lot of the times when I go shopping for just a few items, I’ll grab a basket and start walking down the isles and then suddenly blank out…

…“Now WHAT the hell did I come in here for?”

So I end up meandering around the store; staring at all the shelves like a lost puppy, and hoping that by spending two hours looking at every single article of food in the store, I’ll finally remember WHAT.

I know…I know I should make a grocery list, but you see, the only reason why I don’t like to do that, is because I want to train my brain not to rely on a silly piece of paper; forcing it to remember things on it’s own, so that my brain actually becomes STRONGER.

But as far as I can tell…that’s working like SHIT.

No…No…

…I think what I really need to do, is go back to the way that my Aunt Anna-Mae used to remember…

Have an UN-forgettable weekend, everyone!

X

Please Note: I'll be out for most of the day on Saturday, so I'll be responding to comments later in the evening. Thank you for your patience and understanding, folks!