My inspiration for this post came from my dear, longtime blogging friend, Debbie @ Musings by an ND Domer's Mom, who is not only a gifted...

This is the time of the year when I have to start using a lip balm.
I’m not real fond of Chapstick, because it always feels like I've just applied a tapered dinner candle to my lips.
Each year I like to try a different brand of lip balm, because I believe in taking chances with my life and living dangerously.
Anyway…about a week ago, while was in the drug store purchasing my daily addiction of Cryst-O-Mint Lifesavers…I happened to see a lip balm by the cash register, that was on sale.
So while standing in the GOD FORSAKEN LONG LINE and WAITING FOR HELL TO FREEZE OVER…I picked up the lip balm and read the package.
I instantly liked what I saw, because it claimed to be all natural and contained Pure Beeswax, which meant that it would not feel thick on my lips.
Another plus, was that it claimed to give the lips a “natural finish.”
Not only can I not stand the feeling of waxy lips, but I’m also not fond of when a lip balm makes my mouth look as if I’ve just applied two coats of clear nail polish. I swear, some lip balms end up looking so shinny, I feel like I should also be wearing a lip liner.
So I thought, “What the hell, Ron…buy it.”
As soon as I got outside, I ripped open the package and swiped some on.
It felt really comfortable on my lips, and also had a nice citrus taste.
I was very happy with it.
And as I was running errands all afternoon, I kept reapplying it. I went to the bookstore; went grocery shopping; stopped at the Dollar Store…and then home.
I like to brush my teeth the minute I get in the house, because it makes me feel refreshed. So I headed for the bathroom and flicked on the light.
And when I looked in the mirror, I couldn’t believe my eyes.
My entire mouth was coated with sparkly GLITTER!
HOLY SHIT…had I REALLY been walking around all day, looking like this???
I immediately grabbed the lip balm out of my backpack and inspected it closer…
…DAMN…there it was…little specks of clear GLITTER!
And I’m thinking to myself, “Why in heavens name would they put GLITTER in a natural lip balm that was intended to protect and moisturize???
And if this was their idea of a “natural finish”…I’d hate to see what their definition of a HIGH GLOSS finish would be.
I couldn’t help but imagine what people were thinking of my lips all afternoon....
It looked like Tinker Bell had just SNEEZED on my mouth!
Categories:
Related posts
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)